I have been clean for 11 1/2 yrs and not everyday is a good one for me but i always remember what one of our members used to say....When your desire to stay clean outweighs your desire to use, you will stay clean. I carry that thought with me everyday. The bad days dont seem so devastating anymore as i know a bad day doesnt equal a bad life. Music is my thing along with my support group. I have learned to reach out when i have a bad day, it holds me accountable. You mentioned above that meditation and hypnosis are soothing so when you are feeling down turn to those things.
Hard days....you must be talking about life on lifes terms....b/c sometimes it SUCKKSSSS!!!! Today, what i do is STOP first (before i kill the people around me). This is something i never used to do. When i was using i was always a big giant reaction waiting to happen. I pray....something again i never used to do. I think the tape through.....will using help this situation in any way??? Will numbing out make this situation better? For a long time i avoided life...today i find it much easier to hit things head on. Not to mention when your high issues and problems are SO OVERBLOWN. You just dont realize this until your not high. Shitry days are just that, ****** days and we all jave them. I use N/A every day, the daily meditation, my sponsor and mu higher power.
In my case , EVERYDAY SEEMS TO BE HARD!! I'm still REALLY STRUGGLING with the benzo withdrawal I have been literally medicating myself which is very hard to do because I cannot find those anywhere but good news I am going to the Charleston Center to get off these things properly Friday