He has to make the decision to stop. I know that's not what you want to hear, but you can't force a addict to get better. Is there a local support group you can attend? You must take care of yourself first before you can help him. If an when he decides to end his addiction, a suboxone therapy regimen may be what it takes to help him. Google suboxone, look at that site, and see if it can help you.
I agree with Ga Guy. Its also hard when hes up, then down then up again, on the rollercoaster of w/d. If he agrees to the suboxone, it will stabalize him. That will help I bet with the anger issues and stuff.
I know you probably won't want to hear this, but until HE is ready to quit, this will continue.
The only person you can change is yourself.
I highly recommend you join a ACOA or Al-Anon support group for your own well being.
You can get so much help from these groups, and advice on how to help yourself, your relationship, and how to deal with his addiction.
I hope you can get some help, dealing with and living under the abuse of an active, sick addict is something you do not deserve. I know you love him, but sometimes we have to love ourselves first, and have to remove ourselves from the addict in order for them to realize how sick they are.
You cannot control an addict in active addiction. Don't even try, or YOU will become an abused hurt and confused partner.