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Avatar universal

Love that percoset,except when I'm all out

Hello, everyone! I hope I get responses to this because ther is no one else I can talk to about this. I really love pills and especially percoset. I started out on vicodin which was my grqandmothers presription, but she gave them to me. Then I thre my back out so I got a presription for percoset, and now I'm having a love/hate affair with them. I get 90 pills every 30 days, but now that's isn't enough. I just got them filled on the 15th and now I only have about 20 left and its only the 19th! What do I do? I can't talk to my doctor cuz then he'll know I've got a problem and he won't give them anymore. How do I taper with 20 pills so I don't go through withdrawals? I've done it before and I felt like death! What can I take to help? Will Ativan help or drinking some wine? How long will I feel like **** if I taper slowly? I don't even know if I have enough self-control to taper! Please give me some feedback, I really need help! I don't want to stop permanently cuz they make me so happy and fun to be around. I'm not stressed and I feel so good! What do I do?
11 Responses
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Avatar universal
Going cold turkey more than likely will not put you in the hospital...ask around here, I bet
90 percent will tell you cold turkey is the way to go. It is a week of something similiar to the flu-a little bit worse. I went cold turkey 27 days ago-all while taking care of two children, one who is a toddler. They kept me busy and my mind off what I was going through. I can't believe your doctor told you that. Cold turkey is totally doable. In my opinion, sub is not the way to go, who knows how long you will end up being on that? And guess what? You will have to then withdrawal from the sub. I hear that is even worse. The fear of the withdrawals is way worse than the withdrawals themselves. I feel you have some more thinking to do.
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Keep the comments coming! You all have been an inspiration to me! I am an addict, and I went and talked to my doctor. He is having me start outpatient detox next week, I'll be on suboxone to help me get through it. Does anyone know about suboxone? I'd appreiciate any info you have.  I've still been taking the pills cuz my dr. said it will be better not to go cold turkey, that I'll get really sick and could end up in the hospital. So I'm still high every day and I'm lovin it while it lasts, but it still doesn't feel the same for some reason. I also tol my mom and my husband, both of them were surprisingly supportive and said they would be with me through the whole thing. I've had a horrible couple of days though, just the guilt I feel and the anger I've had to deal with from my family. They are really worried about me, and it makes me feel terrible...
Helpful - 0
1412212 tn?1285599428
We are going or have been down this viscous cycle that you are going through now. We never want to admit we are addicts but when you start counting pills and trying to figure out how to get more before your next refill then there is a problem. I got in a lot of trouble with my addiction. I had 5 different Dr.'s prescribing to me and I got caught. That was a hard thing to face but it woke me up and I am thankful that it happened! I went through major detox but I knew I was fighting for my life! I am 38 days clean and I have more energy than I did on the pills. I used to tell myself- how can anyone live without these things- I was superwoman! I couldn't think straight without a pill. It was the first thing I took when I woke up until I went to bed. That little monster would say "Take one it makes you feel good and you can conquer your day" then he would say "oh take 2 at time etc... "until I was spiraling down a much more dangerous path and started mixing. I almost lost my family over these stupid pills!
You have come to the right site if you are willing to go through with this. Try the Thomas Recipe-it will help some with you through the WD.'s
Be honest with yourself and knowing that these pills are getting out of control.
I know what you are going through with the pain. I was hit by an 18 wheeler but I am a survivor through all of this. We ALL are SURVIVORS who make it through!
You can do this! It's time for a change and time to get your life back in control.
If you decide taper talk to your Dr. you will be surprised on how supportive they are!
Good luck and let us know what you decide!
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
you can do it.  I know exactly what you mean about the kids.  I only have 1 child, but i never wanted to do anything with him until I took a pill, then once i did  Iwould be so happy and wanting ot take him to the park and do all this stuff... it did take a few weeks but i am off pills 29 days now have the energy to do things eith him and play and not be super tired (until the end of the day at least).... I enjoy my son so much more now - b/c i am not thinking about when i can take my next pill while playing catch with him - I am thinking about him.  Quitting will make you more fun to be around.  This is all scary, but you can do it if you really want to.  
I think you should tell your DR. - he might give you something to help you sleep at night or something while going through withdrawls.  
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
i will not lie it WILL BE the hardest thing in the world to do BUTTTT. it will be the best your fam dosent know who you are. The frist 4 days are the worst but after that each day will get better. you will not sleep and the chills omg. but everyone is different. i am 2.5 days clean for the second time. the frist i was clean for 120 days and felt the best in years then one day and one pill well atleat i am clean for 2.5 days. if i can do it with a wife and three kids that dont know you can do it. all you have to do is bleave in yourself. it will get better. god bless
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Thank you so much for what all of you said! I'm just really afraid to stop, I love them and I've been racking my brain trying to figure out how to get more, last month I lied to my doctor and said I left my pills in a hotel, so he gave me a whole new refill, and then those were gone so I tried buying them online from some foreign pharmacy, and they ripped me off.  I hear what all of you said, and I honestly don't think of myself as an addict but after what all of you said, I guess I am. That's scary, I just want to feel good and haappy. I have two beautiful kids and a great husband, and he of course doesn't know anything, he would probably divorce me and I definitely don't want to lose my family! They mean more to me than the pills, but how do I do it? I'm scared, and I still feel like I'm not ready to give them up? How do I go through withdrawals when I have my kids? My husband stays out of town all week so I really don't think he knows. I haven't taken any today but they are calling to me. Plus, I'm tired all the time! My poor kids! I never want to do anything except sleep, then I take the pills and I feel so much better! Please keep giving me your feedback, I really need to hear it, and I can feel some withdrawal symptoms coming on. How many can I take right now if I'm tapering off?
Helpful - 0
1436228 tn?1328053960
wow you sound like I did 23 days ago I too was out and just thought hell i will get more on Monday and whenWD set in it was a shock a reality check.  I hope you to will listen to this reality check and all those that have answered you.  I am a newbie and like I said after over 20 years just realized what I am and I functioned realy well in society and family only now realizing the down  falls of my favorite friend percocetts.  think about when you are coming down and before you take more, I found now that I was so stressed out at theat moment that really all the good feelings were gone.  so I took more now I do know that the pills hid the real world and the bad crazy feelings outweighted the good.
good luck and read a few of my journals it is a hard road and I am not there yet but getting there. there is so much support here
hey I am going out now to do things at one time I only thought I could do high
wendy
Helpful - 0
1047946 tn?1332608029
You say you don't want to stop permanently because they make you so happy and fun to be around. The thing is you might think you are fun to be around but more than likely the people around you already know that something is different about you. Your fiends are probably missing the old you. The feeling you are getting is a false sense of well being. Your brain puts a halt to making seratonin, which is the feel could chemical, because the pills are taking over. They cause a chemical imbalance in the brain.
You are an addict which means you have to stop taking them permanently. Eventually that "good" feeling you are getting will stop. You will reach a point where no matter how many you take the energy buzz will no longer be reachable. You will just keep taking them to keep from getting sick. But even after you are at that point you may not be sick from withdrawals but you will feel tired, unmotivated, and just all around like crap. If you took 70 pills in just a few days I can promise you that you are not far from the point of all of this happening. An addict just can't take a few here and a few there. Once an addict, always an addict. Stop now before everything takes a turn for the worse. You could end up losing your family, your friends, your job, etc. It's a road most addicts end up going down unless they catch it in time and do everything in their power to get and stay clean. You need to inform your doctor that you are an addict and to not prescribe narcotics any longer. If you don't take this step relapse is inevitable. If the pills are in reach, an addict will take them. You have to cut off all supplies. Trust me when I say once you cross that line into addiction there is no taking them for recreation. You may plan on only taking a couple for the day but that couple will land you right back where you are now taking 15 or more a day and that number will keep going up. If you do continue to use you will end up going through withdrawals every month waiting for that refill. The withdrawals will last longer and longer because each month you will take more and more each day. You may plan to cut your use back "next month" but being an addict that won't happen. If you could control your use you wouldn't run out over 3 weeks early each month. You are further into addiction than what you think. Have you considered stopping and getting help? Do you really want to go through withdrawals for 3 weeks each month? Is it worth going through those withdrawals every month to only use for 5 days? You will get sick of the cycle and I hope you get sick of it soon. It will only get harder and harder as time passes,
Helpful - 0
495284 tn?1333894042
COMMUNITY LEADER
Welcome to the forum.  You are playing with fire here.  These pills are soon going to turn on you.  They give us a false sense of security and rob you of everything you hold sacred.  I hope you spend some time looking around the forum and reading others posts.  This addiction progresses at a rapid rate.  I hope you make the right decision to put them down and do what you need to stay off them.  This addiction is deadly and we have said goodbye to a couple people the last couple months.....We will be here to support you if you want off them ......sara
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
its late ill check back with you in the morning have a great night
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
HI and welcome to the forum....well I wish I new what to tell you.....your going to have vto go threw withdrawals weather you want to or not...now you could sorta taper with what you have but you really dont have enough to do it right...going C/T off that amount wont kill you you will feel like he!! for a few days but you'll get over it.....what really consirns me is the fact you dont relize your an addict....you might be early on with it but its already got you your in some dangerous water here...if you keep messing with this stuff you will get to a point where your just taking the pills to keep the sick off they will stop getting you high b/4 long you also build up a tolerance to them as you all ready are your script is running out early you have a lot of danger signs here...this is nothing to be playing with take it from someone that road the narcotic train for 16 1/2 yrs it leads nowhere but to institutions jails or death...you really need to take a serious look at what your doing and stop wile you still can this desiese only gets worst with time trust me they dont make enough pills to satisfy a hungry addict I can help you if you want off this merry go round
keep posting and spend some time reading the post good luck and God bless...Gnarly  
Helpful - 0
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495284 tn?1333894042
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