My son is detoxing from almost 1 month of heroin use

[Adoremyson]

Hi All,
I'm new to this forum but have been lurking for a few days and have been impressed by the support and compassion offered here.

I thought I was trying to educate myself for my sweet niece, 25 yrs old, ~5 yr Heroin habit, and now living on the streets after 1 failed 28-day in-patient detox and rehab 2 months ago. This has been devastating to my sister, my mom and I. Nobody has heard from her for several weeks. (My sister was about to go over the edge, so finally ended up starting on anti-depressants and anti-anxiety drugs. I dislike anything pharmaceutical, but I know it was better than the alternative for her.)

However, now I have another interest in being here. I just learned that after 1 year clean and making huge progress in his life, my 20-yr old son relapsed on Heroin for almost a month and just called to share this with me, and ask if he could come home and quit cold turkey, with my help. I would have never ever though this would happen, and it's devastating news, but I am happy that he caught himself and resolved with every fiber of his being to quit, because today he graduated from technical training, top of his class, interviewed with several companies yesterday, and has opportunities for great jobs ahead. He has every reason in the world to get off asap, so I know he's highly motivated. He's already been offered one job but is holding out for the best. He just has to get clean fast... but the right way, so he is really healthy mentally, physically, emotionally, and spiritually.

He will be starting tomorrow, using in the morning, working a few hours, then 3-1/3 hour bus and car ride to my house. I've been frantically trying to read up on every way to be ready to help him through this naturally, if possible. He has been doing research as well.

My question for the forum is, does anyone have any experience with someone withdrawing after only 3-1/2 weeks of smoking lower doses of Heroin? I am hoping to hear that the w/d will be less painful and shorter..?

Any other suggestions for getting through this are welcome as well. I know about all the physical issues, I actually think the depression might be the hardest though?

Thanks for any and all comments, and all the best to all of you. This is a hard road for everyone. But there is light at the end of the tunnel and I pray that everyone gets to that light!  Namaste.

[Adoremyson]

Hello there, and thanks for your comments and sharing stories of your own.  Jess I wish you much success as you go through this time of healing. You got this, believe it!  Pat, yes, thanks, there is a light at the end of the tunnel :-)

My son is through 4-1/2 days and doing as you would expect, maybe slightly better because of all of supplements, healthy meals and healthy environment, etc. Yesterday was a better day, tonight he's up and down (all the usual issues). Nights are always bad. All normal, I suppose. We talked a LOT yesterday during his good time, very good open and honest communication and information exchange on addiction. He is having a hard time getting motivated to exercise, although I keep encouraging him. The freezing cold outside doesn't help, when he's already chilling, but he did 10 minutes on the elliptical indoors a couple of days ago. Hot baths with Epsom salts have been helpful.  He remains positive about getting this done.

He hasn't physically felt like attending a meeting, but he said he will, and I will encourage it by this weekend. I've been emphasizing the importance of aftercare to him and sharing some of your comments.

Just an update so you know that we are making progress. He's strong and determined.

All the best to everyone here.  What a great community, to jump right in and offer support every day---thanks for lifting us up, I will do the same for you..... God bless you all.

[Pat1956100]

I hope all is going well.  Is there a light at the end of the tunnel?

[Ndetox]

Hi there! I have been reading the posts and now I'm going to reinforce what everyone is telling you about your son, yourself, and husband getting into an aftercare program. You will hear it over and over but it is so true... Getting clean is the easy part, staying clean is the hardest. I am a prime example! No matter how much I love God and love my family I continued to go back to using. I prayed, cried, and begged for this addiction to be ripped away from me. 4 yrs ago I broke down and told my family. I did not do any aftercare. Here I am again, detoxing from a large amount of oxy(synthetic heroin). I'm so embarrassed that I don't want to tell my mom. I don't want to let her down once again. I did come clean to my husband so I'm not totally alone. (Thank God) I did all the right things as far as cutting off contacts with all my friends, suppliers, doctors. I changes my number, had a good job, ect. The problem is that is as far as I went with it. I figured I could go at it alone. Each time I relapsed I took higher and higher doses. This is how a lot of people OD. It's a miracle that I am still alive. Addiction is a very serious issue and I thank God that I finally see that I can't do this alone. I'm praying for you and your family-Jess

[jifmoc]

Hi, glad you checked in, too.

You are an amazing Mom that's for sure. I don't wanna keep harping on this but I will anyway:) building a good life, random drug tests at work, new friends or a million dollars will not keep ANY addict sober. Unless he/she works a program. That's why after a year your son relapsed. He cannot, cannot, cannot (cannot) go back out there and do this alone. So, good that he is going to a meeting. He needs to go daily like IBKLEEN wrote.

Another thing, I hope you are not waiting on him while he is w/ you. This  experience needs to be a consequence of his actions. Resist the urge to ask him how he feels, what his symptoms are etc. I know that goes against every motherly urge you have. They call it detaching w/ love or tough love. He's not on vacation and he doesn't have the flu. He's experiencing the results of a heroin addiction.

And don't forget, tomorrow, go about your business. Same w/ your hubbie. No matter how sick he is.

Keep posting and let us know how you are.

[Krissy_123]

Hmmm I know for a fact I wouldn't have wanted anyone taping me going through my detox 3 weeks ago,I couldn't stand to be touched let alone video taped and stared at. But I deff hope it helps your son!! Everything you're doing for him is amazing btw! :)

[Adoremyson]

Hey y'all, thanks for staying in touch.  It's 11:30 PM, 39-1/2 hours into it. He is feeling pretty rough but we have been doing various things to help. He got up and had dinner with us, and we had a good discussion. My husband made it clear to him how hard this is on me. Hubby asked the question about how and why something like this can happen, when the consequences are known, so my son tried to explain to us how an addict's brain works when confronted with triggers, i.e. the internal arguing back and forth, rationalizing, etc. We also talked about going to meetings. I think we can go Tuesday (starting day 4), that's the only weekly Al-Anon meeting here, and there's an AA meeting nearby at the same time. My husband told him he wanted to film him each day so he would look at it and never want to use again. My son said that would probably be good, so later on my husband took a video when he was on the couch with RLS and twitching, and asked him a couple of questions. He will add more each day. Someday when he's sober and feeling wonderful, he can look at that when he wants to be reminded of what he never wants to experience again.

As for me, I'm good; just happy he is here and determined to get back to the successful life he was building for himself. He has to be clean to pursue this career, I think they sometimes have random drug tests at the job he wants, so I feel hopeful that it will be a good deterrent as well as his desire for a good life ahead, and his desire not to hurt people who love him. I know the next 3 days will be harder, but I think I'm ready.  And he is strong and determined. And we believe in prayer :-)