Day 6 and still hanging on....

[roxmom]

Today I feel better than last night, last night was tough for some reason. I started to have alot of the hot flashes and cold sweats. I think maybe the w/d were just trying to creep up on me or something, cause I had been doing pretty well without them. I am still taking the 4mg Sub twice a day, and its going well. I think day 2 through 4 were the toughest, only because thats hen the RLS hit me hard and and anxiety too, that was hard to deal with. Last night I just felt a bit depressed for some reason and I felt like "I needed a pill", but I knew it was in my head. Funny how that works, but it was like my mind was wanting one. Anyhow, today I feel better. Tomorrow will be one week! Cant believe I have even made it this far! Its a totally good feeling! I feel so alive. I feel like all my senses are back. I see clearer, I smell better, my mind is straight, didnt even know all these senses were gone! Its scary. The ONLY thing that makes me upset, is the people that have been rude, like my sister and a good friend of mine. I thought they would be proud of me and my b/f finally being clean, but its like they are just saying, "they wont last", and yea right, "they are not clean". My sister has been on pills for over 10 years, and my friend is the one we were buying them from, but she uses as well. I think they must be jealous, but why cant they just say Im proud of you! Why cant they be happy for us, instead they just say we will fail. All I know is that there is absolutely no turning back and I am happier now than I have ever been in the last 4-5 years!  Thanks to all the support I have here!

[gizzy32]

It is sad when others want you to fail, I think that happens to a lot of us when we clean up and leave old friends behind or so called friends. Your both doing great and should be proud. I do hope the sub is used short term though. Congrats, you sound so positive and happy.

[Ella789]

Yes, they are jealous you are right.  See, u are thinking clearer now and you realize things more.  It's gona be alright. Stick to your plan, you need support then come here and post.  We know how it feels so good to be free and the others won't until it is their turn to give it up.  It's just a matter of time, no one flys for free and they won;t either!! You are smart, stick to your grit and get this done cause you can do it!!!!!!!!

Hugs to you cause I know you need'em

Ella789

[mojorisin64]

yeah they are thnking that if you have a problem then they do too,i remember when my source went to rehab and she quit i was thinking how its gonna suck for her not being able to get high anymore...but now i am on the other end and love being free...you are doing good,i wasnt on the suboxone stuff,i didnt want to tell my dr but i also knew i would just abuse that since thats what i did with pills...isnt it great to have your senses back,i remember laughing one time and it was so weird cause im sure i laughed while using but i never felt it you know?? hope you don't mind my rambling...its FINALLY warm out here and im in a great mood...its nice to feel moods now too lol

[roxmom]

no plan really, Im just hoping to taper off within 30 days, Im going to try to get down 1 or 2mg less each week. I seriously do not want to be on the Sub longer than 30-45 days tops.

[cathy5841]

good for you girl...they cant be happy for you because they are jealous.  and time will prove them wrong...before long they will be wishing they were you...hang in there and keep up the fight.  do you have a plan to get off the sub??