927542 tn?1244723050

Been prescribed 80mg. oxy's for 10yrs.-time to quit

Hi, I found this site and read and read for about 2 days before joining.  I was looking for answers to questions that may never get answered, but I thought I'd give it a shot.  
I'm a 45 yr. old homemaker, wife of a wonderful hard working husband and I have 1 son who is the love of my life.  My son is 16.  When I was 33yrs. old I lost my first husband to a sudden heart attack, he was my son's father.  A few years passed and I was having a lot of pain through out my whole body, lower back, etc...I went to my family Dr. and after a few months and lot's of tests and MRI's he finally said that I had Fibromyalgia and also 2 herniated discs in my lower back.  He gave me Lorcet, then Lortab, and I was taking them as prescribed.  After a few years, I was getting concerned about what the acetamynaphin was doing to my liver & kidneys, so he told me about Oxycontin.  He started me on 80mg tabs.2 in the morn. and 2 in the evening.  Back then (in like '98 or '99)they were suppose to work for 12 hrs.  Well a few years went by and of course the 4 80mgs was'nt cutting it, so he upped my dosage to 3 80's in am and 3 80's in pm with roxicodone in between for breakthru pain.  Now the time line is up to about 4 years of me being on this medicine.
My family Dr. moved, but not before helping me find another Dr. to take over my treatment.  I was evaluated by a pain clinic and with their evaluation they told me I could either continue to go to them or I could go to a Dr. closer to my home.  Of course I chose the later, it meant I did'nt have to drive as far.  So I started going to a Dr. who took over my care.  The Dr. was female and seemed very compassionate.  She would tell me every once in while that my dosage was really high and that taking 6 80mg.s of oxycontin and 4 roxicodone (for breakthru) was'nt good.  So I said, "how about I cut out the roxicodone then" and she said "that's fine, but I don't think your pain would be very tolerable, so I'll up your oxycontin to 4 80mgs in the am and 4 80mgs in the pm.  Well, she's the dr. right?  (in a sarcastic tone)
At this point, I've been on oxycontin for over 5 years.  I continued with the same Dr. until 2007.  She left the practice and I was handed over to another Dr. (female) who was nice, but was'nt comfortable giving me such a high dosage of this medicine also.  Every time I would go to see her, which was about every 3 months, she would give me my scripts but at the same time, she would tell me that "I really don't feel comfortable writing for this amount of narcotic" and so on.
I know what she was saying, but if it bothered her so much, why did'nt she say, "listen, we have to cut you back on these" or something to that affect,  But nothing.  Believe me, so many times I would think about this horrible situation, and I say that because it is horrible.  It's horrible because it ***** when you finally get comfortable with a Dr. and they leave the practice.  Then you have to hope and pray someone else is going to help you, and then you start thinking, "Are they really helping me?"
So now the time line is NOW:
I've been on 8 80mg. oxycontin for well over 6-7 years and I know everyone is probably thinking, "Dam, this woman must be so zonked out all the time", but believe it or not, I never got plastered on them.  I'm totally functionable and actually volunteer at an animal shelter part-time and am active in my son's school and other community activities.
I went for my quarterly visit to my Dr. last week and found out that she will leaving in the fall.  So we talked for a while and she said I could either go to the pain clinic, or try to find another Dr. that will prescribe this amount which will be very difficult.  I don't want to go to the pain clinic and finding another Dr. is going to be a task in itself.  We both decided to start weaning me off of the oxy's.  She figured if I take 40mgs. less for 2 weeks and so on and so on, that maybe I can do it on my own from home.
Does anyone think this is possible?  I know there are a lot of different types of addiction/dependence and I know that everyone is different, but is there anyone out there that has gone thru anything like this before?
The last question I have is, What am I suppose to do for pain if I do get thru this and am able to cut down, I know my pain receptors are so damaged that God only knows what a minor cut on my finger would feel like?
I'm really nervous, but I'm not ashamed of myself.  I did'nt wake up one day and say, "wow, I think I'll go to the Dr.'s so I can become dependent on narcotics".
So there it is.  Any thoughts on my situation?.
Oh, by the way, I really don't want to go on anything else.  If I am able to cut down to a lower dose, then that's great, if not, I'm not going to substitute one problem with another by going on suboxine or the "M", I don't even want to think about that,  I know it has helped a lot of people, but I just don't want to do that if I don't absolutely have to.
Thanks for reading this long post.
Take care, All of you and thank you.
Much love and respect
4 Responses
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340590 tn?1290952141
WOW that is alot of oxy.  it does not sound as if youare trying to get off the narcs, just like you want to lower your dose?  its doable...but it wont be easy!
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Hi Caffee,
I read your post - all of it - with great interest and empathy for where you are.  I too suffered from debilitating back pain and my doctor started me on Oxy and Perc and I stayed on them for 14 years - only going up on the dosage from time to time.  I reached the same point you are at -- KNOWING that I had to take matters into my own hands and quit.  I guess I finally realized that after 14 years I had lost the old 'me'.  I wanted to know what it was like to travel without worrying about whether or not I would have enough pills to last me or my next refill or the scowling pharmacist across the counter, or a myriad other disadvantages of being addicted.  Here is the way I did it.  I began to taper --- going to about half my former dosage -- then I heard about the miracle of Suboxone.  Although at the time much had been written on this site about the evils of Sub, I somehow missed reading the negative stuff about it.  So, I plunged headlong into Sub.  All I can say is 'what a mistake' ---  I stayed on it for 21 days and tapered down to only a crumb.  But it had me in its grip -- it doesn't let go.  I suffered horrible W/D's for over two months -- all of them.  I mean runs, lethargy so bad I couldn't get out of bed most days, sleeplessness, RLS, shakes, and psychological problems - (crying, depression, etc).  But I stuck it out, even though at times I felt it would always be like this.  I have a wonderful family and they stuck by me and somewhere about two to three months later I began to come out of the fog.  I got clear of the opiates and will never go back -- I am sure of that -- - I cannot imagine walking back into that nightmare again and putting another opiate into my mouth.
Now, here is the way I should have done it.  I should have continued to taper as much as I could stand.  You will likely need someone to hold and dispense your pills on a set schedule.  It is just too easy to cheat if you do it yourself.  The single best thing I did was to tell my doctor what I was doing because I knew if I did, she would cut me off and my supply would be gone.  She was very compassionate but has not written another script for me since - nor have I asked her to.  I would recommend you continue your taper.  You will find other ways to handle your chronic pain -- much of which will go away as soon as your body learns that you are not going to give it what it wants - the opiate.  There are many other ways of non opiate pain relief.  Research them all from chiropractic to acupuncture to OTC meds, deep massage therapy, etc.  I still live with the chronic pain and it is very difficult at times but the difference in my quality of life is so much better it is worth the trade.  The old me really is back.  I could go on and tell you of all the advantages, both physical, mental, and emotional -- even the S word is so much better - but that is reserved for an X rated site. :).  Yes, it is tough - very tough - -but so worth it --  I can promise you that you will never be sorry if you stick to your desire and quit.  I am so glad you have read enough about Methadone and Sub to steer clear of them.  You can do this - this site is wonderful and filled with compassionate people who will encourage you and offer great advice.  Some of it you will want to follow and some you will say 'no thanks'.  I often say it is like eating a plate of chicken -- you can swallow the meat but spit out the bones.  Only you can decide what is good 'meat' and what is 'bones'.  I wish you all the best.  Please continue to post.  Blessings in your journey -- I believe you will make it.  Get some help --  stay strong.  Ochealed (formerly Ochooked)   Ps - oh yeah, one more thing -- after a while it will probably be better to switch to Percocet, b/c it is not timed release like Ocycontin.  much shorter acting so doesn't stay in your body so long.
Helpful - 0
401095 tn?1351391770
I also have a chronic pain problem..supposedly fibromyalgia?? to me a vague diagnosis..I have had neck surgery and 3 discs are completely deteriorated..several herniated/or bulging..ruptured is where the problems come in as most anyone over 40 has herniated discs or some degree of disc narrowing/i hurt where i should hurt by my xray so why the fibro dx?  dunno..but pain is real to the person experiencing it and this i know...i do know narcotics r not a recommended choice for fibro..not is it good to control pain long term due to tolerence...sometimes narcotics can actually make ur body send pain signals and actually put u in more pain..the recommended drugs for pain and fibro are lyrica, neurontin and cymbalta...neurontin being the only one i tolerate well and it helps tremendously
Yoga and stretching, massage, heat, ice, anti-inflammatories, muscle relaxers on occasion, steroid injections unfortunately every 3-4 mths but it is alot better than taking a bu11load of narcotics evryday...i got up to bout 100 mgs of hydro and saw that this tolerence thing never ends cos 3 yrs prior 5 mgs a day would hold me..dead end street for sure..I found a great pain dr and he also put me on testosterone injections for nrg as fatigue can getcha with chronic pain or fibro

i dunno what to tell u but u already know that is an extraordinary dose of oxy...and if kept up then u may not be able to get pain relief at all in a few yrs..eventually u will lose the scrip//at least at that dose cos most legit drs would not write a scrip for that much..so in a way u may not have a choice..maybe now but perhaps not later....and alot depends on wheteher u r an addict or just dependent of the oxy..and only u know that...if u r an addict u will have to get off for good...if not u may be able to taper to a lower dose but physical wds will probably occur/mental wd only if u r an addict

anyway..i feel for u and want u to knopw there is alot of support here..there is also a pain forum..make a plan and let the forum know..there is lots of support here
Helpful - 0
927542 tn?1244723050
Hi and thanks for your input and support.  I just want to make a few things clear that I should have put in my first post.  Yes, the amount of Oxy I'm on is very, very high, but you have to remember that it's been like this for a long time. Years, not months.  I've never run out early, never called saying I lost them or anything. I only go to one pharmacy and have always done that.  I took them as prescribed.  I know everyone's tolerance builds up after time, but since being put on the amount I'm currently on, I've never needed an increase.
I also have tried Lyrica, Cymbalta and other NSAIDS for pain relief for the fibro and back with no success.  
The other thing I did'nt mention was that on SuperBowl Sunday, Feb. 2006, I broke my right leg and ankle.  I had a compound fracture tibia and fibula, both bones came right out of my skin, and had a long surgery leaving me with a rod from my knee down to the ankle and two plates in my ankle with 22 screws.  Wow, what a mess that was.  So on top of the back pain and fibro, I also have to deal with my right ankle.  And let me tell you, it's been giving me so many problems.  I'm trying to get in to see a foot & ankle specialist in Philadelphia.  I was told by my primary Dr. that it's possible that all the metal in my leg and ankle will have to come out.  So I'm not sure what I'm going to do if that's the case.
Anyway, getting back to the first post.  Something clicked in my mind over this past week.  I really think that I am stronger than I ever give myself credit for.  Since actually hearing the DR. say to me the other day, that we need to start decreasing the dose of my meds. I guess for the first day, it simply scared the **** out of me, but the more I thought about it, the more I realized, this is a chance for me to do what I've always known in the back of my mind that I need to do. And that is to lower my dose on my own. I have a journal and everyday of the week I made a chart.  I mark down what I take and the time I take it.  My Dr. wants me to take 40mg. less at 2 week intervals, but I'm doing a lot better than that.  When I looked at Weds. & Thurs,, I realized that I've already taken 3 80mgs of oxy less for those two days.  I know I'm just starting this whole decrease ordeal, but maybe it is possible.  Only time will tell.  I do realize that there is physical and physcoIogical dependence on this drug .  Just not sure how strong of a hold  each has on me yet.  I know there is a difference between being addicted and being dependent, but I think it's a fine line.
So, I better end this post before it turns into a novel! LOL
Thank you everyone for replying and keep sending all your positive thoughts and prayers and I will do the same.
Take care.
Helpful - 0
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