Aa
Aa
A
A
A
Close
Avatar universal

Interactive with my girlfriend's 9-year-old daughter with ADHD

My girlfriend's daughter was recently diaganosed with ADHD. Since then, my girlfriend has distanced herself from me so much that I haven't seen her in four months. She recently agreed to see me and explained that her concerns for us not being together was because of her daughter and her condition.
I told her I wanted to help her and her daughter, but she's not sure she wants me to be around her daughter as it may cause a negative reaction and furthermore me spending time with her mother might also have a negative affect.
I told her I was willing to do anything to be with her and to be a positive reenforcement in her daughter's life.
I am looking for some advice on what I can do as a boyfriend to show my girlfriend that I can be apart of her and her daughter's lives.
I have had interactions before she was diagnosed so she does know who I am. I suggested we start with a weekly activity or something where I am involved so that the child gets use to me being around, like cooking them dinner or taking them out somewhere.
Is there anything else I can do or things I can suggest to my girlfriend to show here that it is okay for me to be with her and be in her daughter's life as well.
Please help!
I should also mention that she doesn't want to put her daughter on medication.
2 Responses
Sort by: Helpful Oldest Newest
757137 tn?1347196453
Since what the mother has to say regarding you and your relationship to her ADHD daughter makes little sense, I would assume the girlfriend no longer wants to see you. That is not what you want to hear, but it would appear to be true. It is sad to lose someone you care for.
Helpful - 0
189897 tn?1441126518
COMMUNITY LEADER
   Probably, the best thing that you can do is to learn about ADHD.  This site gives you tons of info - http://www.help4adhd.org/en/about/what
   I like your idea about gradually getting to know the child.
   I am a little worried that you have not seen your girlfriend for four months.  Kind of makes me wonder if she is not using her daughter to give you another kind of message?
   Oh, one other suggestion.  Order the book, "The ADD/ ADHD Answer book," by Susan Ashley from Amazon (about 10 bucks).  And then give it to your girlfriend.  Its probably the book I recommend the most and it will really help her and her daughter (and just might help you get back into the picture :))   Best wishes.  
   If you have any specific questions about ADHD later on - please feel free to post!
Helpful - 0
Have an Answer?

You are reading content posted in the ADHD Community

Top Children's Development Answerers
189897 tn?1441126518
San Pedro, CA
Learn About Top Answerers
Didn't find the answer you were looking for?
Ask a question
Popular Resources
Fearing autism, many parents aren't vaccinating their kids. Can doctors reverse this dangerous trend?
Yummy eats that will keep your child healthy and happy
What to expect in your growing baby
Is the PS3 the new Prozac … or causing ADHD in your kid?
Autism expert Dr. Richard Graff weighs in on the vaccine-autism media scandal.
Could your home be a haven for toxins that can cause ADHD?