Okay... So... I can't tell you what day it is (I mean, I know its friday, but...) I don't know how many days its been.. They have all ran together. I slipped up once! My fiancé brought me two because she could stand seeing me that way. GREAT NEWS, two ACTUALLY worked!! I mean it ACTUALLY took my pain away. Which is huge for me! I am still in A LOT of pain. I'm actually typing this from bed on my phone.... But, I put different clothes on today. I also went down to the hot tub with my girl.... And I took a shower without my body scrubber feeling like it was going to rip my skin off!!! Right now I'm eating lemon cookies... Somehow they taste... Idk... Different? Cigarettes taste like I locked a friggen ASHTRAY, but, they are all I have right now :/. I am starting to feel like that pills have no more control over me. When I took those two the thought of wanting to take more didn't cross my mind at all. As of right now I have none. Which is prob best. I do feel as though dealing with all of this pain and uncomfort is going to help me regulate myself way more and keep the medication as just that, a medicine. I will continue to post and let everyone know how its going. Thank you ALL for your support and care!
Daniel.
OK, so, your doctor is telling you not to stop taking them! You have a real medical condition, with real pain! Well, you can stop abusing them! Would it be possible for your "ol lady" to be able to control your meds? Can you give them to her and have her give them to you ONLY as prescribed, and ONLY to relieve the pain? You will need to taper down, and you will need to stop getting them from other sources! In my opinion, this would be the best option for you! Others will weigh in with more options!
Take care, I'm wishing you all the best!
Oh yeah, and its been almost a year. I was always the type of person that didn't even take an asprin for a headache, you know? And now I just feel so.... Idk... Pathetic? Because I RELY on them TOO much! I can't do ANYTHING but lay in bed in pain when I dont take them...
my doctor said it is natural to become use to them and have the need to up the dosage. I used to do other drugs but was never addicted or habitual with them. I just, idle, DID them and didn't let them do me. I don't know what to do you guys... My doctor said do not stop taking them. I have expressed my concerns, but, he said that my body could go into some state of shock?! Is he serious?! I... idk... I'm so lost!
Yo. Cancer of the kidney sounds too serious to "tough out". I agree with Kyle and I'd add that if you can find an addiction/pain MD (pref one that's a recovering addict), they will have the expertise to help you navigate the difficult waters you sail on. Good luck to you sir.
Sorry if I missed it; how long have you been using? That also has a lot to do with how the detox will go. Since you have a legit medical issue that is causing the pain, you should talk with your doc about what you are doing. Maybe s/he can help. A lot of what you're feeling now, in general, is normal, however the kidney thing - back to what I said about the doc.
There are a few other things that you need to do/put in place, if you want to get off the meds, but first things first. Call your doc.
Well, I have cancer in my kidney, and it causes me a LOT of pain... But not enough to justify the amount of what I am taking... Its 1pm on day 1... Nose is running, eyes are tearing up, back and kidney is KILLING md. In hot then cold then hort again... Everything tastes like ****.... I'm a hot damn meds! I feel like I'm dying!
Keep going brother ~ you can do it ~ it will all be a memory shortly down the line ~ and so worth doing ~ write a list of all the reasons why and leave it out around the house ~ You Can Do This!!!! Just keep remembering that these meds are meant for people that need them, NOT for you!!! Woman give childbirth without meds, you can do this!!! Thankfully you have a supportive girlfriend. Be grateful that this is your time. From a gratefully recovering addict of 12 years. I've never looked back and never really missed the crap , only good things ahead of you, let go and let god.
I can definitely relate to the "I am ok bcuz I am just going to use them for a legit reason"...I started abusing hydro/perc over 8 years ago and stayed abusing for 4 years ...got myself clean and loved it...stayed clean for 3 years ...then while at the gym I screwed up 2 disks in my neck...I went to Dr and ended up needing surgery ...so I said "I need this for real so I can handle it"...from the first script I was hooked again and stayed using for about 1.5 years...I have healed from surgery and kept getting script refilled (my Dr was filling 120 percs every 2 weeks)...I just woke up Monday morning and reached for my pills and before I put it in my mouth I made the decision that enough is enough....I am at the end of day 5 and feel pretty good...even been back in the gym the last 2 days....
welcome to the other side!!! or @ least the beginning of it. i to am a hydro abuser & have been for the past 8 yr's @ least. On April 15 i quit my addiction of about 80-90mg a day maybe more on some day's who know's, i quit on April 14 or 15 i can't remember but anyway's had a kidney stone pop up ( which i've had in the past but never like this, i was reallY scared & sober for once so i honestly wasn't seeking) Sorry i left out the part that i woke up pissing blood & blood clots. any how i got clean before this & after about 2-3 weeks i could actually enjoy life like i never have been able to the past 8 yr's, It was great & wonderful but then my stone came after 64 day's or so & i gave in & relapsed. i felt i had to after all i was in so much pain & i've never claimed to be god so i caved. The past 6 weeks, minus the past 5 day's i used & abused my script's like the addict that i'am would. but i will add i know iam much happier without the pill's! Before i started back my DOC was my family, kid's & the gym & while using the past 6 weeks that as all changed. YES i did have legit reason but still abused them cause that's me & I know i must be a dire addict, period!! Yes u will have a rough month but i can promise u it's so worth it in the end!! I feel like the devil has lost his battle with me & that is something that is just awesome!! Sorry for all my rambling but lot's of love & prayer's to u!!! Stacy
hi Daniel congrats on deciding to quit.. it is gonna be rough because of the amount i was doing them at least 25 a day for 5 yrs got clean for 3 yrs a few months ago i had a procedure and went on them i only needed to be on them a few weeks but my body got hooked again and i was soo freaked out about the detox i kept taking them another 2 months:( i am i think 8 days clean!!! YAY... i feel GREAT... those first few days up to maybe 5 r the worse i would look at the thomas recipe at bottm right page and get some of the ingrediants they will DEF help.. just keep pushing and keep posting everyone will support u and help keep pushing you forward this is a GREAT site.. it is soooo wonderful to be clean.. i already am getting my REAL emotions back everything is coming back.. it is hard but sooo worth it,.. one thing is you need to cut ALL your sources you said u had many and when u r hurting your mind and body is going to be SCREAMING for pills it is so easy to cave for ANY of us if we have pills accessable to us many have went to the lengths of red flagging them selves w every dr and pharmacy that is how much we don't trust ourselves lol... you sound like a brilliant person w lots to look forward too that is what kept pushing me i was tired (already in 3 short motnhs) of being chained to the pill bottle and my whole life revolving around them stupid things... you really are making the right choice just be strong it is not comfortable but doable we have all done it on here... just keep posting all u have too.. more people will be on to give support... prayers are with you stay the coarse and stay focused u WILL NOT regret it it is only a few days where u feel really crappy...