Bidding farewell to my life on pills.

[6stringrock]

I came off of hydrocodone a few weeks ago only to break out with the shingles and have to go back on it along with neurontin. The pain was so bad. I think the worst pain I have ever felt. I tried to go through it without anything but the pain was just to unbearable. Now the shingles have cleared up. The nerves in that area are still getting back to normal and every once in a while a little painful but I do have some 800mg Motrin. I was taking about 12 lortab 10's a day and sometimes 20 of the 5's if thats all I had. It is time to bid these pills fair well once and for all, When I first broke out with the shingles I went to the doctor to get meds for shingles. I told him my struggles with the hydrocodone. The doctor happened to be a pain management Dr. He said why don't I put you on a stronger pain med to help with the pain of the shingles and was going to prescribe me oxy 30's to take every 4 hrs and once the pain went away then I could go on suboxone. He said that some people stay on suboxone there whole life. I ended up telling him I would just rather stick with the hydrocodone. I got my script and never went back. I guess I'm not as bad off as what I thought. I could probably go there and get whatever I wanted but it really bothers me that a doctor would put money before humanity. I'm also reading the book "Natural Cures they don't want you to know about". It's enough to **** you off so bad you will never want to take another pill again in your life. I have about 10 pills left and I'm going to destroy them. I guess a symbolic gesture of finally being done with them. Wish me luck.

[pattifan]

Just an irrelevant comment.

You're quite right about the ocean being therapeutic.

But I live about 10 steps from the beach, and I find I often don't really appreciate it. It's there every day so I stop noticing it. I like forests!

Maybe we all just want what we can't have!

Take care

[pattifan]

Hi,

You've done amazingly well and you're going to start feeling good soon.

Stick with it and let us know how you're getting on.

Take care

[nuredshuz]

how nice that you live so close to the beach.... that plan you mentioned abt staying on the beach for a few days sounds sooooo awesome... you should do that & i bet youd feel good in no time... just chillin and listening to the water and thinking good thoughts... im jealous!! :) the ocean does wonders for the soul and you have it right there for the taking... i hope you are feeling better and i hope you go to the beach!

[tryntogetwell]

Congrats on your clean time!! Your on the down hill side from here. You are a great inspiration to me and others on this forum! Keep posting we love to hear success stories on here!

[Cris718]

Glad to hear your doing well.  It gets better day by day......I promise.

I understand the "lost" feeling.....I remember feeling like I lost my best friend.  But now at 20 days.....I know that it was an enemy.  Your brain will start to regenerate those natural feel good endorphins....the excersise has really helped me.

Praying for you......

Cris~

[laurel453]

hi..

you are on day 5, right ? the exercise in going to help you a lot and if you are sleeping and not feeling bad....you are doing great !!! :)

congrats on your clean time,stringrock :)

[6stringrock]

Feeling much better today..still a little achey but I have been walking alot and went for a swim yesterday. Only thing is I feel a little lost...like I dont know what to do next. My brain isnt quite working. My appetite is slowly coming back but I have to eat very small portions at a time. Also I slept for about 6hrs last night with the help of melatonin. I doing well though.

[pattifan]

Fine if there's a local drop off point, but I really don't think flushing's harmful at all.

Just look at all the things we already flush down our toilets (apart from the obvious!) and wash down our kitchen sinks. Bleach, detergent, dishwasher tabs, washing machine powder, oven cleaner, drain unblocker, disinfectant.... some of them with serious chemicals that will hang around for years.

If someone has made their decision to quit, they need to get rid of all their supply ASAP, before they change their minds.

By the time our pharmaceuticals are diluted down and washed into the water supply, I doubt there'd by enough left to put a silly grin on a fish.

Take care

[Cris718]

too late.....he's already flushed......lol

How are you today btw?

Cris~

[scoenen]

OUr local police department allows you to drop off narcotics in a drop box and then has a pharmacist come it once in a while to destroy them.  Call your local department and see if they have some kind of program.

I had asked my doctor about flushing he told me it was not a good idea.  I also had left over Fentanyl so I had to find another way to dispose and I did not want to put them in the garbage.

[Cris718]

I know......there's nothing easy about quiting.  Getting away sounds like an awesome plan.  Get through this week, we're all pulling for you.  It does get easier as each day passes.  I promise.

Change up your routine, that helped me a lot.  Instead of getting up and popping a pill in my mouth, take a vitamin.  It seemed to help with the fixation of taking pills, ya know?

Are you having a bad physical W/D?

There's no easy way to get through this......you've just got to put in the hard work.

Enjoy the ocean!  And revel in the thought that you are taking your life back!

Cris~

[6stringrock]

Working on day 3 and I'm having a hard time. Just got out for a little bit and took a walk down by the beach. Thinking about getting away for a couple of days and renting a room on the beach so I can get some sun and breathe in some gulf air. I only live about 20 minutes away but would be nice to sit out side and listen to the water...especially at night when I cant sleep. I'm trying to keep the saying in the back of my mind...this to shall pass.

[Cris718]

awwwww......you flushed??  lol  Good for you......

Well the next 4 days or so are going to be misreable to say the least.  The best advice I can give you, is get out and excercise, even if I didn't feel like it, I made myself do it.  I do believe it's my new addiction.

I did go to the doctor, and he gave me Klonopin and Clonodine for the first 5 days of withdrawl.  It did help.  I believe an after care program would help a lot.

Just know......so so so very proud of you.  I took all mine in a blaze of glory....(not to smart)  I know........

But I hope to offer you some comfort that it does get better.....:)  I'm in 17 days now, and I am "finding" me again..........and I kinda like me again.....totally worth it.

Hollar if you need anything......we're all pulling here for you!!!!

Cris~

[6stringrock]

Still feeling miserable. Starting to feel like I need a plan. Anxiety is starting to set in about how I'm going to keep myself on the up and up. Flushing the pills gave me a little momentum but time is just draggin. Tommorrow at 12 noon will be 48 hrs. Think I will check out some after care.

[pattifan]

I'd just like to say really well done on going through with the flush!

Make the most of that support that's around you.

Many of us on the list have been through the exact same thing and our thoughts will stay with you.

Keep strong and keep going!

[6stringrock]

Yeah they are gone...I ended up flushing them. After they went down I had a moment of wanting to jump in the toilet and grab them. Then I mourned the loss of them. I'm miserable today. I've been very nauseas all day yesterday and today and was throwing up last night. I don't know as that I have a plan. I know that I definately don't want any pills. I'm actually not even craving them which is odd. I have alot of support around me. I never thought I would hear myself say that I'm looking forward to reuniting with me...I've missed me. I'm still a little fogged.

[Cris718]

so are they gone??  If they are, what's the plan?  Please know we are all here for you.

ok......I have to know.....how did you take them out?  lol  I would love to think it was some dramatic event.  I would even enjoy just pulling out my 20 gauge pink shotgun and just blowing them to pieces.....hey...it'd be good target practice!!

Hope your well........

Cris~

[LeaAnn807]

Great!  Get rid of them, and get your life back.  And NO sub for life.  Talk about a baaaaad detox!  Wheeeeew....NO thank you!

I flushed some tramadol that I found in my dryer after I had dried some clothes.  I didn't know it contaminated the water.......guess there are some energetic fish out there somewhere! LOL  Kidding.

I'm really proud of you.  You can do this!!! : )

[vicki595]

Hey!!   Good for you!   Suboxone for life???  OMG!! Now that's a money maker!!!

Pour bleach over the pills,stir swiftly and flush!! No problem!!

Take care!

Vicki

[mellie4]

I know I've been told to not flush medications but to grind them up and mix them in with coffee grounds (not sure why.)  When my mom died and the hospice nurse came, she flushed all the liquid medications, and crushed and dumped the pills mixed with coffee grounds.

[6stringrock]

I guess that is true...lol...I always thought stuff like that got into the water system. Where did you catch that fish? I live in Florida also.

[laurel453]

hey, congrats on your decision and good luck now :)

[this_big]

The pharm will tell you to flush them. I dont think you have to worry about contaminates in the water..theres alot worse stuff that goes down the toilet..lol. Good luck man.

[shiningstar500]

Good luck to you and you sound like you have your mind made up! That will help so much with getting through this!!!! Take care!