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Avatar universal

Blew it lastnight big time

So I drank my brains out, dont rember nothing, hungover still, cant figure it out, happy all day, go to store come home to gloom and doom did a 10 hr shift tonight. must be that bi-polar thingy in my brain, geez i cant remember being this sad and deppresed in a long time. swag.......im not really expecting any replies to this! just wanted to get it out........anyone know if sway js online?
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Avatar universal
Hang in there go to 12 step meetings find friends there it is a way of life new people new hobbies new social activities etc.
Helpful - 0
495284 tn?1333894042
COMMUNITY LEADER
Talk with your boss and see what he says.

Suicide is not the answer, recovery is~~~~~
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Thanks for  all feedback , if I dont respond its because I must go to work soon but I still have a little more time left,
Helpful - 0
340590 tn?1290952141
you can do what you need to do with or with out her...whether she is there or not you need to get into some after care and get started on the journey to recovery...i think addicts are their own worst enemy...
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
I dont know if it is a wise choice . but when I go to work I will ask my boss, tell him everything as I am feeling suicidal , if I go to a 30 day program, admit myself, will I still have my job? I know by law that is true, but Im certain I will be replaced, someone has to keep things going, and I am paranoid they can find other ways to fire me, around the system.
Helpful - 0
495284 tn?1333894042
COMMUNITY LEADER
This relationship is very toxic and you 2 have to make a decision whether to continue or just split.  You have to make you a priority and do whatever it takes to start living a healthy happy life.......
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
You dont know my situation , she has issues too, and they are not about my drinking, how would you like to put down for being on the web having things thrown at you, insulting me, and even when I do just stop, it continues, im not drinking dont plan on it and Im being mentally abused by this woman and I wish she would just leave!!! Its gonna be a fun time at work tonight I may not even come home... yes its that bad.
Helpful - 0
340590 tn?1290952141
i wonder how much more she can take...its really hard when an addict tells a loved one they are changing and dont...i have been on both sides of addiction...matter of fact my daughter just relapsed and will be leaving her 3 year old with me for another 18 months....you need to stop saying you need to do this or that and do it...go to meetings, get a therapists and start moving forward....
Helpful - 0
495284 tn?1333894042
COMMUNITY LEADER


They have AA meetings everywhere and they are free.  There are also addiction specialists or counselors and are usually covered under insurance.

You say it was only one night but look at the chaos that was caused by your decision to drink......
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
It was only that one night, I was doing well prior to that and Icant leave my job , I do need those meetings however and pepper now wants to leave me today and go live with her sister in wisconson, man she just dont get it and I do want to set her free, because I cant live like this much longer or I myself will be in the obituaries. I cant take the yelling and putdowns all morning and then go work a 10 hour shift in a factory shortly. swag
Helpful - 0
495284 tn?1333894042
COMMUNITY LEADER
Putting down the alcohol and getting into some type of recovery care would be a start.  You have to start dealing with your issues.
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Any suggestion on how to get out of my own head and not dwell on thinking so much about stuff that bothers me?
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Another day to rethink all this and to get outside my own head, yes Im using someone elses line here. Wish I had  not done what I did mon night, all was going well, and to answer a question from that night-Its not that easy to just pick up and start painting you have to be focused and very much outside your own head. But I know what you meant, so I will listen if it ever happens again, not looking forward to another 10 hr day, seems I have little time for much else, not feeling the big d , but its early still. swagg
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
no more post I need some sleep badly........night
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
I did make up my mind, many times, when I feel hurt, sad and lonely I drink......I have been depressed most of my life, since I was 4 or 5 yrs old, how much worse could it get the depression and mood swings? benzos are a depressant also but i was feeling happy for 3 days even with the benzos also my doctor stated that he feels i need the benzos.... more confusion?
Helpful - 0
495284 tn?1333894042
COMMUNITY LEADER
Until you make up your mind to get sober this sort of thing will keep happening and your depression will keep getting worse.  Your choice.........
Helpful - 0
199177 tn?1490498534
swagger alchol is a depressant if you quit drink that right there will help ALOT .
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Im so confused right now, I do know social makes me feel better, I do like to laugh and connect with people and that helps. Ive stated many times I do want get help with this but I am also dealing with major deppression issues and ADs make it worse, There is a void missing somewhere, and Im not sure was it is and I dont understand why happy for a while then snap!! Dont suggest lithium as it makes me sick. thanks swagg
Helpful - 0
199177 tn?1490498534
swagger you are going to have to make up your mind to you want to get clean or not .If you do you need aa meeting s there cant be any beer in the house you cant hang out with people that drink .We all get along here but are main reason for being here is to help each other threw addiction and WD and recovery . .Are you sure you are ready ? You seem to be very interested in the social aspect but not about the fact that you are an addict . I hope you chose to get sober your life will be far better its just hard to see right now because you are still using.
Helpful - 0
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