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A little inspiration

Hi everyone! Sorry for the length but it could be pages if you have been like me and you will understand. I just wanted to come on here and say that I finally got clean. I am on my 12th day and it's pretty great feeling. I have been on this site since about October 09' when I originally started to try and quit. First of all I wish to thank all the people who stood by me and answered my posts, especially Bob! If he hadn't showed justntime like his name I would probably be dead. Thank you Bob! Now to anyone out there who is struggling with addiction let me tell my story, I hurt my knee over a year ago, so I go get an MRI and take it to the Dr. Well lucky me I live in Florida the Oxy capital. So the Dr. gives me a script of 210 30mg on my first visit "1rst Visit". That's when the insanity began. I started taking a 1/4 at a time then 1/2 then 10 then 20. I was taking up to 5-600mg every day, if I didn't take atleast 300mg I was hurting, bars also lot's of them.  I was running hard since then to stay out of withdrawls, and reality. I tried so many times to step off the ride but I could hardly even slow it down, made a new years resolution that I would be clean by April, well that didn't happen. So I made a new one, to be clean on my B-day and it's happening.  To anyone reading this that is taking these pills stop while your ahead we put ourselves into so much trouble, pain, and sickness. I was sick when I took meds and I was sick when I didn't take them. Let me just say I was sick and tired of being sick and tired, you see these drugs sneak up on us and take so much from all areas of our lives " financial, friends, then one day our life". That was not going to be me so I finally got it together, I went down to 300mg aday then 200, 100, 50 in 4 days and stopped, I CT the bars also (that sucked no sleep for like 8 days), but it was the smartest thing I have done in along time. I wont sugar coat it, I was sick bad, I pulled an abdomen muscle, but guess what the 7th day I woke up and felt great, and I have been ok since then, and look at my dose!  All I am trying to say is if I can do it anyone can, people said that to me and I didn't believe, but it's true and I wish I had done it a year ago! Take the advise of the people who have been there, been to hell, came back we are here for you all. I know two people that are dear to me quit and have 8 days because they saw me and said if I could then so could they and it has solidified my resolve to help others.  It *****, it's not fun, but it so easily doable,  who hasn't had the flu? That's all it is a week of the flu for a lifetime of sobriety, and it's getting better daily! I only want to inspire because I was so scared of all I had read that it kept me running all over for pills, we can't run forever! One day we have to pay for all the play, it's unavoidable so hopefully sooner than later. God bless and if you have questions or comments please post.

                                                                                                                                     Thanks everyone!
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Avatar universal
yeah I know Bob "Aftercare" "Recovery" I don't like these terms and have a hard time with them. You see I thought I was invincible until oxy's, I hate thinking I'm not in control and could relapse at any time possibly for the rest of my life. It's just my process I'm not gonna do the **** no matter what because there is no excuse now I know better. Or maybe I'm just naive, time will tell. I went from seconds to minutes to days, now weeks are gonna pass and I'm gonna count the **** out of them, and be all I can!
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Great job AND attitude,

Aftercare is an AMAZING idea and may very well make the difference in you STAYING clean.  The strength and endurance WILL return, you just keep keeping.

To "stupid172":  YES we are waiting for our update!!!!  Time to brag!!!!

Both of you give me inspiration and I am pulling hard for you!!!!!

bob
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Thanks everyone, I am working on aftercare I go tuesday. To tell the truth after all I have been through I don't want to use there are to many bonuses plus I strongly hate everything about addiction now that I know it so well now. I have been extemely lucky in my withdrawl and have had no real cravings only lack of sleep but it's getting alittle better, oh and I have been getting exercise but I feel like I'm 80 instead of 30, I don't have alot of endurance at the moment but I'm working on it. Thanks again everyone, it's nice to finally be on the recovery side, I went to the pharmacy and they did not look at me all crazy, it's alot of small things that seem to count in the beggining.
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Avatar universal
Congratulations on your 12 days! I know exactly how Florida is! And, I also had the hardest time getting clean. I haven't posted on here for months! This is the best time to do so!  I'm so happy for you!
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
CO!!!!!!

There are people here who I consider true friends and you most certainly are one of them.  We came to MH at the exact same time.  Yes I took the plunge a little sooner than you and yes your inability to get off your butt and get it done frustrated me sometimes as you played the addicts game and vowed to start "next week" or "next month" but I never doubted that you had it in you.

Know that I am so incredibly proud of you.  I had a hard time getting the smile off of my face on the day you contacted me to tell me you had 10 days clean.  I know your struggles and all you have been through to get where you are CO and you deserve this.

I've been pulling for you for a long time and I am crazy happy for your 12 days.  

Your friend,

bob
Helpful - 0
352798 tn?1399298154
Nice testimony! Be sure to read up on PAWS in the Health Pages here. Little things can creep up on you later and hit you hard if you're not prepared for them. Congratulations on getting clean! Life will continue to get better.
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199177 tn?1490498534
BTW congrats you did it :)
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199177 tn?1490498534
It sounds like you are doing great . you are right week of flu like symtoms for a life of sobriety .Have you found a recovery program aa/na or an addiction therapist because this is where the mental part starts and a good support system can make all of the difference in the world
Helpful - 0
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