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452063 tn?1324074916

Have not used for weeks but have large bottle of pills in the cabinet....

This is something that was commented on by folks responding to several recent posts and has been  addressed by many others on threads as well. I have been seeing so many of these statements I thought it was in need of it's own thread.

For all of you withdrawling from opiates. Get rid of any form of opiate in your home. Even cough syrup w codine regardless of whether you ever used it or not. Keeping it there is pointless if your plan is to stay sober. You may feel strong enough to be with them now but they are going to get you big time. I you feel that you want them as a means to prove you are stronger and more in control than the pills you are playing with a loaded gun. Your fight is with your addiction not the pills and you don't have to prove anything. Just focus on staying clean. One member even posted that she dumped her childs cough syrup and felt guilty. I think what she did was incredibly smart. You can get otc cough syrup and having a sober mom was the better for her child than cough syrup. Sure we are going to come into contact with pills during our life but we need to handle that when and if  it happens.

If you are making the decision to get clean and stay that way and you have MDs who give you scripts every month call and get those scripts stopped now. Most of you who have these scripts out there will get them filled as soon as they're due and relapse.

I can't count the number of people who have come on here and done really well and were so sincere and proud of thier progress with there recovery and said that they were starting to feel so much better and then thier script was due and they were never heard from again.

I respect that everyone has a right to do what they want and noone likes to be told that what they are doing is not best for them by a stranger....esp. us addicts lol. But this is a drug abuse forum for people who want to recover and I for one have more experience with relapse than I can count. This is just my way of passing on to all of you what I have learned during my battle. I'm on week 8....again and I don't want to use ever again. If I had a pill in front of me right now...I'd take it and I am by no means a weak person. I'm a strong person with a strong, sly addiction that is always trying to be one step ahead of me.
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495284 tn?1333894042
COMMUNITY LEADER
I threw everything i had during my withdrawals and that was the best thing i did.  As you said this is a sly addiction.  Thanks for the post and congrats on week 8!!!!
Helpful - 0
401095 tn?1351391770
The funny thing for me is this compulsion to take a pill did not occur until after i was clean for a while...during and right after detox..i coulda left them sitting there and not touched them as i was so sick of the whole thing..then i think i started feeling a bit "big headed" about the pills...like...maybe i can just use them for a day or two here and there for my back and the energy they give me....like i had it licked....i guess for me it will never be "licked"   i dont think i will ever be able to casually use for pain or energy again...done deal for me as either i guess i am just the "addict type" personality or i took it too far and screwed it up for life...oh well
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Yes. I dumped over 300 when I started. New script arrived in mail, couple of weeks later. Dumped them as well, 120. I agree, don't keep them around you. But if you have a confrontation with them, have the strength (that's more than possible) and the good sense to get rid of them.

cj
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446097 tn?1223694666
worried,  great point... I know I am in a "stong feeling" phase of detox but I really think I will be able to have them around and not use them.... probably not ;-)
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Avatar universal
Just another reason why recovering addicts shouldn't have them around. If "just happen to have" a few lying around, and ask this forum if it's OK to take them, for any reason, the answer should be a resounding NO!! If you need help that bad, go to a doctor, like normal folks do. That's where we're trying to get, is it not? Some semblance of normalcy?  
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
great post..I agree.! Keeping them around doesn't really prove much except that when you relapse..if ever..then it just makes it all the easier..My own personal opinion is that would be torture for me..It's bad enough knowing my husband has them..He does not keep them in sight or even in the house..
Corey- I really like your last sentence of your post..well said..
Helpful - 0
452063 tn?1324074916
Worried- That's what happened to me twice with 3 months clean and once with 4 months. I felt strong and thought the temptation phase was over. Problem is it's not a phase. I always make it through the physical part and first few weeks feeling like I will never use. It goes away even after months and for some years. I guess some will have to learn that the hard way like I did..but wish I would have known more then.

Dominosarah and CJ-You did the right thing. I was following your posts CJ and was glad you listened to the advice everyone gave you. Your a smart guy.

SFgirl-I hope that you are right and wish you all the best but I hope you reconcider and flush those puppies more. It can only have a positive outcome.

Sad-great to hear from you-Hope your back is feeling better. Glad your husband keeps them away. Its funny but I've been divorced for 17 years and back in the day when we used casually...mostly amphetamines mine used to hide his cause I'd use mine up faster. I always found them when I wanted to. It was like a radar in me that they just called out to. I'd fill half his caps with flour lol. Sometimes he knew and the fights that caused. Just a memory...it's over now.
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
My back is still hurting but not near like it was..thank God for that..i just have to be really on guard. i am supposed to go see a back Dr. next month. it definately has taken a turn for the worse but I still don't think I would get surgery..i am going to check out all options before that..Thanks for asking...
yeah the husband keeps them away..locked at work..it was hard to deal with at first..but they are all aorund me..not physically but everyone i know seems to have them etc..so..I have to stick to my guns..I hope your having a great weekend..
Helpful - 0
477746 tn?1254784547
I came to the same conclusion... but for the addict in me that forever questions when it *might* or *will* be an issue as part of an emergency, I came up with a plan or guidelines for myself:

1. *Only* under the supervision of a doctor. No ifs ands or buts. 2. Said doctor has been informed of my complete history with addiction. 3. That anything prescribed be an alternative to an opiate, or if not possible - no refills and only a minimum amount prescribed. 4. Said doctor has been informed of my complete history with addiction. 5. Said doctor has been informed of my complete history with addiction. 6. If I place special emphasis on numbers 2, 4, and 5.

Maybe not the best solution, but it did away with the thinking that I should keep something around just in case...
Helpful - 0
401095 tn?1351391770
Yes..to me it is kinda like when i used to try to quit smoking as it took me several attempts...would stay quit for a year and start back/sounds kinda familiar dont it/anyway towards the end i would not tell anyone i was quitting so i did not have to listen to them bit(h at me when i started back...s o i guess i had not really made my mind up to really QUIT...i was leaving a door open
Helpful - 0
452063 tn?1324074916
OK Sable, You really had me going reading that one. Thought you just developed a memory problem lol. I have to schedule oral surgery this week for a apicectomy sp?. Basicly the root of my tooth is reabsorbing itself and they need to cut my gum open, take part of the root off and stitch my  gum back up. I plan to tell them I have a problem with opiates and don't want them perscribed when I call to schedule the appointment. Don't know what thet can give me but I'm sure I'll be in pain. I can already feel the addict in me getting it's underoos in a knot and trying to keep me from doing it. So far the thoughts are saying Wait till you get there to tell them my sweet.AHHHHHH. What a monster. I think I will be able to live with the pan and if I just get a few pills it will fuel the fire at this stage of my recovery.

Worried-I remember when I quit smoking I had heard a few times get rid of all of your smoking stuff....cig case, lighters and ashtray ect. I couldn't do that for years let alone try to quit. One day after the very grim diagnosis of a young coworker of inoperable lung Ca, I just quit...used nicorette but didn't plan to quit. Something just came over me and it felt like if I smoked 1 more time I would meet the same fate. I wish that would happen with drugs. I never wanted another smoke again.
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
you are so right.  I personally delivered a letter to every doctor in my town about my addiction so they would know not to prescribe anything for me.    I was having a very difficult week a while back and called one of them about something.  She gently reminded me about my note and did not call anything in.  I tried to make an excuse for it, but she said once it is put in the  chart it is impossible to change.  I made it through that rough spell and now I thank God that she was in my corner.
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Your Dr. can and should, if asked give you another shot to numb your mouth and if your timing is right as soon as that one is beginning to wear off he/she will give another.

Just a thought, I did it and it worked out O.K.
Helpful - 0
488766 tn?1306105169
This time i know it`s you lol and you said this great! I went to the pharmacy and said no more and told the doc`s office.Just "knowing" those options are gone make it alittle easier .
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Corey,

You have said everything I have wanted to say and have been saying to others for so long out here.  I have always from the beginning told people that I am not gifted with words, and am very misunderstood.  You said it all and said it so beautifully.  Corey, you are awesome!!  

There are just some things I know.  I've always been an intuitive person.  I got it from my mother......I hated her in my younger years, but now see it as a gift.  I am going to out on a limb and question......Im gonna get shot for this, but I think the reason you posted and posted so well is because you are speaking from the heart .....meaning experience.....I will leave it at that.

Thank you for you posting.  I know that it made many think, because I believe that a lot of people out here claiming they are clean are not.  I am not judge or jury....It is what it is.......before I put the ole foot in mouth.........thank you for your post.  It was a breath of fresh air.

To all on this forum who are or not using.......we all belong here.  If  you choose to continue to use in silence or in your own private hell, don't ever feel that you are not worthy of the forum.  I don't care what anyone says.......This is an addiction forum and it doesnt matter whether your using or not......just not promoting using.  That is not appropriate.

I would like to say the percentage of people that post regularly who claim they are clean, but are really not.......I don't have the right to do that, but I can say......there are a lot of them..........

Corey.....thank you again for your post !!!

Luv,
Nauty....................
Helpful - 0
452063 tn?1324074916
Addict- Thanks for the advise. I will ask for the second shot

Brad and Sue you both did the right thing. Having access to them makes preventing relapse when hit with a craving too easy. Glad you remember me now Brad. Day 35 right?

Naughty-So glad to see you back. Great picture. You are very pretty. Your right in the sense that I have relapsed many times. As I've always posted way over a dozen. I relapsed my first week on the forum and posted and in 8 weeks since had 1 time when I took a few Darvocet but am clean as a whistle other than that. I wouldn't post wo saying I was using if I was because that seems to defeat the whole purpose of letting others support me through this which is why I'm here. If I can help others with the mistakes I have made I try to. I hope if others are still using that they post and are open about it. They will not resolve anything if they continue to use and are just pretending to be clean. Stop by more often. I missed your posts. Corey

Sad- so happy your back feels better for now. Hope it stays that way. I was diagnosed with spinal stenosis and have a bulging disc but its not causing too much of a problem yet. Something to look forward to though. I might go with the spinal blocks but my Dr said therapy would help. Since I am a therapist I know what exercises to do but I think she also meant ultrasound. So far the exercises help. Back pain can be devestating.
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
I will have 2 months clean on June 2nd.

I used vic's for so long that w/drawal was so hard and so long.

The only thing I haven't done yet is flush the big bottle I still have and all the "stashes" in my drawers etc.

I think I'm afraid to look at them. I haven't even LOOKED at that bottle in the back of my desk since I quit.
Helpful - 0
452063 tn?1324074916
Sarah Congratulations on 2 months clean. Having those pills in your house is still really risky...even with 2 months. If your afraid to look at them that should tell you something.
If you can't go pick up the bottle tell someone else where they are and have them do it. There is no reason to keep them around now. You will never have to worry about taking one when an overwhelming craving hits you if they are gone. You can sill relapse easily after 2 months. I did 3 times. Just ask yourself if their going to stay there for the rest of your life. They gotta go sometime and you should decide HOW they go while you are stronger. Hope you flush. Corey
Helpful - 0
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