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60 days clean!

Hey all, i just wanted to shout out that i am clean for 60 days and i do feel really good.  Im sleeping and my energy is back and the triggers are few and far between.  I want to thank medhelp and some of my cyber buddies on here for all there help to getting me to where i am today.  A special thank you to Vicki, IMDoneNomore, Gnarly, and Tiff, you guys have really been there for me and i do applaud you guys, thank you, thank you.....
     Now, here goes the big concern i have, so if you recall i had surgery 5 months ago, and as of 2 weeks ago i have been experiencing pain, UGG.  I am trying to determine if this is real or if this is in my head.  I have been really monitoring this and i actually did put a call out to the surgeon.  i will go ahead and get an xray to just make sure all is in tact with me.  I pray this is just the normal pain for me and that this is not an issue and the pain does not get worse.  Unfortunately, this is the story of my life and there always seems to be a problem with my leg.  I am actually at the point now, that i am so determined to stay strong and learn to live with the pain im having, as i do not want to resort back to the demons, thats for sure.  Thank you all for listening, Dane
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1700643 tn?1464846682
Congrats on 60days.that's awesome.I'm sure everything will be fine.keep that positive attitude up it really helps a lot.
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Avatar universal
HI DANE good to see you post I try and ketch thes at 60 and 90 days but thers so many I miss most but a big CUDOS to you for getting threw it your on your way to feeling like a human again you will still notice suttle changes all for the better as you go along im glad I could be part of your recovery and at the same time your part of mine it works both ways keep doing what your doing stay pluged into aftercare and you will come out on top of this thing its always great when one more makes it congrats to you....I trart myself to a pound of shrimp every 30 days to celebrate because without my sobriety I got nothing as Sara would say keep your Guard up goood luck and God bless......Gnarly  
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Avatar universal
Congrats Dane........I can't wait til I'm at 60....good to see that it gets even better..
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1768519 tn?1313814475
Way to go!! I am 104 days clean and I am chairing meetings WOW! I know about pain just hang in there.
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Avatar universal
Congrats on 60 days!! i hope the everything works out and u dont have to go for surgery.. good luck
I was wondering what are u taking for sleep.. I have been off methadone for 38 days and i cany sleep a wink unless i pop a stupid ambien..I tried val root, melatantonin,  etc, nothing works for me.. if u know of anything really good pls let me know.. thanks
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1551327 tn?1514045867
Congrats on 60 days.  I hope you hold it together....

It is not the same thing but one of my friends relapsed recently because he had his leg amputated and months later he had pain in the leg and foot of the leg and foot that wasn't there any more.  Turns out that the prostetic leg he had was causing the pain.  After he switched to another leg, the pain went away  : )

You have a body but you are not your body.  All pain is in our mind.  Sometimes our mind is telling us to figure out a way to treat the pain.  It is not a requirement for it to be pain medication but it is out there and once you know what blood taste like you will want blood for the rest of your life when those craving pains come back.  Good Luck and stay strong.
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Avatar universal
Dane:  Wonderful!!   You had an especially difficult time and that makes this all the sweeter!!

What OTC's have you tried for the leg pain?  It's surprising how aspirin/Motrin/Tylenol can work!!  Let us know what the xray/doctor says...xoxo
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Avatar universal
   Just wanted to congrat you on day 60 I am on day 60 today. Your posts inspire me I have been following you since the very beginning . I remember the whole weaning down process and look how far you have come, so proud of you keep up the good work, I am right there beside you in clean time.   GOOD JOB!!!!

                          Mag
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Avatar universal
Hey all thank you for all your words of encouragement!  @ Bubulous, thank you for sharing your story, and you know what, i never really thought about pain being in our minds, i somewhat agree with that.  But i will agree, that our minds are so darn powerful.  I am actually fighting amputation, i had a staff infection when i was a baby, and throughout my life i had surgeries every few years, hence 2 knees replaced and most recent the hip, my bones in the left leg where destroyed by the infection.  So now i am on what the docs call limb salvage. I know i have real pain, but like you said i need to find other resources on how to deal, and to be honest it's not easy.
     @rich4dallas, as for sleep, ever since i hit the 40 day mark, i started sleeping, i do not take anything for sleep and i only have one cup of coffee in the am.
      @Vicki, i stopped the  Celebrex, as i found it did nothing and i was getting the side affects from the med so i stopped that.  I take Aleve,  ibuprofen and that's it.  I have allot of nerve pain i know your a nurse so you know what im talking about, the burning in the groin and thigh are awful, i was on Neurtion a while back for the nerve issues but that really didnt work either, and i was on the max dose.  The weird thing is when i was around the 20-30 day clean time my leg/hip felt great and then i started feeling the pain.  I honestly chalked it up to my mind wanting pills.  But as time goes on the pain is still there and worse now then where i was at around day 30.  Not sure what the heck is going on here to be honest.  My surgeon is up in NY and im down south so i have to wait for him to call in an order for an xray.  Hopefully i will find out something late next week.
     @magnoliaoo,  congrats to you too!  Glad i inspire you, don't know how i did, but if i helped in any way i am happy:))  Your right, the tapper was not an easy thing by any means and i do honestly feel that getting clean was the biggest challenge i have taken on in my lifetime.  Keep up the good work

Thanks to all,
Dane
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Avatar universal
Thank you for everything!  Thanks for the info on your personal experience.  It just ***** because  i do hurt and i am not sure what the heck is going on.  I am,  thank God not at the point where i NEED the pills so thats a positive.  the confusing part of all this is when i was 20-30 days clean i was feeling great pain wise of course i had it but nothing to complain about, and now, it's obvious, i need to ice and take ibuprofen all day, so i am confused.  And then there is a part of me they says its all in my head just to make an excuse to take pills and i promise you this i don't want to go there.  Just the other night, my hubby said yet again, that its so nice to have ME back and that im not cranky and irritable all the time, so the last thing i want is to be a bitchh all over again.  Chronic pain just ***** and i dont know what to do or what to think.  Sorry for the whining, this is so not like me......XOXO Dane
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Avatar universal
HI Dane cronic pain is ruff but once your clean a wile your brain will build back up the natural endorphins once again.....most of us here have forund that once your past thr rebound pain you can live more pain free without the meds then with them ...hell I was up to 150mg of methadone.....10mg is like 8 t0 10 percs so I was on an insane amount then even that quit wirking for pain .....nowthat im clean I deal with less pain overall then b/4 the pills simple ibuprofen 800mg takes the edge off I still have 2 herniated disks and 3detrorating but like many of us here we do a lot better without the pills so dont get discouraged your time is coming and you to will find your pain a lot more manageable hang in there keep posting for support we willl walk this thing out with you we all want to see you get well btw your doing ausum......Gnarly
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Avatar universal
Thanks Gnarly, How long do you need to be clean for your brain to produce its natural endorphins again?  Its been 60 plus days and i thought i was past the rebound pain am i wrong?  I am so confused....But i am sure i want to remain CLEAN, i have come so far and i want so badly to BEAT this, thank God i have the shrink on Tuesday...LOL  Also, is this battle of addiction a forever battle?  uggg, i thought once i got past a certain point it would get easier, i guess i am have a few weak moments:((
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Avatar universal
HI ONE OF the resons that both N/A and A/A say 90 meeting in 90 days is this is how long it takes the brain to rebot itself so although it could end tomorrow for you it often takes 90 days as for the addiction ....you will always be an addict im an addict in Christ Jesus and fight it on both a piratical plan with a conslor and often N/A meetings but I also fight it spiritually I do believe with all my heart there is a side to this that battles the powers and principality of darkness it helps to fight on both plans it does get ezer as you progress you learn to surrender to it play it on its terms instead of trying to change the terms aftercare makes the whole thing a lot ezer your doing great your off to a good start your seeking help if you can put God in there it will help also I always say I couldent do this without God and pray for everybody on this forum some specifically when God  lays them on my heart....I have watched alot of people do this you have your ducks in a row and your going to be on of the ones that make it just stick to the plan try not to grow discouraged and remember its all about attitude a good attitude is something we choose every time we look in the mirror in the morning and so far yours rocks keep pressing forward you will find living in recovery a joyful thing it just takes some getting use to good luck and God bless......Gnarly
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Avatar universal
Oh...I really never knew about your leg problem. I hate pain!!  You know me...I just want to pass meds and make everyone feel better!!!  It's odd how that pain crept in...maybe something new going on?  And you know Sweetie: sometimes we all need to take something for pain when it's like that...so don't suffer!  I agree with getting to the source and,of course, don't ever take Tramadol again.  But...I think you know what I'm saying here. If it's serious pain,post op,etc...it has to be treated.

It does get easier but it's always there to some degree. After awhile you just roll with it and that becomes second nature!!   Stay in touch...oh...have you tried any topical pain relieving products?  
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1416133 tn?1351123217
Yeah me too - I was never aware of the leg pain.

And I have to tell you your experience is so similar to mine.  At first I dealt with the rebound pain (awful) but then after a little time there was almost no pain.  Then after a few months the pain started to become bad again.  But it was at that point that I found the OTC pain meds so effective (funny that stuff never worked for me before).  I do think gnarly is right - you start to produce the necessary endorphins to combat that pain and it does get better.

My rheumatologist just started me on celebrex and it has been a g-dsend for me - truly it helps so much with the pain, inflammation, etc.  It's not something I'll be able to take all the time but during those rough patches I'm so relieved I'll have something more than the OTC stuff to help me.

I do think vicki is right about getting to the source of this pain and seeing what you can take to help.  There are so many options out there today that are non-narcotic so it's worth looking into.  We don't have to be martyrs here right?  I have found that part of recovery is finding reasonable and thoughtful ways of dealing with our issues - physical and mental.  It's a process but one that does get easier with time.

And we'll be here for you!  Oh and I wanted to mention I SO get what you mean about your husband being so happy to have YOU back - mine too.  Little things seem to matterthe most - the fact that I remember the little stuff he tells me - or that I'm completely aware of my surroundings (no longer living in that fog ya know?) - that I laugh and smile more - that I that I am actually HERE - REALLY HERE - those are the things that make him smile.  It's a great feeling isn't it?  And I wouldn't give that up for anything now.   :)
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1416133 tn?1351123217
Sheesh I'm awfully "chatty" for 8 in the morning on a Saturday huh?  Sorry about that long post!!!  LOL
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Avatar universal
Way to go. 60 days is amazing. I'm at 8 and by the grace of God hope I to can get to 60 days. You a great example to everyone. Thanks for posting.

Tattoo
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1741355 tn?1311457956
Congrats on 60 days!!!!  Way to go..you are a inspiration to all of us that we can do it as well!!!!
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Avatar universal
Thanks guys for all your words of wisdom!!!  I am hanging in there, and just icing and taking Ibuprofen.  Vicki, you mentioned topical pain relieving products, nope never tried that yet.  What is it?  Do you mean like begay?  If so that does not work.  I have allot of burning pain, i am assuming this is nerve pain.  With Irene and all, i have to wait to get ahold of the surgeon.  Maybe i need to get back on Neurotin?  
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