Made it to Day 5 and I'm sooooo alive!

[Jig29]

Hi guys! I'm new at this and honestly just figured it out! Lol! I just wanted peeps who are stalking these sights like I did to know that today is day 5 and I'm finally, finally feeling better!! Day 4 was rough emotionally, I had really bad anxiety and still was having a hard time finding the light!! But the good news is I got about 3 hours of sleep last night and I feel really pretty good today! So anyone who is on day 1-4 please know it will get better! One thing that got me through these past few days is knowing that I never EVER have to feel that way again!! Hold on! Trust me!!! You will make it through this! Just put in the time! Think about all of the time we wasted waiting around for our next script, or waiting for that text from our dealer, or wasting all of that time worrying where or when we can get our next pill! So that is what I keep telling myself, I'm investing in me! I'm going to take the time to go through hell so I won't have to waste any more time.. Just think about that!

And for those of you who have been posting, I just want to say thank you! You have been my saving grace!! I can't even tell you how thankful I am for these sights!

Stay strong!

[dominosarah]

Nice to see you!

[Back2Me]

I have been in your spot and have relapsed 157 thousand times. Each one gets worse, and comes quicker. Worse one I didn't sleep for six days straight. Didn't even know what was physically possible. Let this be your last, you got off easy this time. I don't have the answers only you can figure that out. Listening to people on here would be a good start though.

[dominosarah]

I have always looked up to you as you have always spoke the truth about addiction.  Thank you for always doing that as it has helped me thru my trials also.

Congrats on your 11 yrs clean~

[clean_in_ks]

As always, a fabulous post!  Congrats a few days early on your 11 YEARS!

[dominosarah]

Congrats on 5 days!! Get going with some aftercare as we need to face our demons we have buried as they do come to the surface.

[CATUF]

A wise person once told me, as I sat with 30 Clean Days under my belt and fresh from a 28 day rehab: "if you don't have a program of recovery, you WILL relapse."  I thought "you dumb b_____, I will NEVER do that again" ... and I was POSITIVE that I never would.  

But I did and before the week was out.  It's like it says in the Big Book: "We are unable, at certain times, to bring into our consciousness with sufficient force the memory of the suffering and humiliation of even a week or a month ago.  We are without defense against the first drink [or pill, or hit, or whatever]."

After a 6 month relapse that literally almost killed me (and did grave damage to my finances and work), I landed in a different rehab and stayed there 122 days. When I got out there were no more "half measures," no more thinking "I got this" or "I'll never do that," and no more secrets or reservations. What I found instead was Honestly, Open-Mindedness, and Willingness - which is H.O.W. we get (and stay) clean and sober.

That last rehab started on June 7, 2005, and I've been actively working a program of recovery, one day at a time, ever since. On Tuesday I'll have 11 years.  I couldn't get 60 days on my own, but with a program I've got 4,015 days as of today.

The program of recovery makes all the difference. Just not-using doesn't work.  Get with the program, and then fasten your seatbelt! You won't believe how good life can be in sustained recovery.

CATUF
4015

[jifmoc]

Love this comment, CATUF. Congrats on 11 years!

[jifmoc]

Glad you have relief and congrats on 5 days. The relief you feel now, unfortunately, doesn't last a lifetime and our addict brains need work to keep us away from drugs. What will you do for aftercare? Do you have that in place?

[jerry4664]

right on !! day 5 is huge and come Monday the world will be a better place just stay focused and don't slip stay away from any triggers best wishes!!

[VICourageous]

I am SO glad you put up a Post finally.
Just stay strong, get out and get some Support, always keep your Guard Up and stick around for Support on this site.
Thanks for the info you gave us in my post. This will help us understand your detox a bit more. Just know that as the Brain Chems adjust back, you might go through some Mental. This is the part after the physical. Learning to live in are own skin substances free takes many, many, many changes and new roads. Wishing you the best.
Bless
Vickie

[Frogger76]

Congrats to you!! Five days is awesome!!! I haven't been on here in a while, but it's nice to come back and see people making it!!! I know it's been rough, but you're doing it, and your story will help those struggling! Keep up the fight, and give yourself a well deserved pat on the back!