Day one withdrawal.

[mommy1414]

To the whole page- I just read everything on this page. I am on day one of withdrawal. problem is- I cannot tell ANYONE close to me (Family, Husband, parents, friends...) Almost a year ago- I went voluntarilly into an outpatient rehab that fit into my work schedule. (My son is now 18 1/2 months) And was on Suboxone from July through the end December. Then my insurance changed to a high dedectible plan, and the Sub's were $600 a month. So- I was good for a month- then went back on pills. Lots of pills. Hydros...Oxy's, whatever i could get my hands on. At least 120 a day. and these were the 10 mg. I have a HUGE tolerance. SO-it's day one. I have a full bottle of clonodine. I have to work everyday. And take care of my son at night. Any suggestions? Other than diareah...nothing too bad yet. I do have some ambien for the nights my husband is home. He works nights. This is it. I need to do it this time!! HELP!!!!

[akitagurl12]

First of all congratulations on taking the pludge and quitting!  The days and even weeks I planned on quitting were really stressful for me and honestly worse then the actual detox.  I couldn't tell anyone either, because everyone already thought I quit last year after I went into a rehab.  The same thing with the subs, as soon as I stopped those, I went right back to vicodin.  So for me cold turkey was the only way.  What helped me the most besides this website, was making sure I couldn't get anymore.  I had to confront my supplier which wasn't very pretty because he only cares about my money.  But once that was dealt with, it eased my mind into accepting the detox because I knew it wasn't going to be so easy for me to buy pills now.  Also, just giving myself permission to be sick and not be too demanding on myself helped also.  You will feel much better pretty quickly.  Keep posting and reading, it has been a lifesaver for me.  

[mommy1414]

Thank you for all the support and wise words everybody!! I will keepo checking in!!!

[Pat1956100]

I think you will find that you will get alot of empathy from this forum.  We have all been there and done that.  None of us wanted to become addicted to painkillers and we all understand how hard it is to beat this.
Keep posting and keep trying, that's what I'm doing.  I have come a long way but still have a ways to go.  Minn will give you excellent advice.
If you haven't read the Thomas Recipe, there are lots of tips from it.
Pat

[mommy1414]

You are so right. It was DRY. Now I am not...I am dertermined...Not sure I sould ween down instead of just cold turkey....

[Joycemac]

And the suggestion of having a plan first is better on so many levels. As it is the addiction has dictated even when you quit. I'm guessing you're doing this now because your source is dry at the moment. If you can still find some and the money I would plan it out as suggested. As it is right now you could go through your helpers and be back at square one with no clonodine or ambient.

[Joycemac]

Wow! You're a better woman than me...younger too. I would have adivant handy and alcohol for the times I ran out. I would always say the next time I run out I'm quitting. It never worked that way. This time I went to check out suboxone with 55 pills on me. I have been on suboxone for about 3 weeks now. I don't look at this as my battle being over. It's not over until I'm off everything. If you think you can do it with the help you have at hand go for it. I hate to sound like a doomsayers but it's going to be rough to do this on the DL with clonodine and a few ambien.

[Sharon0255]

Totally agree with Minn you need to try and get to the end og your week if you can. Everyone gets the flu and has to miss work sometime. As far as not telling anyone I was in the same boat as you no one in my family could know and that was doable for me.
Not sure what you do for work but like Minn said i was in work a couple times on day 3 or 4.

Keep posting you can do this.

[minn66]

Oh, I just reread and saw that you already started. Stock up on as many of the vitamins and supplements listed in the Thomas recipe as possible, especially the Immodium. Also keep hydrated with Gatorade or something like that to replenish what comes out ;)

Hugs,

Minn

[shortstopmvp]

You put yourself in this situation girl and now you must get yourself out of it.  Just some words of advice, the more you think about your WDs, the worse they are going to be.  It sounds like you "may" want to quit for good but if there is even a doubt in your mind, I suggest going to work and experiencing this hell so the next time you are tempted, you can think back and remember how bad it was.  You will get no sympathy here...just support to quit.  Your little baby and husband do not deserve this so you have made the right choice.  Take your vitamins, drink plenty of fluids, try and eat & keep yourself moving so you're just not sitting around "thinking" about what WD event is next.  I always got mad at myself for putting my body through this and it helped in beating this sickness.  Good luck!

[minn66]

Hi and welcome to the forum. You've been through the withdrawal before so you pretty much know what to expect. Not trying to discourage you by any means, yet withdrawing from such a high amount and working will be quite a challenge. Sometimes people don't have bad withdrawal so it is possible you will be one of them. My suggestion is to stop one day before your next off day or days. That way you will at least be able to get some rest before going back to work on day 3 or 4. I went back on day 4 and it was hard but I did it with the awesome people here talking me through it.

Best of luck and do keep posting.

Hugs,

Minn

[Pat1956100]

I don't know how anyone can go to work while withdrawing but people have done it.  Can you say you have the flu and get some time off?  You seem determined and that is the main thing.