It disappeared.

[kikarose]

My Suboxone  1/2 strip I had left in my purse just disappeared. I went to take a nap and left my purse in the living room. So either one of my fiancé kids took it or it fell out of purse which I don't know how that could have happened. I guess I'll never know where it went.

[helplessangel]

I agree with njgirl! Subs kept me off of opiates for a long long time. Had I not taken subs, I might not have stopped. In my mind, the naloxone made any purchase of opiates moot. I'm sorry to hear about your stepson. In my humble opinion, if one is not used to opiates , taking 2mg is enough to make anyone sick. Hopefully, that will keep him away from your meds in the future!

[NJgirl79]

Hi sorry for the delay.. I dont get any kind of notification when im tagged in a post. Strange..
anyhow. Yes. I have normal energy. I find that if my dose is taken separately through the day. It last longer and the energy stays until bed time. My doctor had ne on 3 Suboxone a day. I take 1 and a half in the morning and same for the afternoon. Give it a try if your lacking energy at any point in the day. The first few weeks I took Suboxone I felt jittery but it definitely wears off and you will no longer feel that jittery feeling. Dont let ANYONE tell you that your substituting one drug for another because that is so far from the truth. Your not stealing and your not putting a drug into your body thats going to kill you. And your functioning as normal women doing normal everyday activities. Your doing great!! Suboxone has kept me clean solid. Im not using Herion and uts been almost 12 yrs. I get NO urges either. Keep up the great work and if you have anymore questions pls ask away. :)

[kikarose]

No anxiety for me. I did free anxiety when I went CT. Last time. I feel shaky still and sleeping is still difficult without the seroquel. Like I've said before Suboxone is a person choice. I'll say it myself I am not completely sober cause Im using the Suboxone. But it was my choice. I've read many articles praising Suboxone and detested ones. I'll let everyone know when I come off them what it is like. I see my therapist tomorrow.
So off topic going back to my missing Suboxone, that my fiancé swears his kids didn't steal it. Well his 14yR go TN arrested last night for prowling looking in people's cars and stealing stuff from It. So, now was my suspicion of someone stealing is not that far off.  And now he's in the bathroom puking for the last hour. When he was perfectly fine all night. Now my feelings are thinking he stole it and took It. It was only 2mg. I hope he didn't but everything is pointing towards yes.
I'm doing the best I can. Every minute every hour and everyday.  
I pray for the strength everyday to remain on a drug free path.

[helplessangel]

In my experience, subs do make you high. Once you're over the w/d, they give you tons of energy. Just like opiates. One time my dog got part of a sub and was poisoned. Thank God she's ok with a vets help. Try to use the subs as less of a time as you can. They are extremely addictive and are hard to come off. All my best!

[BigDaddy_59]

Stick with the meetings!

Sobriety is selfish because it has to be. You need to think about getting yourself better before all else.

I have come to see other people's actions as totally human and something I need to accept with serenity or I have to let them go. More often than not (95% of the time), I learn to accept them as the flawed human that they, just like me, are.

By getting a sponsor, going to meetings, and working a program, I have been given a life beyond my wildest dreams. And if I can do it, anyone can :o)

And good (great) advice from da BearsFan too!

[BearsFan1966]

that is such an awesome way to think! You must think and love yourself before you can love others! You are doing great and moving forward and not letting him bring you down. Just take one second, one minute, one day at a time and the rest will fall into place! New day New you! xoox

[Krissy_123]

Thank you for answering. Like I said I was curious and that did explain some. So you're not actually getting high? They just keep your w/d's at bay so you can feel normal? Is that correct? Do you get the anxiety though,that we all got when we quit cold turkey?

[kikarose]

Do the Suboxone make you feel high NJ GIRL79? Do you just feel normal again like me? I don't have any urge to use , do you feel that way too?

[kikarose]

One more thing my doc was not prescribed I was spending 20$ a pill at 60$ to 80$ a day. It was nothing by waiting buying lying and I didn't want 5o get were I was last time lying stealing cheating and just doing bad things that I wouldn't normally do.  Cause the urge to have the pills would make me do things illegal  and where would I end up I. Jail or dead. Atleast with the  Suboxone I don't have to do anything bad or illegal. That's why Im glad I'm off the oxy and on Suboxone

[kikarose]

One more thing my doc was not prescribed I was spending 20$ a pill at 60$ to 80$ a day. It was nothing by waiting buying lying and I didn't want 5o get were I was last time lying stealing cheating and just doing bad things that I wouldn't normally do.  Cause the urge to have the pills would make me do things illegal  and where would I end up I. Jail or dead. Atleast with the  Suboxone I don't have to do anything bad or illegal. That's why Im glad I'm off the oxy and on Suboxone

[kikarose]

Also I feel alittle sleepy at times. And feel more hungry. Off topic I didn't take the seroquel last time and my sleep was broken all night no solid sleep for more then 2hrs. I don't want to become addicted to them as those are addicting as I've read. I'm already taking the Suboxone and that's enough drugs for right now.

[kikarose]

I would would say they make in feel normal. Not high feeling. Normal energy. Not hyper or anything. I guess they just take away the withdrawals you feel. I chose to take them cuz I didn't want to do all the lying that came with the high on oxy. I don't feel high like the oxy did to me. Not at all. So, I think ppl take the Suboxone because even having to go though 12 to 48 of withdrawals is too much for some people to deal with. In my case thats what it was I didn't have the strength to go on for days feeling like death. So I picked the Suboxone  route and many can agree or disagree  with my personal choice. It will depend on the person if that want long term treatment of Suboxone or short term. Ive decided for me that it will be short term. I don't want to have to take them forever. To feel normal,  maybe how some people think anti-depressants make them feel normal. I hoping that when I stop taking the Suboxone  it won't be as bad coming off them. But for me it's having the ability to at least feel normal having more strength in this mind set than the oxy high mind set. To deal with my addiction  and to be able to have my plan and keep it. Because when I was high I couldn't deal with it and withdrawing I couldnt deal. So Suboxone is helping me to give me the strength to deal with my addiction.  By realizING that I need a support group a 12 step program and a therapist  to get me to where I want to be. Non dependant on any opiates.

[tramadollover1234]

I wouldn't consider yourself sober if you are on the subs. But that's just my opinion. I know they have saved many people and that's the most important thing. If you can be on them and successful that's great!

[Krissy_123]

What do the subs do to you? I mean what do you feel like? Does it just skip over the w/d part and you feel all better and normal again? I'm just curious as to what they do? Does your mind feel like you're still just taking your oxycodone? I guess if that's the case it wouldn't technically skip the w/d part would it? Cuz your still high? I'm sorry for the questions,I really am curious. I'm just trying to understand why people take the subs? Why not just stay on your doc?

[kikarose]

He would never go with me it's not his thing. He's a"I've been doing it this way , MY WAY MY WHOLE LIFE" period! We have fought more in the last 2 days than is the last month. I don't know what the future holds , but I do know THAT NOTHING CHANGES IF NOTHING CHANGES. IM CHANGING EVERYDAY AND LEARNING EVERYDAY AND THAT TO ME IF THE MEANING OF LIFE.

[kikarose]

Thanks for the support meeting are going well. I have read all the info they gave me and think it is a good tool for me. I have noticed on day 3 that the Suboxone makes me feel maybe jittery and maybe shaking feeling in my body. Especially if I don't eat it is worse. One more thing I noticed with the Suboxone is my stomach aches and feels extremely bloated. Does it cause constipation? But today was another day oxy free, no calling and driving and waiting over n over again. To feel high for a couple hours. I got dressed . I found that everyday I won't stay in my pj's or sweatpants I'll actually get dressed. My step son told me , "wow you look nice today" that was nice to hear. My fiancé just wanted to know why I was all dressed up. Nothing uplifting.  Doing normal daily things again is good for me. I cooked dinner. I went and walked outside and enjoyed the 60 degree weather we are having here in wisconsin. I went to a friends and talked to her and saw he new baby. Doing normal things again is a big deal. Cause before all I wanted was to be alone and enjoy my high alone. I really like being and feeling a sort of normalcy. The winds open so I can feel the slight breeze and smell the fresh air. I like it. Feeling great on day 3. Thanks for the support everyone. I'll keep coming back.

[BearsFan1966]

Maybe you could get your boyfriend to go to a meeting with you? Sounds like he is a stumbling block for you right now. You need to concentrate on getting yourself clean and not having to deal with his insecurities...maybe it is his weed smoking that is causing this for him? Please be careful to not let him control you and your sobriety! We are all in your corner!

[IBKleen]

Rose, are you planning on getting clean anytime soon? If so this is a great place for support and guidance. We can help you through every step of the way. Let us know.

[NJgirl79]

I too take Suboxone. I struggle with family memebers that have addiction issues as well. I bought a lockbox from Walmart for $10. Its a fire saftey box that's metal and includes two keys. Walgreens also has one that can be bolted into a dresser drawer and also has a keyed entry. I get 90 Suboxone strips a month with is 3 boxes.. I immediately lock them in my lockbox the second I get home for fear that one of my children may accidentally ingest it. Or that they may be stolen. I have 4 kids.. 18, 14, 13, & 5. Everyone of them were shown what my medication looks like and to never ever touch it. They know that it is a serious medication but only my 18 yr old knows exactly what its prescribed for. You should definitely consider buying a lockbox with having such a dangerous controlled substance in your home. If one of the kids or anyone for that matter ingested it, it can be fatal. Make sure you vacuum well. Your car too. Keep us posted. Good Luck!

[kikarose]

I've decided that I will hide it in my room for now on and not in my purse at all.

[kikarose]

Nobody knows I have it. And it was the other half dose. The 14 doesnt. But the 18 doesn't live with us and has her problems with cutting and I know she drinks sometimes and smokes weed sometimes but that's all I know about her. I hoping it fell out of my purse sometime. When I left the house and went to first meeting tonite  and it went well and I'll be going to another one tomorrow.  I had a long talk with my fiancé about. His feelings and how he feels about the meetings , he thinks that if I go to meetings I'll meet new "friends and that'll get me on other drugs or that I'll meet another man and cheat on him. He thinks that I was cheating on him these last 5 months of using. I told him I wasnt. I was just getting the pills and coming back home. I told him I need meetings this time. He said you didn't need them the last time you got clean. And I said that's probably why I relapsed cause I never dealt with anything that's inside me. He doesn't want me to make any addict friends or men for that matter. But he needs to know that me being clean is the most important  and that I need his support with what ways I'm trying to stay clean. He's a very jealous And insecure man. He thinks I'll cheat most of all. I told him I'm sorry and that the guilt was eating me alive and that's why I wrote a note and left it somewhere he'd find it. I told him that he needs to stop smoking weed cause I don't want to start using that cause it's in my face and of course he says I plan on quitting when I look for a job. But he's done this 3x already. And only lasted 2 days each time before he made to buy more. I know I need to worry about my addiction but his could jeopardize mine.

[Krissy_123]

And do his kids take drugs? Would they even know what suboxone was if they seen it?

[Krissy_123]

So now are you out? Or was is it your other half a dose for the night?

[tramadollover1234]

Do they know you have it?