opinion

[qu3stion]

I read this article about a fraternity brother sexually assaulting a member of his own fraternity while he was passed out. The person had no idea until he stumbled upon photos on the assailant's computer later on. (Some of you might have read about this in the news a few years back.)
These stories kind of make a person wonder about all the times they drank and blacked out or passed out. At first, I was thinking wtf.. but then I saw online that this kind of stuff is not that uncommon.

Here are a few questions I'd be interested in hearing your opinions and answers on:

1. Is it possible to have been anally raped without any recollection if you were passed out from drinking? Wouldn't there be fragments or flashbacks if the person can remember most of the night's events?

2. If the person does not remember anything, wouldn't they at least feel something wrong when they wake up? Even if the assailant was careful to be gentle, wouldn't the person feel it the next day?

3. What are the symptoms? If there were no sign of any of these symptoms when the person woke up/ the next day, is it still possible that it happened?

[qu3stion]

Scary to think about, I'll definitely be making sure I stay under my limit

[specialmom]

I am sure there are times in which someone may be raped and not know it.  Yes, it is a possibility.  

[qu3stion]

So if you were passed out from drinking and woke up a couple hours later with no signs of anything happening such as pain or soreness- it is still a possibility?

[Life360_Dave]

Hi Also.
1. yes and maybe
2. most likely
3. yes

Pure speculation without any photos left in the computer or other after the event evidence, can only accomplish  pure speculation.

If you suspect this of a person have them take a lie detector test. If they are innocent they wont might if they are guilty they will mind.

[qu3stion]

You make a good point, but to have no idea the next day? No bleeding, soreness, pain, irregular bowel movements, etc?

If it were done so gently and a condom was used, wouldn't there have to be a lot of lube? If so, wouldn't there be remnants left over the next day in bowel movements or clothing?

[specialmom]

Hi there.  Well, I really think the take home message about that situation in the fraternity is that getting super drunk is not smart.  We should always be 'aware' and if substance takes that ability away from us, it's NOT a good idea.  Life is full of dangers and I personally want my eyes open and my ability to handle them to not be impaired. Drinking in excess like that is just plain dumb.  Dangerous as the fraternity boy found out what can happen when you pass out.

However, he passed out in a group of friends.  So lesson number two is to think about the people you hang out with.  Do they want you to do things you'd rather not---  like get completely wasted?  Are they a bit unsavory wit their own morals?  I mean, the guy who did this not only did it but VIDEO TAPED it.  That's some sick stuff man.  He most certainly had red flags in terms of his personality and we need to be okay with saying "nope, that guy has a screw lose, or sleeps around too much, or gets way too drunk and wants me to do the same".  And make good choices about the company we keep.

As to your question, wouldn't every situation be different?   some would certainly realize something happened.  Some would have a vague dream like memory.  Some might have some signs on their body.  Some may have nothing indicative of the assault.  So, each situation is different and can't be categorized so neatly.

Better to think about what we can control.  Take away the drinking, the fraternity boy never probably would have had this happen.  I am by no means saying it is his fault but it is not prudent to live your life that way and think nothing bad will ever happen.  We need to remain in the right frame of mind and not put ourselves at risk like that.  good luck