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1318592 tn?1274252058

Can anybody relate?

I am new to this site and quite nervous. I hope I am in the right place.  I have been addicted to ADD medication since I was 14 years old.  I am 33 years old now and my addiction is quite possibly dangerously out of control.  I don't know if this is the appropriate place to post my story but to summarize what has been happening in the past 5 months that is scaring the daylights out of me is that I have been staying awake for 72 hours at a time and sleeping for 2 days straight if possible.  I suddenly started chewing up my pills and I honestly don't know how many I am taking since I just take a bite of them approx. every hour to hour and 1/2. I have become a complete introvert and usually just stay up all night staring at a computer screen like a zombie. My memory has become short, I have no ability to focus or communicate effectively with others. My behavior has become erratic and my mood swings unmanagable.  I am developing noticeable rashes around my neck and my skin has a reddish tone.  I am not sure exactly how or why I got to this point but I can not stop popping these pills.  I hold a full time job as an accounting asst. and a buyer in a professional office but I can no longer hide this addiction as I have my whole life.  I desperately need help but just started this job 7 months ago and am not quite sure they would understand I need to leave for addiction treatment.  I guess for the moment I am looking for other people with the same problem to talk to.  I sure could use some advice.
5 Responses
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401095 tn?1351391770
UR DOC is Ritilin i think???
They claim there is no phuysical wd with stimulants like cocaine, speed, CM, cocaine..but the mental can be awful..and that is the hardest part for all narcotic users too as a rule.
U may need to talk with ur dr..i would and see if he can help u....there are drugs that r safe that can help u stop without as much discomfort...aftercare is important..either AA or NA works..I like AA...or a counselor if u have the insurance or cash to pay one.  posting here is good but not the same as true aftercare for most.
Big step is admitting u have a problem and wanting to stop the madness....if u put ur mind to it and really want to stop this...u can!

Sometimes just forcing urself not to chew one today could help..swallow so u dont get the fast buzz...if u can control the chewing today it would be a start....tapering isnt really necessary for amphetamines but it could help as u say ur dose is high,,,,u may need help thos cos addiction can be very compulsive.
keep posting
Helpful - 0
271792 tn?1334979657
I am glad you found this site as well and welcome. You are safe here and among people who understand.

I am very glad to hear that you took the first step and admitted to your addiction. I think in your case an in-patient treatment center is an excellent idea. If you have the insurance to do so, I highly recommend it. If you do not have insurance, we can discuss that as well.

I know it is easy for me to say but the job is the least of your worries. If you lose YOU, there will be no job anyway. Besides, you would be surprised how employers are prepared these days. Of course the chance is there that you will lose your job but there will be others. In case you are wondering, you are protected under the HIPPA Act and any future employee cannot access your medical records so now is a good a time as any.

You have a life-long disease that has progressed over the past 19 years. Now is the time to deal with it.

I hope you continue to post here and listen to what other members have to say and I also hope you get the help you need.

Best to you.
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Glad you posted and welcome, it sounds like you know you have a problem which is good.
Have you given any thought to speaking with you doctor about what
is going on and asking him how you can safely stop. In the meantime go to an AA or NA meeting daily they really help alot
luck to you,
Becca
Helpful - 0
1318592 tn?1274252058
Currently I am prescribed Methylin 20 mg 3 x daily.  Not sure how many I am actually taking anymore.  I bite them in half.  I don't count them
Helpful - 0
711224 tn?1344771687
Hi Vmoore and Welcome:)
You are at the right place and I'm so glad you found us. This is a great forum with a lot of support.
In order for us to help you, can you tell what you're taking, how much and for how long? I don't mean to be nosy but there's so much dope out there...
Hang in there, you can do this, we're all here to help.
xoxoxo. Sophie.
Helpful - 0
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