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1171817 tn?1281632180

Life's Terms

Guy's I need to vent because I dont want to use pills!

Life has been pretty rough the last 16 months. I have 81 days off the dope. Praise God !! and for that I am truly grateful to you all at medhelp & my Lord Jesus Christ. Today I am mad, frustrated, and just flat out disgusted with what is going on! I want everything to go my way and it's just not happening.

Waaaaaaahhhhh!!!!

This is where it gets tricky. When I am restless, irritable or discontent my brain says get some pills to change " Life's Terms" . Yea what a crock that is, The truth is that I am right where God wants me to be, in the fight and looking to Him for dependence. I must face it, Life's Terms can not be manipulated. While using it seemed as if I was in control, able to change anything, living in a fantasy without worry and neatly avoiding Lifes Terms.

Today, without dope I am dealing head on with the reality of Life's Terms.  Now that I have wrote this note I feel better.  I now accept of my place in life. I am blessed to have 81 days without dope. I am blessed to have a job, my health, family, friends, MH, salvation and the problems associated with being a clean off dope ! My problems are so miniscule compared to getting sober again. I am glad that I am not in control of Life's Terms, and I even more grateful that God is the One who is in control.

Peace to all my fellow sufferers out there.

Dafishman
7 Responses
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1202033 tn?1273771354
You are on the right track with leaving your addiction with God. Right on!! He is the only one who truly holds the power to heal this disease. Stay strong and stay hand in hand with your Lord Jesus Christ. You are doing so great and your attitude towards this is right where it needs to be to stay sober. Great post!!!

Luv, Jacky
Helpful - 0
1171817 tn?1281632180
Thanks Jacky,,,, Way to go on your 55 days!!  You are doing really good too. I remember when you came to MH. It's good that you are so active here.

I was going pretty crazy today. I am not proud of some of the words I said today though. They were not very Christian like I can assure you!!  Oh well. I need to put my expectations back in line with Life's Terms and be satisfied instead of always in want, want, WANT!!!  I also have got to quit listening to my "feelings" because my "feelings" are NOT facts. They can get me in soooooo much trouble if I don't put them in check.

I had no one to talk with earlier so I just came here and used the site to get it out. Afterwards I felt better so said a prayer and things got a good bit better.

This site is a God send !! He is working thu so many on here it's amazing!!


Dafish
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Hey dude good to here from you....you haven't posted in a wile was wondering how you been doing....well it sounds like your having one of those days....we all get them and they su## ....but hold on to your faith...all things are possible thew Christ Jesus...
when we are week he is strong....you might want to give some sort of aftercare a shot
im involved a lot with my church activates but also go to a substance abuse consllor
once a week...and when I crave im off to an N/A meeting...dont get me wrong I pray all the time for strength for this illness but also know it takes some work on our part sometimes to get the proper help to treat addiction...my faith in God has kept me
clean for 163 days now but some of that is also my willingness to surrender and go to aftercare for help...keep up the good work in staying clean and may God bless you abundantly.......Gnarly  
Helpful - 0
1171817 tn?1281632180
Thanks my brother. You always have good advise. I am better today. I have been out of church now for over a year. I go to Bible Study Fellowship every Monday night for a couple of hours. We are in a 9 month course devoted to the Book of John. It has been an amazing journey. We just happen to be on John 17 where Christ prays for the Disciples and for us as the future believer right before the was crucified. Funny how it worked out in the study because its Easter Sunday this weekend! We get very deep in the word each week with assignment for everyday. I know it's not the same as Church though. I have got to get back into the church starting this weekend to worship with other believers.

Have a great Easter  - HE has Risen!!!!!!!!  Amen !!!!!!!

Dafish
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Dafishman I've said it to you before, you are one of Gods Angels on earth. The devil may be testing you but he is no match for what you have behind you, the Love and power of our dear Lord. Your kind words and inspiration have been invaluable to so many people here looking for support. I hope in your time of need that others can help you the way you have helped so many here. I'm praying for you and sending you big hugs and a big kiss too, lol made you smile didn't I?  
Helpful - 0
1171817 tn?1281632180
Moonshyne,
You made me smile sooooo BIG today. I am so thankful for your nice words. MH has saved my butt and to hear from you that I have been a small part just warmed my heart to the perfect temperature. Ditto right back at you sister. Lot's of love flows around this joint if we get over our cheap-selves!!!

Pride is a ***** and addiction loves pride!!

Dafish
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
You know, even with your struggles today you are an inspiration. I'm slowly learning it's a life hurdle (or mountain!?) and 81 days seems unachievable to me. Thank you for being so strong and giving someone like me a goal to reach.
Well done for recognizing your urge and turning to a healthy release of emotions. If only I can be so strong...
8o)
Helpful - 0
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