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Avatar universal

32 weeks pregnant and this has got to be the end

I have been taking pain pills for about 5 years now. A 7.5 would get me high for about a year or 2 and then when I met my husband it got worse. He liked taking them on the weekends, just for fun just like I was doing. We had a great hook up so they were always available. We would take hydro or percocet 10's on the weekends and then none throughout the week. Of course it got worse and then we were on to taking them ALL the time. The money we spend on these things are ridiculous. I found out I was pregnant in June 2011. I stop taking them for a week because I was so high off the fact we were having a baby and didnt want to do anything to hurt it. We decided to get 4 perc 10's one night and then never take them again. He had 2 I had 2. Well that started the roller coaster back over. Since I have had a healthy pregnancy and the baby is growing exactly like he is suppose to (he is actually measuring a week bigger than he is suppose to be) it made me feel like it was OK and the baby wasn't being affected by all of this. I know I shouldnt be taking pain pills and  the only problem I have found is risking the baby being addicted and going thru withdrawal once it is born. I want to stop my last 8 weeks to ensure baby be born pain free. Today is my first day without a pill. My doctors have no clue I take these pills. I go to all my appts and everythings is always great. I have had a 4d ultrasound and he is the prettiest little boy EVER. His heart, kidneys, all his organs are perfect via ultrasound. I just know this has to be the end of it all. I can't take anymore. I have tried my whole pregnancy to quit and never made it past day 1. My husband and I have talked and we are doing this together. We know in order to have a healthy baby this can not go on! I have been taking up to 30mg of hydro's or percs a day. Whichever we had. I take 15 mg at a time mostly a dose in the morning and a dose at night. Some days 45mgs but that is only like once a week. I do chew the pills when I take them to get a faster high. This is the first time I have admitted this and I feel terrible just writing it. I feel like I can't get up in the mornings without a pill just to clean, cook, play with my daughter or even have a good day. I have went maybe 2 days without a pill through my whole pregnancy and I do have withdrawals but I dont think they are as bad as most go through. I think mine is more mental and that is where my problem is. The physical is not great tho, I dont want to do anything, even be nice! And of course I am the sweetest person EVER when im high. No one knows about this besides my husband. I just need to STOP and I am so scared of not getting high anymore!!!!! I dont need preaching on withdrawals and pre term labor, or that I need to talk to my doctor. I am no doing that. I have tried weening myself off by cutting down the mgs everyday and I always do good until I am about done and then I just give up and do 15mgs again. I have to quit cold turkey there is no other way, I just need support, someone that was in my shoes. I hate these things, they consume my life, I live around them and this has to be the end...it has to be!!!!!!
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Avatar universal
would you be willing to talk to me? i used illegal oxycontin off and on throughout my pregnancy. i tapered off and have been clean since thanksgiving day, november 22nd, 2012. i am due february 17th, 2013. i live in california and assume that upon delivery they test the baby's poop? I am worried that upon delivery my baby will be born addicted and show signs of wd. could this be the case? is there anything i can do on my behalf to prevent wd? obviously, i'd appreciate any feedback. suggestions. whether professional or not. thank you kindly.
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Avatar universal
I'm 30 weeks I was prescribed pain pills until I was about 5 1/2 months and last weeks I just quit taking them. I am so scared about the meconium test because when I didn't have mine from my doc. ( not my Ob) I would take other meds nothing big or alot but not what I was prescribed the doc knows about me taking what I was prescribed can they still call cps on for that. And and since I did quit at 30 weeks can my baby still go though withdraw at birth if born on my due date or 2 weeks before. I know the baby is ok cause it moves all of the time
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Avatar universal
Hi hun. I know exactly how you feel. I'm 27 weeks and have been on oxycodone for about 5 yrs due to sciatica nerve damage and lower back pain. It's not meant to be my excuse, it is what it is. I've tried every month to stop taking these prescribed meds & my OB knows I take them, but the pain gets so bad, I end up with bad anxiety and can't eat or drink anything along with violently vomiting or dry heaving. So here I am taking my prescription of 90mg oxycodone per day. My ultrasounds look good to, but I am scared of problems that can't be seen in an ultrasound. To top it all off, I broke my tailbone 1 1/2 weeks ago so I'm in even more pain. I support you in every way together off the pills. But I understand how addiction works cuz I am an addict too. It's basically how I got pregnant. We were too high to worry or care about protection. Now
my daughter's father took of across the country cuz he thinks he can get away & not pay. I'm afraid I'm going to be a horrible addicted mother & CPS will take her. My mom says she will fight for her, but that means I'd have to move out (I live w/my widowed mom) & I don't have a ywhere to go.  I can say it and admit that it's hard for me to do as I say, but just concentrate on what you want most, your baby. Unfortunatly if you go cold turkey, that can be dangerous for the baby. They are fragile yet strong. If cold turkey hurts you, it hurts him too. Good luck sweetheart! I'm trying too to get clean. Hopefully I can do it too.
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Avatar universal
My God, I was just where you are in May 2012...I had my first child, a daughter, May 2, 2011. Afterwards, I got addicted to Percocet. I found out I was pregnant with my son August 2012....I continued taking pills...once I built up a tolerance to those...I started snorting Opana 40s...
Well those became unavailable, and let me tell you something..those were the WORST WITHDRAWALS both mentally and physically I have ever experienced. When I found out I couldnt get those anymore, It was like a death in the family...
Eventually I found Roxi 30s. I snorted up to 3 of these everyday for the last 4 months of my pregnancy...And miraculously, my son Was not born addicted in anyway. DO NOT ask me how? I mean I snorted a Roxi 30 just hours before I went into labor (3 days past my due date)
CPS never got involved, my drs never questioned me, my son is a happy healthy 5 month old right now, and i STILL to this day can not figure out for the life of me WHY or HOW he was not born addicted. Dont get me wrong, I am so thankful, but i still wonder...
Sadly enough, my childrens father is gone in rehab for 6 months, so i have been left to care for our 2 small children by myself, so I am still addicted to these monsters....
With the crazy life i have right now, i cannot afford to have withdrawals right now....
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Avatar universal
Hi, my name is Felicia and i've dealth with and been around drugs, pregnant users, convicts, fuctioning addicts. I've seen bad outcomes and people's kids get taken away and them go to prison and i've also been pissed off seeing a druggie get their kid back 6 times by using someone else's urine to pass drug tests.. I read all 130+ posts with anticipation and empathy, frustration and some judgement. But i am SOOOOO proud of you for being and getting sober. You didn't tell your doctor and you didn't get caught or get in trouble or anything. You weaned yourself and stayed sober!!! You are being such a great mom to your two kids and i am so so so proud of you and your husband!!! Congrats on your healthy little one.. I have a 4 and a half month old daughter (I didn't use ever during my pregnancy though) and it makes me happy as sheet to hear how awesome you and that precious baby boy are doing! Hope breastfeeding went well too, we breastfeed and it's hard but worth it. :)) STAY strong and keep up the good work. I hope you see this message and know that you are supported. And despite everyone telling you to tell your doctor, you did what you felt was right and no harm came of it... Everything couldn't have had a BETTER outcome for you and i hope you remain sober for those two babies. Congrats on your healthy son and your journey into sobriety again. <3
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Hi, my name is Felicia and i've dealth with and been around drugs, pregnant users, convicts, fuctioning addicts. I've seen bad outcomes and people's kids get taken away and them go to prison and i've also been pissed off seeing a druggie get their kid back 6 times by using someone else's urine to pass drug tests.. I read all 130+ posts with anticipation and empathy, frustration and some judgement. But i am SOOOOO proud of you for being and getting sober. You didn't tell your doctor and you didn't get caught or get in trouble or anything. You weaned yourself and stayed sober!!! You are being such a great mom to your two kids and i am so so so proud of you and your husband!!! Congrats on your healthy little one.. I have a 4 and a half month old daughter (I didn't use ever during my pregnancy though) and it makes me happy as sheet to hear how awesome you and that precious baby boy are doing! Hope breastfeeding went well too, we breastfeed and it's hard but worth it. :)) STAY strong and keep up the good work. I hope you see this message and know that you are supported. And despite everyone telling you to tell your doctor, you did what you felt was right and no harm came of it... Everything couldn't have had a BETTER outcome for you and i hope you remain sober for those two babies. Congrats on your healthy son and your journey into sobriety again. <3
Helpful - 0
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