Aa
Aa
A
A
A
Close
Avatar universal

Help, again

I have been in a bad dark anxious place and two weeks ago picked up again after 90 days clean. Today I decided to cut back to 60mg of codeine a day for one week and then ct again. I was feeling so ashamed and out of control but the using just made everything worse (of course) and the anxiety was awful. It has been a difficult time, etc etc...all the usual stuff, two deaths, illness, grief and finally drugs again. Thank you Gizzy for your help. Yes, I am ready to stop!!!!  
I was too ashamed to post. How could I use again? This is the first time I feel calm since I started using again. I am glad you all are still here.
9 Responses
Sort by: Helpful Oldest Newest
495284 tn?1333894042
Oh girl dont ever feel ashamed to post here.  Most of us have relapsed so we know about that.   Sometimes we just have to find out the hard way.  You have had a ton of pain in the last 90 days.  I hope you are feeling better and coming to some sort of acceptance with the grief.  Please keep posting when you can.  I am really glad you are back~~~~~~sara
Helpful - 0
1032715 tn?1315984234
We're all here for you just keep posting Denise
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
I am sorry for all you have been through lately. You posted, YAY. Don't keep beating yourself up over this, relapses are tough, but the longer we stay down the harder it is. I am proud of you for posting and stopping again. We are here for you girl.
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
A HUGE thank you to everyone who has reached out to me. I don't know what I would have done without you.
Helpful - 0
401095 tn?1351391770
Getting back on track is hard..but it sure is easy to jump off track!  I think part of recovery is screwing up here and there..we learn each time we screw up...and it makes us stronger...few get clean and never screw up once..so count urself as normal! whatever normal is...u are posting Zillian and u r trying..do u know how many peeps never even try to get clean nor do many even care about their clean time...u r gonna do this cos u want to do this  (:
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Thank you for your support. Things have been going really well. I guess the aftermath of my dad's death is settling down.
Helpful - 0
401095 tn?1351391770
Zillian...how r doing with everything?
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
ZJILLIAN had a run in with pneumonia and hasnt been up to par - - she reports still clean but could feel better and needs a dog trainer!!!  
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Thanks guys. I have been down with pneumonia and my husband has been having seizures for the past 5 days. BUT BESIDES that all is well. Still clean but very tired.
Also trying to get control of my dog pack who have taken back the house. It is a struggle and so far they are wining.
Helpful - 0
You must join this user group in order to participate in this discussion.

You are reading content posted in the ADDICTION RECOVERY GROUP Group

Didn't find the answer you were looking for?
Ask a question
Popular Resources
Herpes sores blister, then burst, scab and heal.
Herpes spreads by oral, vaginal and anal sex.
STIs are the most common cause of genital sores.
Condoms are the most effective way to prevent HIV and STDs.
PrEP is used by people with high risk to prevent HIV infection.
Can I get HIV from surfaces, like toilet seats?