Husband on Percocet

[jlb1019]

My husband admitted to me 2 weeks ago of a Percocet problem he has had for at least a year. He was taking 5 at a time morning and night. I know that for some that may not be a lot but it was for him. I knew he had a problem because it altered his behavior tremendously this past year.  He also has a history of illegal drugs over 10 years ago.  He started taking it because of chronic ankle pain from a ligament tearing. Then he had surgery. His ankle is still in pain and due to have another repair this month. He told me to take the medications he has and keep it from him. He didn't want to be on them no more except when it was time for surgery and then he would wean off them permanently. Well, his surgery got postponed and now he wants them back for the pain. He said his doctor will give him more for after surgery again.  

I don't know what to do. He is the one who asked me to hold them. He now wants me to give him regular doses of it throughout the day for pain. He's been off for 2 weeks now. He had withdrawals for the first 4 days. I just feel that if he gets back on them, they won't be as effective for the pain from surgery. Plus, when you want to truly quit and get off pain meds like he says he does, shouldn't he try to avoid them as much as possible except when absolutely necessary?  He is in pain and I believe him. But it's not like pain that is preventing him from walking or smiling or laughing. It's tolerable. I wish we could talk to an expert to guide him and I. The doctors don't care, they just give him whatever he asks for without telling him the risks. Plus he's in the military and he feels he can't get any real help or he could mess up his career. I just wish we didn't have to deal with this alone. I'm afraid he'll just start lying to me again if I don't give them to him. But I hate how he treats me when he's on the meds. He's so up and down. He's not reliable. He's lazy and he has insomnia and kidney issues when he's on them. He is not affectionate and has no desire to be intimate while taking them. These past 10 days off meds, he's been more attentive, loving, happier and kinder. But suddenly today he's ticked off and moody because I haven't agreed yet to give him his meds again.

[godguidesme]

I have to say your between a rock and a hard place.. But the truth is hes going to get them one way or another, either by hounding you andtearing up the house or by physicay getting them from you, we do alot of things we wouldnt do norally, maybe a compromise you dose him as scheldule, it might not work for long, but ou never know but im a few hours, days, whatever hell prabaly want more, im just preparing you. but definatly dont hold them without giving him any, you dont know what his addiction is capable of. God blss chan

[Girl_Interupted618vygyx]

Hes probably gonna keep hounding you. and he will eventually go elsewhere but one way or another he will get his fix. once you have your mindset, the drive for opiates is the strongest thing I have ever experienced and I have done alot of partying in my days. Just him knowing you have them in your possesion is driving him nuts. you should probably just let him do pain pills until all of the issues with his ankle are over. you guys could compromise and you could control his use. he popbably has a high tolerance though so dont just think you could give him a normal dose. I dont know, you definatley have quite a dilema. Good luck!!!

[tryinhard78]

Hi there, I am sorry you have to go through this...You sound like a great person who loves her husband very much. I hate to say this but if he wants them back that bad you have to give them back. Like Cathy said he is responsble for his recovery. Maybe instead of giving them all to him you could sit down with him and come up with a schedule for him to take them by. You could keep the bottle and only give them to him when its time...That way you don't have to worry about how much he is taking and he has pain relief. I hate to say it but if he is addicted to them he will find a way to get them...Either from you or other means, even if it means tearing the house apart to find them. If he gets mad and desperate enough he could leagally have you arrested...I would hope he wouldn't do that. But because it is his script you cannot leagally with hold them from him even if he asked you to and you are only trying to help him. Good Luck and keep posting here it helps so much.

[cathy5841]

i am sorry to agree with the above post.  he is responsible for his recovery.  if he wants them back give them to him...he is not ready to quit.  when he is ready he will ask for your help again...you didnt cause him to be an addict and you cant fix him either...hopefully he will get serious when he has the surgery, but be prepared for him to make an excuse to keep using.  most of us have to hit rock bottom and lose the things that mean the most before we are finally done for good....even then some choose the drugs over everything...it happens aften...i am not trying to bring you down, just prepare you for reality...addiction hurts those that loves the addict the most.  i am here if you need to talk or vent...keep us posted

[lusty22]

this is tough. i think you should give them to him, if you actually throw them out he will be livid. he's a big boy, let him have them. I know this ***** for you, but if he wants them badly enough he will do just about anything. At least I would. It is addict behaviour like 10356 said. He has to make his own choices. He could always get more at the drs anyway.

[10356]

I would get rid of the meds He has been through wd it has been 10 days If my hubby was holding my doc when I was 10 days out I would have found a way to get them.. Crying, anger even hunting for them.. Classic addict behavior.. You should show him what you wrote and let him read the responses maybe he will see something he has not.. lesa