I Slipped

[steveewonder]

I slipped everyone.  tuesday night. i had to recupertate yesterday. i feel like ****. i was feeling so good!  i'm so disappointed in myself.  i feel like i'll never be able to stop.  like many of you here, i don't sleep at night.  that's when i get really really weak.  any suggestions on how to get to sleep and stay asleep without something that i might become dependent on?

[hopsing94]

Sorry to hear about the slip up. Im sure you not the first nor the last to do that. That does'nt mean give up. Just pick your head up and get going again. For me the only way I can sleep is with a xanax and an ambien at the same time. Not sure this is a good idea  but I have to sleep and i've never had a problem with the xanax or the ambien. I dont take them everyday and have w/d's from them. I may go 1-2 weeks without taking any at all. In the past when i've tried to quit they really helped though--John

[steveewonder]

thanks for your words of encouragement.  it feels good to be able to come to the forum and not be judged.  i know if i were to tell my some of my family members this, they would talk about me amongst each other.  i love you guys so much.  thanks for the tip on sleeping.

[Becca911]

Don't beat yourself up. I myself have slipped many times. I am only on day 4 sober. Just get your mind set that you want to be clean and healthy. For sleep I use benadryl (not sure if I spelled it right) but OC allergy med. Hang in there and don't give up if you want to quit you can do it.
Love, Becca

[hopsing94]

We are here for you. The next couple weeks will be hard for me too. So I hope you stay right here with me and everyone else so we can all get through this.-John

[steveewonder]

thanks john. i will be around.  i see that we all need each other.

[oxynomore07]

I take Trazadone for sleep. It works great and its a mild antidepressant too. I can take it for a couple weeks if i need to then stop with no withdrawls. Ask your doctor about it.

Josh

[SotiredIcantsleep]

Sleep, ha! I just kind of got used to not sleeping a ton, last night was my first night without anything for sleep, back home I scored a couple xanax valiums and ambiens (2 of each) I ate almost everything the first three days and didnt sleep a WINK.(Id sleep for about an hour a day) Today is day 10 and I can say last night was pretty bad, I slept an hour woke up an hour, rinse, repeat throughout the night.  You just gotta get used to it, I know it's hard and insomnia is so lonely but I get a little more each night, they say its the last thing to come back and one of the first signs that you are done with the w/ds.

Don't beat yourself up, I know how tempting it is to pop your pills to get some nice rest, you'll tell yourself itll speed up the recovery process "if only I could sleep".  Don't lie to yourself, the recovery process involves your body learning to sleep on its own.  If you pop tonight to get to sleep you will have to pop tommarow aswell.

It reminds me of a saying my dad always use to say to me growing up,
"Pay me now, or pay me later, but your gonna pay me"

Keep strong..