I started suboxone 1 week ago, and just a few days ago found out I am pregnant.
I started subs because I had been an opiate addict for many years (pills) and have never gotten out of that frame of mind. It started out as back problems leading to a major surgery. When it became obvious that the pills were being abused, I was cut off. Unless I was pregnant, then My OB insists My pain be treated. My pain becomes so bad during pregnancy that it makes my blood pressure sky rocket and leads to other complications such as per eclampsia and growth restriction.
Well, not having any opiates over the last couple years since my youngest was born, I would do anything possible to get high and take away my pain. Marijuana, alcohol, when I could get my hands on pills I would, and eventually I started using meth. I got in legal trouble, and am on drug court now. Since being drug tested multiple times a week through probation and treatment, I have stayed clear of illegal substances and abused others. I would find ways to get high on over the counter meds, and my prescription meds- especially my nerve pain medication- lyrica. I have been so over this lifestyle. Its just a vicious cycle that takes me around and around and spiraling downward. My pain is unbearable though and I absolutely needed help and no one wants to help an addict with their pain.
I did a lot of research on different options for me. I had recently been through long term inpatient treatment, and this cycle started again shortly after getting out. I ended up coming clean to my drug court team and asking for help. There is a suboxone doctor at my hospital where I attend teeatment, and I got to see him soon after.
He put me on 14-16 mg of suboxone and I am feeling like a whole new person! I haven't felt so happy and healthy sjnce before I left home for college! 12 years ago! I am so extremely happy with my success already, after just a week on it. I can function, I'm motivated, I am not craving at all, and I'm thinking long term.
A couple of days ago I found out I am pregnant. I am terrified. My friend told me that she is pregnant and she is still on it, so I started looking into it. I am pretty happy with what I have found. I know there is a risk of NAS. Which there also is for oxycodone. And the lyrica is a lot worse for baby too. Since I have abused them both, I highly doubt drug court, or the doctors will want me on either of those.
I am very scared of two things. I'm scared of being on suboxone while pregnant because of the stigma and because of the withdrawals. But I am also scared that my sub doc will say..."well, you've only been on them for a week, let's just take you off." If I get taken off and say I am able to be on the other pain meds, I am afraid of abusing them and hurting the baby. If I get taken off and am not allowed to be on anything, I am afraid my blood pressure will sky rocket the whole pregnancy again, and baby will grow super slow and stop growing all together, just like what happened the other 2 times. They were terrifying pregnancies. Still birth was spoken of a lot.
So I guess my main question is, do you think my sub doctor may try to take me off of them since I've been on them so short term and was not in active opiate abuse? After just one week of taking 16mg a day, will I withdrawal? I see him this afternoon, and my OB in just a little bit. I just want to arm myself with as much information as possible going in there.
Without the subs, even just looking at where I was a couple of weeks ago, I would not feel it's time for a baby at all. I am married to an amazing man and have 2 beautiful daughters. We have awesome families. But my state of mind and my health has not been where it should be for a very very long time and I feel like this is saving my life.
Thank you for reading! Please give your input, I would greatly appreciate it!