Also, i am about to go to the emergency room cause it's saturday and doctors isnt open to see if i can get some clonidine!
Hi Jeff Welcome back, It sounds like you know what you need to do to get thru this, what are you going to do differently once the wd is over ? We always think we can control it but we never can I'm glad you made it out this time with your life. Congrats on almost 10 hours !! I hope they give you the clonidine and remember to stay hydrated ! lesa
Take a deep breath and say "I will get through this". Some of us used for years and years before we got the message you received in a few months. That being life is not better on this little pill. Kudos on that realization.I am like you I would start wd's after only 6 hours from last use. But hours turn into days and days to weeks! Today is day 13 for me and I am still taking it hour by hour. You say you know the worst is yet to come but remember its the mental that can drive you crazy most of the time. Congrats on day 1 Keep Positive and remember You Can Do This!
hey guys, thanks for the responses...sorry about the delayed response, i went to the hospital and they held me there for 6 hours!! I did get clonidine, and it helped me while i was there, however it is wearing off. I took another now, she gave me a prescription.
I am through 13 hours exactly which is still NOTHING! As I said before, however, it is better than 8.5. I was just laying in bed after a hot shower and really got the "creepy crawlies" (RSD). I got up and came down to check. I will be on more frequently tomorrow as I am sure it will be the worst of the days. I am literally just PRAYING for Tuesday morning so I will feel a little better. THIS *****!
I made an hour countdown sheet as each one goes by. I am trying not to pay attention to it because i dont want to stare at the clock but its fun to do and i love crossing those numbers off!
To answer your question 10356, i have already deleted my contacts number so i cannot contact him. He will probalby call tomorrow but i am going to tell him no more pills. He actually is a normal guy and will 100% respect that and he really wont call anymore. Thats where I am starting. Right now i am just so concerned with getting through this!!
THANKS AND KEEP COMING AND HELPING, I LOVE READING AND REPLYING!!! AHHHH THIS *****, NEVER AGAIN!!!
I loved counting the hours off too. I used to plan to feel miserable for 72 hours and as each hour went by I felt like I had accomplished something. It doesn't work for everyone but it helped me.
Make sure you are staying hydrated and take hot baths if the creepy crawlies get bad.
Keep posting and telling yourself you will do this.
Hi there. I just wanted to add my support. It sounds like you know the drill here and know what to expect. The only advice I can offer you is to try to keep your mind as occupied as possible. It's great to count the days and feel a sense of accomplishment, but in the beginning those days go by SO slow! Counting the hours and 'clock watching' about did me in, so I did anything and everything to stay busy. It really helped. Other than that just evaluate your recovery plan and fix whatever needs fixing. Try to find what might have led to your relapse and make steps to prevent the same thing from happening again. Congrats to you on making it to day 2! Take care of yourself and keep up the fight.
It's REALLY difficult the first 3 days! I'm opiate, oxy addict too, it took 4 days for me to get over the watery eyes, runny nose, nausea and vomiting, flushed face etc. Now going into day 7 and the chills and cold sweats have just let up. You CAN get there!
Thank u everyone!! U guys r truely so much help. Well I'm over 24 hours!! I was on and off with sleep and maybe got 4 hrs total. I am still in bed. Had a few crackers earlier but it came right out 30 min later. Ugh.
I just keep thinking about getting to tomorrow morning then Tuesday morning. I agree about that 72 hour mark. That's a big place and yes usually when a lot will subside. If I can get through today I think ill be ok. I'm taking off work tomorrow but will try to go back Tuesday. That could change but that's the plan. Talk soon!!
Keep the mind distracted...listen to music, watch funny movies, read, post. Stay hydrated. Sleep when you can. Move when you can. Sounds like you know the drill. The physical WD's $uck...we've been there. Keep posting when you need to. Stay strong. You have got to fight for you sobriety and getting thru the physical WD is step one. You CAN get thru this...you WILL get thru this!
Hey you're doing great. It sounds like you have your eyes on the prize of freedom and, in my opinion, that's a great thing. I get that happy people generally live in the moment, but who in the hell want's to live in the moment of their w/d?! Not me, so I choose to keep my eyes on all of the positive things that are waiting for me once I get through it, and it seems like you're doing that too. I wanted to add, on top of everything else that has already been suggested, a heating pad helps me with RLS. Ofc there isn't going to be anything that will remove the discomfort, but soothing it with music, hot baths, heating pads etc... are helpful to some degree. Also, if you are doing these things, you feel you are taking some sort of action and it can keep your mind occupied. While in severe w/d, I would often turn the lights out in the bathroom, run the water (fully hot) from the shower and sit down in the tub with the music on. Who hasn't done that right?! I would do it until the water ran out and then I would be more relaxed for a short period of time. Music makes it so much easier to get through, as it provides pleasure, it can be inspirational, and it keeps your mind occupied. Nothing is going to be the magic bullet that your DOC is, but that is way too temporary, and we have to find ways to sooth ourselves.
There is a show I used to watch called "Legend of the Seeker" based on my favorite books by Terry Goodkind called the "Sword of Truth" and there are these characters in there called Banelings who have to kill every 24 hours to stay in their bodies. They accepted a deal from the devil once they died in order to be returned to the world of the living. I always feel like one of those creatures having to dose up every 24 hours in order to participate in life. I am sick of that. I know you are too. Let's get free of this pact we've made with our demon. Let's get to a point where we no longer need this crap to get on with life. There is a price to pay, to be sure, but I know it's so worth it. I hope my story didn't seem convoluted, but it just reminded me of that for whatever reason. Good luck to you friend! I will be looking forward to hearing about your success.
jug- thank you for the tips!! i just killed 2 hours and watched a movie i had on DVR. Was nice. Also took a clonidine at 10:05. Didn't really knock me out like it did a bit last night. I feel so crappy and weak right now. Legs are like dragging cinderblocks. As i am typing i am at exactly 28 hours!! I guess it is better than 8.5 hours i was at when i first posted this message. I am very thankful for you being so positive and the motivational words! It really does help!!
I literally just want to wake up at 7:45am tomorrow and be at 2 full days! That is all I want right now. I am so far away from that though :(
Hey Ban - That was so nice of you to write to me!! I really appreciate your kind words and helpful words. I am trying so hard to stay away!! I have called my guy and told him not to call me anymore and also deleted his number. He 100% understood and agreed. I like that "Legend of the Seeker" comparison. I agree. 24 hours each day we have to do that. Great point made!
Thanks for the heating pad idea, i have one in my closet that i did not use. I am also going to try the music as well tonight. I have been doing hot showers about every 4 hours or so and yes, that is NOTHING better than a COMPLETELY DARK shower!! Did it last night at about 10:30. Unfortunately i have a skylight in their so i cant do it during the day. Showers do help me calm down. I am going to take another one soon, its been 3 hours. I also took immodium a few hours ago. The pooping is out of control! I ate some crackers and it seems to be holding down for now. One hour at a time. I have my hour cross off sheet here that i keep crossing off the hours. I went up to 80 hours. I remember feeling better around 65-70 hours. Not 100% but manageable to work and actually do some things.
Talk soon, keep in touch and thank you!
It's really good to see you back. I don't have much to add right now (I have to pack up my laptop & head to work) but I wanted to let you know that I'll make it a point to see if you're around when I get home after midnight (EST) If you can't sleep, we can talk a bit if you like.
Like my friends above said: You know the drill. Deep Breaths. Hydrate, hydrate, hydrate. Also, I found it easier not to say: 'Oh, this day/hour will be the worst of it. Or, I haven't been through anything yet.' Best to try to distract yourself/redirect if you find yourself obsessing this way or psyching yourself out. Music really works for some folks as do movies, journaling or talking to supportive friends. Time may seem to be crawling right now but I promise you that in retrospect, acute withdrawal will seem like the blink of an eye. ('The only thing to fear is Fear itself.' I'd add that the other thing to fear is NOT getting clean.) You Can Do this, my friend! I'm so glad you've been posting & are planning to use this site for all it's worth. Way to go!!
TENS unit helps with muscle aches!
Evolver, thanks so much for the post!! I agree with everything you have to say. I have started to listen to some music and watch my favorite basketball team, UCONN, play right now! I am really having a hard time right now with everything...starting to break down a bit. Called a few friends to just talk and forget about it and kill some time. I am trying to stay busy and not watch the clock but i become obsessed with it. I hate that. I am going to be taking another clonidine at 40 minutes. Hoping that helps. Im sticking to the doctors orders with those, 1 every 6-8 hours. Right now i am almost at hour number 32. I literally am praying to make it to Tuesday morning, 7:45am. That will be the 3 day mark and im going to go back to work and hopefully feel a lot better other than sleep.
I need you guys right now!!
Thanks so much!!!!
Just want to add my support as well. You got this! You know the drill and what exactly you need to do. Remember that a good portion of the misery of w/ds is a head game, so the more distracted you keep yourself, the better.
The counting off hours thing is great if it helps you, just be cautious not to become overly focused on clock watching. Then you would have gone from clock watching when taking the pills to clock watching when NOT taking them, you know? As long as it's helping you, that's all that matters. If you think at any time it's becoming an obsession, or you feel as though time is dragging more slowly, maybe skip it, or start counting longer intervals (like 4 hours, 8 hours). I know in the world of detox, 8 hours is a lifetime, lol, but I'm sure you understand my point.
Also, please be VERY VERY careful as to how much credit you give your "source" person. He may be a great guy indeed, but at the end of the day, he's still your drug dealer, and he makes money off of you. It's great if he respects your request, but what would happen if you call him, and beg and plead? I guarantee he would hook you up in those situations, so my suggestion is to tell him you're getting clean and then block his number. Getting a new number is even better....just more safeguards to protect you, especially in those very weak moments when you'll move heaven and earth for some relief.
Make sure you're following the dosing instructions on the Immodium package, you will get better results. A lot of people will just take one here and there, versus how they are indicated (one or two after each loose BM until you reach success or until you get to the max dose). Like the others said, stay hydrated as much as you can. With severe diarrhea, you can get dehydrated quickly. Try to eat light foods, small amounts, more frequently than 3 meals a day. As hard as it is, try to get moving a bit too, take a short walk, even if it's around your house once. It WILL help.
You're doing great, keep on truckin', and soon you'll be counting off days, then weeks. You can do this, and we'll be here every step of the way for you while you do!! Congrats on wanting to reclaim your life!
Ha, we were posting at the same time. Not to sound like a broken record, but you said this....
" I am trying to stay busy and not watch the clock but i become obsessed with it. I hate that."
I really think that your hourly checklist may exacerbate your obsession with the clock, and will feel like time is slowing down. If anything, you want to try to FORGET about the time for a while. While I CERTAINLY understand the positive aspect of that, I can see the downfall too, in that you're making yourself very aware of each hour ticking by. That would drive ME mad I can tell you, in any situation!!
Just give that some thought, okay?
Nurse- thank you SO MUCH. Your advise has been seriously amazing and spot on. You are 100% correct about everything, the time, my dealer, and things i need to do. I am drinking a lot of water and some powerade as well. I am at 32 hours right now as i type...not bad....cant wait to say im at 64 hours and double it! I really just want to get to tomorrow.
I am 100% sticking to the clonidine dosage my doctor gave me. 1 every 6 to 8 hours. I usually stick closer to the 6-7 hour side, but i am not going earlier than 6. I am actually able to take one in 15 minutes so that will be good i guess. I am going to go upstairs and fold some clothes and maybe lay down and watch some tv and hopefully kill some time!
Thanks again SOOO much!!
Keep In Touch
I am sitting here so close to hour 36...about 25 minutes away. Excited but at the same time panicking/worrying. I have a annoying pain on my left side underneith my breast (im a male, not sure what else to call it). It is constant and does not let me get confortable at all laying, sitting, or standing.
Anyone ever get this? Will it go away???
I am so nervous about this. Im trying everything...showering, acetaminophen, laying on it...im going to go try a heating pad and see
See you soon, i wish it was tomorrow :(
If you are having upper right quadrant pain, it might be a good idea to take it easy on the acetaminophen. Give your liver a rest. Your body is detoxing & you're bound to feel all sorts of aches & pains as your system tries to readjust. Please, try not to stress b/c the anxiety only heightens the whole thing. There is nothing wrong, what you're going through is completely normal & you are doing wonderfully. Deep breaths my friend. I just wanted to check in on you from work. Gotta' go! Keep up the great work & deep breaths. See you later on ;))
If I had to guess I would say it's probably GI pain. Our intestines and total GI tract slow way down when on opiates. Once we quit everything starts going nuts for a bit, thus the diarrhea and cramping. It also might be an anxiety issue too. I fully agree with Evolver... try to take some deep breaths and do something to take your mind off of the here and now. Listen to some music, take a nice hot bath, watch a comedy. Stressing and panicking only makes you feel worse. Hang in there and keep pushing through. You'll be out the other side in no time.
If the pain is in the area where your heart would be it is most likely that it is a muscle that is causing the pain. If it were your heart it would be a radiating pain and involve the shoulder and or arm. Try to stay calm friend. You are in a rough time period right now as withdrawal goes.
Hi Jeff, just wanted to chime in and say that you are doing great. Just some tips: don't feel bad about taking the clonidine more towards the 6 hour mark if you think you need it. My only w/d symptom has been some insomnia and I have taken two before I go to sleep at night. I am just telling you what I do and am not telling you to do that. I also keep busy by watching TV, comedies are always really good. Watching movies is a great way to pass the time. I have been eating a lot of carbs and that has really helped. Eating snacks and watching TV has been really fun. Please let us know how you are doing. When do you go back to work?.
Everyone who responded, THANK YOU! The pain is still there, it is on my left side Evolver, not my right. I am continuing to drink alot of water, i had some toast a few hours ago and it held down. I am at hour 37. In about 45 minutes im going to take another hot shower/bath and also take my clonidine and a tylenol PM and try to get a few hours of sleep, i pray!
Tauras, i go back to work tomorrow, but i took the day off. I am going to go back on tuesday if i feel ok monday night....tuesday morning i will be at 72 hours at 7:45 am. Obviously i wont be perfect but i think i will be OK enough to go and i think i want to so i can make time go a bit faster and keep my mind off of it. I just want 9:45 to be here so i can start my nightly routine of shower/clonidine/tyleonl PM and try to sleep.
Wish me luck and THANKS again!!!