Danger?

[Bane2326]

I am a 30 year old man that weighs 155 pounds. I have battled addiction to hydrocodone for roughly 8 years. Recently I have been making a concerted effort to get clean. However, I backslid 2 days ago and snorted probably 150 mg worth and 10540mg worth of acetaminophen. I've done more then that many times over the course of my time doing em, so I have a high tolerance. But I had been clean for 2 weeks before this. Also, does anyone know any free programs that may be able to help me? I sincerely want to be done with this.

[Mintyfresh79]

Hey Bane, just wanted to check up on and see how you're doing?

[kyle505]

PS - didn't mean to include dealer in your support system; but, if that's how you get your meds, that person should be the first one you tell to get lost, and then delete any reference.

[kyle505]

The question is, are you quitting because it's time, or are you quitting because you've run out of meds?  An eight year run means that your detox will be very hard, and if you still have sources - if you can get your hands on meds - then the odds are that you will relapse.
It is all up to you; the best program in the world will be a waste of time IF you aren't ready.  In addition to a "program", you have to cut all sources. During the early days of detox, your head will be screaming at you to use. The voice will say things like "just one won't hurt; just one and I can get some rest; just one to help me relax then I'll be able to do this".  Granted, the physical side of detox can be hell, but the mental side is MUCH harder and is what leads us to relapse in the end.  You also need to tell your secret. Your doc, dentist, pharmacy, dealer, and family members/loved ones that you trust. These people will be a very important part of your on-going support system. If you don't tell your secret you will use behind it.
So I guess I'm suggesting that you don't just focus on a program; the other two things I mention are also a part of recovery. Leave one out and you'll relapse.
I wish you only the best. I offer the above based on over 15 years of failure.

[CurvC]

You can do it darlin! Just keep reminding yourself that there is light at the end of the tunnel!!! Today is day 6 for me off of suboxone and I feel better today than I did yesterday; once you get through the most uncomfortable part you can look at life in a new light!

[Sober07]

Have you thought about confiding in your priest/pastor/preacher? It may be a good outlet and you'll have someone to go to when you feel weak.

[HookLineandSinker68]

My sons friend did the same thing, quit out of her system.. Took a large amount that her body was once  used to and her funeral was a year ago. ... Meant was once used to.  Sorry

[HookLineandSinker68]

My sons friend did the same thing, quit out of her system.. Took a large amount that her body was used to and her funeral was a year ago.

[Bane2326]

Thank you all for your kind words and your advice. I am now completely out of all medicine and am gonna lock myself in the house for the next few weeks. The only time ill come out will be to attend meetings and church. As the one person said, even with a tolerance the things I have done are ridiculous. I am kicking this before its too late. Its too easy for anyone to make a mistake and go too far. Anyway I just wanted to thank you all for taking the time to try and help me, I appreciate it.

[meegWpaw]

Bane, I don't know exactly what to say about programs, I know I've been trying NA for some time and I do have conflicts about it.  I agree with Minty though you can just sit in meetings and not even say anything and generally that does help.  In terms of the title of your post, yes to me it sounds like you are putting yourself in a dangerous position.  I never snorted opiates but it sounds like a lot even if you do have a tolerance, and you've been abusing drugs for a long time.  Don't let it get longer.  You are young, and you have a lot of life ahead of you.  Do something about the problem now!  You will be so glad you did.

[Mintyfresh79]

Hi there and congrats on 2 weeks clean! Try not to beat yourself up about the backslide. It happens. It just means that you need to take a different approach and as the others said NA and AA would be a great first step. I snorted Vic's more than a few times and wow does that **** sting. It's really terrible for the nostrils too.

I tried quitting lots of times just through willpower alone and the most I could make it was 2 months. I realized now that I needed the help of others. Going to meetings and if all you do is sit there and listen to other people story then you will take something beneficial out of it. I figured I had nothing to lose by going to those meetings.

[CurvC]

There are always programs in major city's for 3 day detox that is state-funded. I personally graduated up from percs to methadone to morphine to suboxone to get off and then heroin. Today is my 6th day clean off of everything. Ween yourself down if you think you can do it on your own. I had anxiety medication to take off the edge but I don't necessarily recommend that for everyone because I wouldn't want anyone to switch one addiction for another. Do some research and see what you can find state-funded if you don't think you can handle it on your own. Keep your head up, you can make it through!

[CATUF]

there are two great and completely free programs that have helped millions of people with the disease of addiction . . . AA and NA.  if you sincerely want to be done with this, find out where the meetings in your area are and go to at least one meeting a day for the next 90 days.  you typically have to go to a lot of different meetings to find the one that are a good fit for you.

my drinking problems (last actively drinking almost 25 years ago) were mild compared to my more recent active drug addiction.  however, i found that AA was a better fit for me than NA, and i've been averaging 4 or 5 meetings a week for years.

you can start this minute by doing two things: 1) start reading AA's Big Book and NA's Basic Text (both are on-line); 2) search for meetings near you and go to your first meeting today; and 3) don't use today, at all, no matter what.

CATUF
2776