Why do some people never come back?

[Brokenbutglued]

I've seen many people come and go here. Why do some or most people post and then never come back?

[Mangee]

There are many sides to that question. Some believe that once done they must move on to the business of living a ,"Normal life," Some believe that some of the people here would feel less then they really are if they touted  their success. Some just can't take the pressure of seeing others as they are and so on. There is no shame in being a former addict and no shame in being an addict who is trying to shake the habit. There is also no shame in using the success of withdrawal to lead others to the same. All too often we feel that crowing about our successes would send those who have problems dealing with withdrawal, backwards. What is wrong with, "Hey, I made it and I would sincerely love to help you get there also?" Running away from the plight of others does not help but can hinder them in that they begin to think that they are losers. Not so! There are no losers here! There are those who have perhaps failed a time or two but they are still here trying as hard as they can to be a winner. The fact that they continue to try in spite of their many pitfalls says a lot. I applaud any effort, no matter how big or small, by anyone who thinks ,"I am going to get there. Maybe a small step at a time, but I will get there and anyone that thinks different better get out of my way!"

[mikchez]

Hello everyone, this is only my opinion I think the reason stems from writing in  and then feeling embarrassed and stupid about what might have been written in a state of mind of either withdrawing or using.
I know why they suggest in meetings to not cross talk I know for me when someone crosses talk something I said,
I feel like **** afterwards.
The truth is where all here to help each other and the new people are very essential to all of are recovery.
We get busy with our recovery.
And what happens is out of our 2 primary purposes’ to stay clean and sober, and getting back to being a productive member of society.
We get back to living a life without the use of drugs.
For myself,
“ I don’t ever want to forget that MISERY of using!!!!”
I am grateful to this site and all the members that write in and those that don't its been a part of my recovery.
Thank you all…….

[GoingToMakeIt]

Some move on (or away) because they are back into using and are too shamed or afraid to admit it. Others go because this place did what it was supposed to. My advice is to give it all you got while you're here. Make a commitment to stay and to learn all you can. Then pass that learning on to the new ones that need coaching. Some of us lurk and post every so often.

[BornofOsiris]

Usually people disapear cause there using and to ashamed of coming back. Of course some people will loose there internet or comp. Sometimes the people never leave they will just "lurch" and read posts hoping to get some motivation to quit drugs.

[catmagnet]

I agree. Life changes and people have to move on. Sometimes I feel like a broken record posting similar replies to similar questions. But I am and always will be around, though. And when I feel like I can really help someone, I speak up. If anyone would like my opinion on something, I will always give an honest answer. But it's nice to see what ideas other people have...

[Addict63]

Becca said we got to give it away to keep it. I believe that's the spirit of recovery in a nut shell.

I've been in AA for years, and now NA as a newby. Many folks come and go at my meetings. Who knows where they go. I imagine here on this site, as folks get their brains back to what they think is normal, they either go back to normal life or hit the meeting circuit and forget about this site. On here, just like AA & NA, we share our experience strength and hopes with one another. What we used to be like, what happened, and what we are like now. But here many share what it's like, what's happening now, and poof! Gone... I know I can't do that.

I am so grateful to God and this site for helping me along as I go through WDs, I plan to remain here, one day at a time.  Plus, now I'm hopelessly addicted to this site :)

[beatingthis]

It also means we have been there. I know for me , It was the same questions over and over. Not complaing just trying to say why most of the old timers move on. Not to mention life moves as well.
That is a good thing. We have paid and we have put back in believe me.
Now its your turn.

Terry

[Mikeinthesouth]

I believe some people come when it is hard and leave to not come back because like in the meeting rooms they feel they can control it. Maybe they can control it as for me it is a big green eyed monster that eats my soul not to mention takes its toll on my finances very badly. Also I agree with the post here that some lurk as I lurk here and there just to read and jump off which I should be sharing my clean time experiences to help others. I have been seriously doing service work for the 12 step program I am a member of and have lil time anymore free as I am home lately only to sleep it seems. Love you all, Michael

[Mikeinthesouth]

Cathy is still around isn't she?

[wantitbad54]

I think there many who have been here and when it appears their gone, their lurching around, reading hoping to get something of it, or like me forgot their code to get on here, and while using, it seemed too much of a hassle to call or e-mail and get another pass word. I lurched for two years, I'd always jump on and read but coulden't contribute anything, even wanted to . So Finally I was missin it here so bad and wanted to be a part of things again, I did what I needed to do. Their around, just a sure as I was. I feel it. Come out, Come out where ever you are. Your missed and we want to hear from you.
Lonote/ I wantitbad54/ Cathy

[Beccabeccalynn]

I think some people think that after they have gotten clean they believe that they are done. For me staying connected and helping others is what keeps me in recovery so I read and post and go to meetings etc. . .gotta give it away to keep it. I also think pride and ego keep peoe from coming back after a relapse it is simply to hard for some. Getting honest with ourselves and others is key.
Becca

[LateAugust]

I have never said this,  but I really appreciate your comments  and the words you share..  I don't always agree with you,  but that is okay, I am not that narcissist
to not appreciate and see one with a great deal of wisdom.  Saying it straight, is you.....  All of the times you post of after care is always consistent and so very true...  

I am just one person, I get that,  however your words are so very true and an asset to this forum, and I guess I just wanted to say thank you for all you do  and what you contribute...

I wish I would have told you this sooner....

[GA Guy]

These forums are just like rehabs and the rooms of AA and NA. Unfortunately, some people are just not through drinkin' and druggin'. And, most people feel uncomfortable coming here while using because it shows them their addiction in full light. Hopefully they find help elsewhere, or come here for help before the addiction takes them to jails, institutions or the ultimate bottom...death.

[TurningANewLeaf]

I agree, if not for those folks who have walked in our shoes and provide the wisdom to help us along our journey.  I am going to stick around.  Just may not be on every day.  If anyone sees someone in need of help getting of the fentanyl patch, please pm me and I will get an email sent to my ph.