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Just beginning need support

I am just a few hours into getting my life back. I'm scared and trying to remember how I lived without Lortab. I don't remember when it took control of me but I want it back. I was taking 2 tabs about 4 times a day. I came clean to my family, dr, etc. So withdraw is imminent because I chose to cut off all access. I know I'm in for some long nights and rough days so if I could just talk to someone who understands it would help. I lost my mother, brother, and 6 yr relationship in 3 months and since then I've used the pills to just numb out and I'm sick of it. Thanks for any support you could give
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Avatar universal
Hi and welcome there are great people on this site that can help more than I can because I've been doing everything wrong so here I am two days n almost 3 come 1am so I'm hoping that I will get through it...I wanted to post just to let ya knw that someone is out there and is reading ur story so when ur up tonite to fighting withdrawls just remember that on the other side of the country I am too...take care and if you need to talk mesg me also I'm really sorry to hear about ur family death. Has always been hard on me hope all is well tonite nikole  
Helpful - 0
401095 tn?1351391770
Welcome
Your dose is not high in comparison with many here

Bout what I took when i was low on pills but preferred more

Narcs can serve as an AD...it is a dangerous AD tho due to addiction..it can become our source of escape...a source of happiness...but they eventually turn on u...and bring depression only..and guilt often as well

but we continue to take em..they build a spider web around our brain

My physical wds were nuttin to speak of after 5 yrs using...mental wds hit me hard a few weeks later and is why most relapse
Aftercare is our only therapy...and most addicts resist it like the plague

A fe hours will be a few days, then a few months then a few yrs....but u always have to watch ur back...cos those pills do not give a poot about u...they only invade and take over your life

Good 4 u...the health pages r full of great info to help u right now..the thomas recipe helps alot

good luck and hang tight
Helpful - 0
1047946 tn?1332608029
Welcome to the forum!! So sorry to hear about all that you have been going through lately. I lost my older sister a few years back at the age of 31. I know how hard it can be to lose a sibling.
The good news is your habit isn't that big as of yet. But, addiction is addiction no matter what the amount. It is not so much the amount of pills but the mental properties that goes along with it. It's a lifelong battle whether were taking 2 a day or 20 a day. Be proud of yourself that you caught it when you did. Most do not. When I first started taking vicodin for back and sciatic pain I never took more than prescribed and was on them for a year. I finally had surgery and the pain subsided. I stopped taking them and didn't realize I was having withdrawals until I joined a forum. People told me I was fortunate I stopped when I did since I was only taking 8, 5mg vicodin a day. They said if I continued to take them I would more than likely double, triple, or even quadruple the amount I was taking. I kinda laughed on the inside because I didn't think it was humanly possible to take that many. I mean, where would I get them? Wouldn't taking more than prescribed kill me? I thought everyone was joking around about the amount they were taking a day. Anyways, it would never happen to me.
Fast forward a year. My back and sciatic pain came back due to scar tissue. I started back on the pills and my tolerance grew. And what do you know. I found out the hard way that the ones trying to help me were not lying about the amount one could take. I went from physically dependent to mentally addicted. I tried quitting off and on for a few years. I even had 6 months of clean time but always seemed to go back. I finally decided enough was enough and have put them down for good. I will not put myself or my family through it again.
There are some things that will help you get through the physical withdrawals. Check in to the amino acid protocol. It really does help. It also helped me with the mental aspect of swallowing pills each day. I somewhat had a mental addiction to vitamins! I stopped taking all but fish oil and a multivitamin without a problem though. Be sure to start exercising. If the withdrawals are tough it can be hard to muster up the energy to do so but force yourself. It makes a world of difference. Take hot baths as needed for the chills. Be sure to stay busy. Don't lay around feeling sorry for yourself. I've done it both ways and the time I exercise was much easier. The easiest time for me was when I was working 7 days a week, 12 hour shifts. I didn't have a chance to lay around. So if possible, try to continue with your everyday routine. Anyone can if they keep a strong mindset and push through. It is by no means easy, but possible.
You really should look into NA or possibly an addiction therapist. You need to get to the core issues of why you are using. For many it starts off as pain but there are usually other reasons why we continue taking them. Sometimes we know why we were using but cannot usually fix it or we just bury it away.
I'm just happy you caught this when you did. Get a plan together, tell yourself every second of everyday that failure is not an option, and fight like crazy. Come on here and post often. Also, answer other people's post as it helps with the motivation factor while detoxing. We will be behind you every step of the way. Keep a strong mindset, stay motivated, and know anything is possible if you put your mind to it. For some reason I've been dealing with a bit of insomnia lately so usually get on the computer and mess around til I can go back to sleep. You may be dealing with some sleepless nights so if you need any company, just post! Hang in there. You will beat this!
Best of luck!

Brian
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