I got my own account now

[wantnormalagain]

Well that was easier than i thought, i dont know how to transfer our conversation from my moms account to here, so any questions and i will answer them again, i just wanna quit

[wantnormalagain]

I am going to make a new post as per a suggestion from someone to get this one to archives, so we can get rid of the personal stuff

[tgtiffany]

I know what you mean about wanting ANY sort of pill.  It will get somewhat easier over time.  That's good that you are substituting it for something else like that.  Try substituting it for something else that you like to do other than food and see how that works.  I read in another thread in the social addiction community that someone is addicted to writing poetry.  They found their GOOD addiction instead of their bad!!  I think it was ADDICTIONSANITY..?  dont' remember exactly.  But anyway, like Rick said, just Keep on Keeping on!!!

[quitinoxys]

bmdad is right try to figure out what is driving (triggering) your cravings. I myself when I had cravings would workout and/or go fishing. Try to do something that you have a great interest in and the craving will pass. Aftercare is key as it gives you the tools to figure out why you were using, how to handle your triggers and how not to put yourself in a situation that may cause a trigger. As far as being ashamed DON'T as bmdad said "Nobody here will judge as we do not have that right" So keep it up and if you feel a craving just login and post. This forum saved me from my cravings and losing my clean time and we will do it for you too.

[bmdad]

Don't feel ashamed or embarrassed. Nobody here will judge as we don't have the right. Just learn from it and let it go. Wipe the slate clean and focus on your recovery from this point forward.

[sandstone27]

I posted earlier, but it may have gotten lost among the few crazy posts.  You shouldn't feel the least bit embarrassed or ashamed because of what someone else did or said.  In the big picture of your life and your recovery, its just a blip on the radar - gone already.  Stay focused on your recovery and listen to all of the people here who know what they're talking about, as you've been doing.  You will not only recover, but thrive;  I'm sure of it!!

[bmdad]

The key to getting through cravings is by figuring out how to work through them. Some go for a jog, listen to some music, lay in a dark room and breathe, etc. If you sit there during a craving and think about how much you'd like to use then those cravings may not ever get easier. You are far enough through the physical withdrawals that you really need to start putting as much effort as possible into your recovery. Believe it or not, the withdrawals are truly the easy part. Most don't have a problem getting through the first few weeks. As time goes on we tend to forget how horrible the withdrawals were and the addict in us makes us think we can take just a few pills for the night. It doesn't matter how mentally strong we are or how mentally strong we think we are. One pill is all it takes to get right back to where you started. There is no cure for addiction but you can keep it in remission. In order to keep it in remission you have to be willing to put forth a lot of time and hard work. Never ever let your guard down.

So, when you get your next craving, try and figure out what works for you. You want to try and take your mind off of it. Try saddling up a horse and going for a ride. Go for a jog. Lay in a dark room and listen to some music. Just try different things and eventually you will find what works for you. I'm sure others will chime in with what works for them if you need some more ideas.

Never give up the fight. You are so young and have so much to look forward to in life. You are at a huge turning point in your life right now. You don't want to look back twenty years from now wishing you would have paved a different path in life. In order to stay on course you have to put in the work without taking a day off.

Best of luck to you. There is normally someone around day and night so if you ever come close to using, get on here and post. This forum has saved many from a relapse.

You're doing great!



Brian

[wantnormalagain]

I find when i want to i usually grab a glass of milk, or a cookie, i am trying to substutute something for it, in the morning, i eat breakfast now instead of doing one that one works, its the afternoon and worst at around bed...ill try to figure out, if not ill ask, as i always have, you are great people i feel ashamed and embarresed at what happen earlier

[quitinoxys]

That because your brain is crying out to you to take a pill as that use to be your normal routine. Take a breathe this too will pass. You doing great so hang in there.

[wantnormalagain]

I think weird though, my craving isnt for just oxyx or hydros, or an opiod, it seems any pill, i look at asprin and think mmmmm i could do,,,,,,i dont know, the last week, and the week before have been bad

[wantnormalagain]

The only thing that bothers me is everyone incl, my mom used my name, mom apologized as did GMcp for using my name, i cant say nik888 did, but anyways all might as well call me Tyson, since it's out there anyways, other than that i am okay, just a bad mental craving to use, and yes i share with my mom, i think its important she know how i am doing and what i am thinking sometimes , (sorry mom), but today has been bad for the craving, last night was the worst i have had in acouple of days, but they have been there

[wantnormalagain]

I am okay i guess,i have the real urge to use each day, i try to fill my day with lots to do, tons of chores to make up still, so i can keep busy, getting energy back slowly, but can last the day now, no didnt finish the meds the doc gave me, i used i think 3 days, I gave them to mom to hold just so i would do them all, in the event i couldnt sleep or the depression from WD got bad,,,i start the shrink on tues, we will have lots to talk about, thansk for asking and your support

[wantnormalagain]

I just tried there is no button to delete i am sorry, mine as i said wasnt to start anything i was just looking for support,, but i feel so bad now.....and i cant even delete mine, if you wish i will ask to have my account deleted if that would be better you have been here along time and have good advise, i respect what you say

[wantnormalagain]

Hi, this is the owner of the account, it seems my name as been used everywhere, I am so sorry for all this, please accept my apology, iwill just delete my post it wasnt ment to cause problems more for the fact i wanted to use, and looked for support but your right it is unfair to everyone else, I am so sorry, i trully am, i will delete my last two posts now

[wantnormalagain]

I am Tysons Mom, my post got moved to somewhere else and i am sorry you are right, entirely. As for the husband of GMcp i have all the letters she sent him all of them, i will send them to you as i beleive you may not have all the facts, my son did nothing wrong except come here for help and your wife/girlfriend took advantage of his low self esteem right from the start, and said things to him about you that would influance his opinion, this is not the right place, i am on you girlfriends facebook, you can get ahold of me there if you would like, but please no more on here, this site did him alot of good, and with everything goin on because of her, he may need it again, i pray not. She told him 3 days of knowing him she loved him, knowing from this site he had a bad break up, that was unfair.

Karen

[wantnormalagain]

My son got involed to a degree with someone from this site and it seems like she is saying that he caused her to initiate it, I have read his inbox letters, and i don't see that, can anyone on here shed some light on this for me, he is napping but left his computer on, so I simply clicked on this tab, and he was already signed in, and i'm his mother, I am trying to make heads of this some help would be good please. I don't see where my son did anything wrong except confess to an addiction and asnwer people who gave advise.

Karen

[sandstone27]

I know this is irrelevant, but which is it? Boyfriend? Husband?  You refer to both in your most recent post...who's the dishonest one?

[sandstone27]

I've read both your thread and your Moms and haven't posted to either one of them, but when I read your last post, I just really wanted to tell you that you are NOT a sucker.  As the previous posters indicated, you're at a vulnerable time in your life, and if this girl knew it, she should not have taken advantage of the situation.  That being said, and I'm sure you will learn this down the road, you can't let other people's treatment of you dictate how you feel about yourself. Easy to say, but sometimes difficult to do, I know.  You sound like a great person and I'm sure you are. Going forward, you have to know that, and that you are worthy of the very best someone has to offer.  I don't doubt that you will find it.  You've made it through an incredibly difficult time in your life and you should be very proud of that. 7 days clean! Fantastic!!  My best wishes to you.

[wantnormalagain]

I DIDNT use, i wanted to in the worst way but didnt, i trusted someone, and beleived what they told me about how they felt and such.exchanged some pics and well maybe it was dumb but i fell for her, but even though they wrote they loved me i have my doubts now, i understand what your saying, i just cant beleive it all, I stood outsode the place to get some for an hour, but walked away, i dont need them to feel better, yes i do but i dont want to go through that again,,,my trust level is down now, but lesson learned on my part....im a sucker

[wantnormalagain]

Well tonight wen to ****, i didnt use but boy do i want to, and ill leave it at that, I will be on tomorrow for an update, I trusted someone like crazy, now it seems it isnt the same...man i can screw things up fast, my buddy was right, he said meeting someone online never works, and i though it might considering all that was said. oh well enough of my personal stuff, nite all, i will check back in in the morning and let ya know. i will do all not to

[quitinoxys]

Glad to hear you are doing so well. You should be extremely proud of yourself as all here are of you. You are on the road to recovery and remember aftercare is key to that recovery. Staying sober means changing your life to live as a sober person. You have a great attitude and with that and your support system I know you will make it. So stay strong and committed to your recovery and you will make far down the road to a life of sobriety. God Bless---Rick

[wantnormalagain]

I can understand that, If i did it would be with someone who helped me through this, who helped keep me strong, but what you said still makes sense, I never thought of it that way, as it looks now, the other person may change there mind, and your right i thought about it, but didnt do it, but i could see the temptation, s it happened and i am sure it could happen more than once, I will follow your advise, thank you for opening my eyes, i appreciate it, and to you also Tgtiffany, I appreciate your advise also, i will take both to heart and hold on to the advise and be more carefull going forward, i just thought since it was someone who helped me then my chances would be better,,,,guessed wrong

[tgtiffany]

I again with IBKleen 1000000% on that one.  This is not the time for a relationship.  You have to find YOU again and you need time to do that.  Focus needs to be on yourself not someone else or anything else for that matter.  If I were you I would hold off on that for a while yet.  Don't get down, you are through the WDs now you gotta get through all the mental crap Gnarly is always talking about.  Don't go down the wrong road, because it will lead you back to he ll.  Good luck as always :)

[IBKleen]

Glad to see you are hanging in there. That said, I have to be brutally honest---starting a relationship at this point is extremely dangerous. You ned to work on you and get yourself well before you can even entertain having a relationship with someone else.

Relationships early in recovery are a great way to take the focus off of yourself and a great place to lay blame when, or if, things don't work out. Let's say things don't work out, what do you think is going to be the first thing you think of? I can promise you it will be drugs.

You are only a week out of a toxic relationship. Ask yourself if you are really healthy enough yet to get into another one.

Recovery is not about hanging in there. That will get old real quick. Recovery is about change, going forward, and learning. I hope you find it and I wish you well.

[wantnormalagain]

I am doing well physically, but emotionally i realy don't know< i am trying my best and havent used at all, but with diffrent things going on it is tempting, I start therapy tuesday so I hope all goes well there, hope she ccan help with the cravings, i stay busy all day, and it takes my mind off of it, but at night thats the hardest, i am sleeping, somewhat normal, met someone and that has helped but not sure where tat is going now, but it isnt an excuse to use, i know this, one day at a time,i  lost track of that but i got it again, it took Dave to remind me, I amlost forgot I am still an addict just in recovery, its so easy to gorget, Sorry for th elong time to update, i have been talking to someone about it all, but no excuse i should have been comming here anyways, sorry guys, but i will be back daily if i can or at least every other day. Back on track, No i didnt use, Im proud of myself no matter what