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Need help

Hi I hope I'm in the right place. This is my first time doing this. I hope there is someone out there that can help. I found out about a year ago my husband has been addicted to morphine and other pills. He used to be so strong and dependable. But he's lost so much weight and muscle tone his face is sunken in. He would fall asleep all the time. His moods are terrible. He can go from so happy to suicidale in one second. I confronted him and told him I love him and will help him quit what ever it takes. I researched rehabs and wanted him to go. He broke down said he wanted to quit and needed help but wouldn't go to doctors or rehab he said he could do it on his own. So we tried. He went through terrible withdrawals and would relapse. I took care of him even when he was horrible mean. This went on for about 2 months and he said he was better. But I know he's not. He lies about everything now. Where he's been what he's doing. I find pulls and things and his behavior is going back to how it was. He doesn't see it. I don't know how much more I can take I'm so worried about him. Now I can't help because he won't talk about it or admit anythings wrong.im so depressed and feel like I failed. Please someone have advise I have no where else to go or anyone to talk to. I've been trying to do this alone and I can't anymore.he doesn't realize how this effects me nor does he care anymore. Thank you for taking the time to read this.
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Avatar universal
I have a 20yo kid with addiction issues too, you have to make his life as hard as it can be. I'm guessing you have the job? You pay all the bills? Keep money away from him. If he gets violent call the police, he will only stop when he is ready to stop there is nothing anyone can say or do to make him stop sorry to say. The weekends are a little slow so stick around there are others that will post. Hit me up if u need someone in the meantime, we are in the same boat sorry to say.
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Avatar universal
Thanks for commenting. Just knowing someone is there is nice. I do pay all the bills. He has a job when he goes. Sorry to hear about your son. I'm here if you need to talk I don't know how much help I am but I'm a good listener. I changed my bank account so he doesn't have access because all the money was gone. I don't know how to make it hard for him. Any ideas?
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Avatar universal
I email the police every name and phone number he calls before I notice he is high, I give them as much info as I can about the dealers, I'm hoping he will be scoring when the  police are watching. I have given them all the info about him that I can so that when they do contact him they will search him for drugs. He won't be able to hide forever, I wish he would figure it out before he gets put in jail but I think that's a dream. I've seen many of the people he knows show up in the recent arrest report for my town, I'm sure his time will come.
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3149845 tn?1506627771
Hi and sorry to hear this about your husband. His drug of choice is one of the most addictive out there and this is not going to be a short and easy road for both of you. Quitng this cold turkey he will need professional care. You say this has been going on for a year and thats a long time for you not to take some professional action to help him.  Dont believe him and if you love him you must take strong action now. Call a hotline about this and get intervention. Do what ever it takes to get professionals involved even threats to leave him. A strong ultimatum is necessary. He must chose you or the drugs. keep posting
dave
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Avatar universal
Well put
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3149845 tn?1506627771
you to!
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Avatar universal
That's a good idea about the police. If he gets caught maybe that would be a wake up call. It would be terrible but it would give him time to think about things and I would know he was safe. I think I know who he is getting it from. My husband is not a bad person but the drugs have turned him into someone I don't know anymore. Good luck with your son and thank you again.
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3149845 tn?1506627771
On top of the drug problem you dont want a felony conviction on his record as stays for life. Better to get treatment
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Thanks for advise. How do you make someone get help that won't. Do you have the hotline number to call? I know I need to give him an ultimatums but I don't know how.
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Avatar universal
Under the influence is a mistameaner not a felony it his dealer you want to get the felony charge on. Possession of small amounts isn't a felony either usually. If he cares about the felony maybe a night in a smelly jail cell will wake him up? You could look up your local laws it may take a night in a cell to wake him up if it doesn't then God help him. Unless he's been in a cell before? They aren't nice places especially in populous counties. In California users get drug court not felonies. So check your local laws . Drug court makes them accountable by testing for up to 5 years. It takes a lot usually to get the felony charge.
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