I don't know what to think?

[michelle775]

Okay, so when I was about... 4 or 5 years old, my mom and my biological father were together. From what my grandmother told me, they met at a club.
I remember vague memories of my mom and biological father getting into fights. One stuck out more than any other.
It was when i was 4 and my parents were fighting,( although i dont remember what that fight was about now) but one thing led to another and i remember my mom picking me up and running me and her into my room and locking the door. Then about 5 or 10 minutes later my dad knocks the door down and my mom hides me under the covers and punches my mom. When I look back i remember him aiming his fist at me though.
The next day my mom and her dad (my grandfather) were talking and he was telling her that it would be safe to leave him a.s.a.p. She didn't until around a year later. That wasn't the only insident where they got into huge fights i just don't remember all the details.
But most of the time my mom would go to school and my dad would be left with me and i would be late for school because he would forget to take me.
Another thing happened where I came home from kindergarden with my friend and my dad left a note on the door and the door was locked. So since I was just in kindergarden i roamed the streets until my friend decided we go to our neighbors house. I don't know how long i was away from home but all i remember is coming out of a car and my mom screaming and crying?
Well now i am 15 and  not too long ago I made a email account  and my dad and his mother (my grandmother) found my online and emailed me. I told my mom and my step father and they took the email down and said he doesn't love me and he wants me for all the wrong reasons.
I don't know what to think because in that email my biological father said that he DID love me and all those things he did he wished he could take back...
I feel like there is always somthing missing in my life and even though he did do wrong things and he did drugs and at the time he seemed to not care.... i still wounder what it would be like to talk to him and get to know him again?

[margypops]

I would also say now that if you consider him dangerous in any way go with your gut and stay clear of him ...good luck

[missi042]

there is always good in people that should be recognised by someone. He made some pretty horrible mistakes by the sounds of things and I think that shouldn't be forgotten. If you do decide to give him a chance than that is 100% your choice and know one elses. But i would keep my guard up since he has a history of abuse and neglect. It is possible you are setting yourself for disappointment which, i would imagine, are your moms worries. rightfully so! But you have to find out for yourself or you will always wonder.

[margypops]

As it is many years later and people do change and do have deep regrets about the past I have to say that I think he should be given a chance, it would be a good idea to meet him and your grandmother together first time It has to be your decision not any one else's , you are bound to have family who wont want you to meet him.You would do this for you, I think it would be a healing thing in your life that you would be glad about, if you don't at least meet him you will never know, he may have changed, he may not .. Take a chance... it may work out and you could repair your relationship with him ,two parents are a good thing ..good luck .

[Torihoo]

My grandmother was in a relationship with a man (not my grandpa) who beat her so she snuck out with her kids (mom and uncle) in the middle of the night and they moved across the country. They were scared to death of him and never dared to go back.

Also my dad rarely saw me when I was younger and he bounces from jobs and can't support childcare. I also felt this emptiness lurking and that I just wish he'd love me, but a magazine article with a similar story said to let it go and to move on. I started crying upon reading that but I'm still trying to let go.

If you know he can be dangerous you shouldn't trust him, people can change but they'll most likely change back. Good luck, I hope I was helpful

[Torihoo]

My grandmother was in a relationship with a man (not my grandpa) who beat her so she snuck out with her kids (mom and uncle) in the middle of the night and they moved across the country. They were scared to death of him and never dared to go back.

Also my dad rarely saw me when I was younger and he bounces from jobs and can't support childcare. I also felt this emptiness lurking and that I just wish he'd love me, but a magazine article with a similar story said to let it go and to move on. I started crying upon reading that but I'm still trying to let go.

If you know he can be dangerous you shouldn't trust him, people can change but they'll most likely change back. Good luck, I hope I was helpful