Emotion abuse?

[Kalyeranee]

I'm 15 and pregnant. Yes I know I'm young and I'm paying the price. The father keeps telling me how I'm pathetic and theres no way its his even though he was the only guy I've ever done anything with. This has caused me to go into a depression only I cannot take medication due to me being 8 weeks. He tells everyone i m a ***** and all I did was cheat on him and everyone will see it when it comes out not being his. He said I'm on my own until there is a DNA test. Is this emotional abuse? What could I do about this?

[RockRose]

I don't know how much value there is in labeling this behavior as emotional abuse or not,  but there's not much you can do about it except decide you don't want to interact with him anymore.

Once the baby is born you can get a DNA test and then pursue child support.

[allmymarbles]

It is not a question of abuse. He is just rotten. What to do? You can put the baby out for adoption. You can have an abortion. You can go home to your parents and ask for their help.

What you cannot do, unless you are so upset that you are not thinking clearly, is to keep yourself tied to this creep. Is it wise to have a DNA test? Do you really want someone like him to be involved in the life of your baby?

You say you "cannot take medication." Are you on drugs?

[thatquietgirl]

I would suggest seeing if there are any drugs you can take at some point in the pregnancy.  While many psychiatric drugs are dangerous for pregnancy, there are still some.  Talk to  your OB/GYN about supplements such as fish oil and St. John's Wort.  Don't take these until you are told they are safe in pregnancy, but they are known to help in depression.

I would also suggest staying away from your child's father.  He is absolutely no good to have in your life.  If someone brings him up or any of the rumors he is starting about you at school, tell the person you don't want to talk about him or that.  If they persist, simply walk away.  You need to get away from negativity to help lift this depression.

Journal as well.  Tell yourself something positive about yourself each morning when you wake up and are looking in the mirror.  Do some light exercise (maybe a walk if weather permits) to help lift your energy and mood.  Talk to someone you know you can trust about what you are going through.

But most of all, stay strong and don't listen to this child's garbage.

Best wishes!  You can do this.

[specialmom]

I agree with the others.  I think what it really is is a guy who doesn't want a baby and he's trying to get out of it.  

You are so young hon.  I would understand that he won't be there for you.  You can have a paternity test after the baby arrives but that still won't make him be with you long term or a father to the child.  You can go for child support but that often isn't much if he too is a teen and makes no money.

So, I would focus LESS on him and more on the bigger picture.  Pregnant at 15 is huge and your life is about to dramatically change.  How are your parents taking the news?  Basically, they become responsible for caring for another child as you are not an independent adult yet able to care for your child, so you will need their support.  I would focus on the plans for the baby if you plan on keeping the child.  (as adoption is another option---  which can be a really win win for all involved if bad timing is involved in a pregnancy).  Things like who is going to watch the baby while you finish school, how you'll pay for things, the idea that basically your social life has now become a baby, etc.  It's a HUGE responsibility.

Things happen and sadly, you got pregnant with a guy who wasn't committed to you or wanted a baby and most likely won't be there for you.  I wouldn't call it abuse as much as someone that just doesn't want to be involved with this.  

peace and best of luck getting through it all.  

[imagirlxo]

I don't know what emotion abuse is but I do know that when you have your baby that you should take the DNA test to make sure he is the father. If he's the only person you had sex with then try getting him to be calm when you talk to him. Your not pathetic! don't listen to him or anyone. think about if you really want this child or not. how does your parents feel? do they understand that you didn't mean to get pregnant?  I'm only 13 so I don't have any advice to share on how to take care of a child but I do know that just cause your 15 doesn't mean you won't be a great mother with your parents help you'll do great

[homemadesoup]

I HAVE ONE BIG COMMENT FOR YOU   RUN WHILE YOU STILL CAN VERBAL ABUSE IS ABUSE I WENT THROUGH IT FOR TWO YEARS AND SOMETIMES THE VERBAL IS WORSE THAN THE ACTUAL PHYSICAL ABUSE AT LEAST THE PHYSICAL ABUSE SCARS GO AWAY THE VERBAL PUTS HOLES IN YOUR HEART... GET OUT OF THAT RELATIONSHIP TELL HIM HE IS TO PAY CHILD SUPPORT AND PROVE THAT IT IS HIS AND ONE BIG MISTAKE I MADE WAS GIVING THE FATHER OF MY CHILD 50/50 CUSTODY DONT DO THAT MAKE YOUR CHILD BE WITH YOU AS MUCH AS YOU CAN IF HE VERBALLY ABUSES YOU HE WILL ABUSE YOUR CHILD AS WELL  RUN HONEY RUN.........

[Mmarkey19695]

Hey sweetie,

Do you Parents know about your pregnency? Do your Parents know this boy? Do your parents know how he is treating you and the lies he is telling everyone?