Aa
Narcotic Hell
I have no clue what to do? I am scared as hell, nervous and I am crying. I am a 22 year old male that has been taking pain pills for a good two years now. Recently I have been taking approximately 10-15 percocet a day....or the same ammount of vicodin, oxycodone, norco's, etc. I am abusing it and I know it. I just came to my senses Saturday and I am on my 2nd day of being clean....ahhhhhh! I feel so damn depressed, its unreal. Sweaty, sad, anxious, horrid thoughts. What is some advice on what I should do, cause right now I want to go spend money I don't have on pills....please help.
i've been trolling this site for the past year or so... 17 days ago, I decided to quit . for as long as i can remember i have been addicted to pain meds. you name it, i've taken it. for the last two years, i was taking 15-18 norco/day with a side of 30mg oxycodones. for some reason, of all the posts on here, jstn1357's made me decide to join the forum. 18 days ago, i would have told you there was absolutely no way i could quit cold turkey... but something clicked in my mind that made me really want to try. i've gotta believe that by getting on this site, you also want to try. you know you owe it to yourself to give it a shot.
what made it click for me was this: i couldn't remember what it felt lilke to feel normal without narcotic opiates. i could not remember what it felt like to not have to plan my week (life) around where and when i would get my next "batch"... that is no way to live your one and only life. opioids grab hold of you and grab hold of your life. they take away your social life and all your money. remember when a few 5mg vicodin would make you feel invincible and ultra-energetic? no matter how many pills you take, it will never be like that again... so what's the point? well, the point for me was to avoid withdrawals in the end. sadly, i gave up on idea that all those pills i was introducing to my liver were going to make me all itchy and talkative and fun... eventually, opiate addiction becomes 100% unsustainable. whether it's because of "money you dont have" - or you are eating more than the 480 norco/month you are prescribed (yes, scary) - there will never be enough to make you feel like you used to... you have to come to that realization. you're young and everyone around you is probably using... this makes it hard to stop. just remember, your well being is way more important than those dummies that are more or less stealing your money for a high that is unobtainable. save your money, save your liver, and get your life back... stay the course.
now - you asked for advice on what you should do... there are people on this site that have waaay more experience than myself for quitting opiates. i'm only on day 17. listen to them and keep asking questions. but, here's what i know:
you have age going for you... your metabolism is going to be your best friend.
when you hear people on this forum say "everyone is different"... that is super true. EVERYONE is different and we all go through this differently. for me, i finally had to reach out and tell family members about my unsustainable lust for opiates. it was a huge relief for me to tell someone (anyone). during the initial detox i experienced highs and lows (i.e. day 4 i felt great, day 6 i felt horrible..but the highs eventually outnumber the lows.... they have to). not everyone has this option, but i took a week off work (I own my own business - and figured my life was more important than the next client). a few days before i quit, i took notes on my blackberry about how i was feeling about opiates so that maybe during detox i could look back on my own reasons to quit and it would help me though... that was the best thing i did for myself. it's super easy to forget why you wanted to quit on day 3 and 4. then, i just toughed it out, read a lot of these people's stories on this website, spent massive amounts of time in the shower and/or bath, ate massive amounts of vitamins (the night before i quit, i went out and bought a bunch of comfort food, odwala "b-monster", b-complex supplement, gensing, red bull, multi-vitamins, immodium, alleve, etc). just remember, your body doesn't really absorb vitamins straight from supplements, so you have to eat as well. drink a ton of water to flush your system... and honestly, most importantly, make yourself get up and move around... i've been working out everyday (well, after day 3) - and the natural endorphine rush from that is actually much more pleasant than the one you get from 15 percocet... you don't necessarily jones for another workout within an hour :) . the worst part for me was the lack of sleep... by day ten, i was sleeping 6 hours/night... last night, i slept 8. i credit the exercise for this speedy redemption in sleep (avoid xanax and ambien if possible - those are just as addictive as opiates). when i was lying in bed "kicking", i'd just pull out my blackberry and read my own reasons for quitting, and read this forum.
jstn1357 - i will tell you this: for the first time in a really really really long time, i actually feel FREE. i'm still lethargic at times - but the way i get through it is i simply think of how many pills i would have to take just to get me going in the morning only 17 days ago. now I can't even imagine taking 5 norcos at once. just put some time between yourself and those damn pills... you owe it to yourself to try.
what made it click for me was this: i couldn't remember what it felt lilke to feel normal without narcotic opiates. i could not remember what it felt like to not have to plan my week (life) around where and when i would get my next "batch"... that is no way to live your one and only life. opioids grab hold of you and grab hold of your life. they take away your social life and all your money. remember when a few 5mg vicodin would make you feel invincible and ultra-energetic? no matter how many pills you take, it will never be like that again... so what's the point? well, the point for me was to avoid withdrawals in the end. sadly, i gave up on idea that all those pills i was introducing to my liver were going to make me all itchy and talkative and fun... eventually, opiate addiction becomes 100% unsustainable. whether it's because of "money you dont have" - or you are eating more than the 480 norco/month you are prescribed (yes, scary) - there will never be enough to make you feel like you used to... you have to come to that realization. you're young and everyone around you is probably using... this makes it hard to stop. just remember, your well being is way more important than those dummies that are more or less stealing your money for a high that is unobtainable. save your money, save your liver, and get your life back... stay the course.
now - you asked for advice on what you should do... there are people on this site that have waaay more experience than myself for quitting opiates. i'm only on day 17. listen to them and keep asking questions. but, here's what i know:
you have age going for you... your metabolism is going to be your best friend.
when you hear people on this forum say "everyone is different"... that is super true. EVERYONE is different and we all go through this differently. for me, i finally had to reach out and tell family members about my unsustainable lust for opiates. it was a huge relief for me to tell someone (anyone). during the initial detox i experienced highs and lows (i.e. day 4 i felt great, day 6 i felt horrible..but the highs eventually outnumber the lows.... they have to). not everyone has this option, but i took a week off work (I own my own business - and figured my life was more important than the next client). a few days before i quit, i took notes on my blackberry about how i was feeling about opiates so that maybe during detox i could look back on my own reasons to quit and it would help me though... that was the best thing i did for myself. it's super easy to forget why you wanted to quit on day 3 and 4. then, i just toughed it out, read a lot of these people's stories on this website, spent massive amounts of time in the shower and/or bath, ate massive amounts of vitamins (the night before i quit, i went out and bought a bunch of comfort food, odwala "b-monster", b-complex supplement, gensing, red bull, multi-vitamins, immodium, alleve, etc). just remember, your body doesn't really absorb vitamins straight from supplements, so you have to eat as well. drink a ton of water to flush your system... and honestly, most importantly, make yourself get up and move around... i've been working out everyday (well, after day 3) - and the natural endorphine rush from that is actually much more pleasant than the one you get from 15 percocet... you don't necessarily jones for another workout within an hour :) . the worst part for me was the lack of sleep... by day ten, i was sleeping 6 hours/night... last night, i slept 8. i credit the exercise for this speedy redemption in sleep (avoid xanax and ambien if possible - those are just as addictive as opiates). when i was lying in bed "kicking", i'd just pull out my blackberry and read my own reasons for quitting, and read this forum.
jstn1357 - i will tell you this: for the first time in a really really really long time, i actually feel FREE. i'm still lethargic at times - but the way i get through it is i simply think of how many pills i would have to take just to get me going in the morning only 17 days ago. now I can't even imagine taking 5 norcos at once. just put some time between yourself and those damn pills... you owe it to yourself to try.
Hi justin, you are at the right spot for some advice that could be very helpful for you. For a young man you did the right thing. And in a couple of weeks from now, you will be free from most of if not all the pain that you are going through right now as we type. As you have witnessed and felt from past times that you have stopped, it just doesn't get any better as the years pass us by. You try not to be hard on yourself right now and read what others with some experience have to say. The battle can be one with faith and patience. Take some long walks, visit the many sites on line that deal with being and staying clean, take a hot shower, drink a ton of water, take some vitamins, go to a meeting. God bless, keep in touch, 6 months clean, mike in nc
hi and welcome...congrats on getting your life back before 2 years turned into 20...what you are feeling is all part of the lovely opiate w/d....it s like a real bad flu physically and depression mentally...lasting 5 days for physical but mental might hang on a bit...i felt better in about 8 weeks which may seem like a lifetime to you but believe me it goes so quick when you stay determined...eat well, try some physical work even though you feel bad, and read the health pages...lots of helpful info there...(top right corner) be honest...it s nothing to be ashamed of...it happens to the best of peoples...and seek some sort of aftercare...keep posting..ask questions and stay very strong..good luck to you...maria
Just be honest! I know it is hard, but you could use some support! Secrets keep us sick in our addictions.
Hi and Welcome. In your first post you said "cause right now I want to go spend money I don't have on pills." And if you don't take a stand and stop you will do just that and dig yourself deeper into a place you do not want to be. You've got to decide if you really want to stop and if the desire to stop equal your desire to feel "the high." Which by the way will only diminish and require even more pills just to feel normal.
You are still very young and you have your whole life ahead of you. You could cut out so much aggrevation, pain, struggle, sickness, etc. if you put these nasty things down. I'm not understanding your comment "lifestyle fits so well." It must not or you would not be contemplating quitting opiat use.
If you really want to stop there are tons of people willing to help you. All you need to do is ask. Everyone one of us have been where you are right now and a lot of us ignored the initial warning our minds tried to tell us to go on to greater addiction.
I'm praying that you choose to stop. It's hard, but doable and so wonderful not to have to be a slave to pills. If you think about it you know you can't take them forever--really. One day if you're lucky you'll have to stop. Please do it now while your still quite young. Please continue to read and post. Keep us posted on how you're doing.
Blessings.....Rue
You are still very young and you have your whole life ahead of you. You could cut out so much aggrevation, pain, struggle, sickness, etc. if you put these nasty things down. I'm not understanding your comment "lifestyle fits so well." It must not or you would not be contemplating quitting opiat use.
If you really want to stop there are tons of people willing to help you. All you need to do is ask. Everyone one of us have been where you are right now and a lot of us ignored the initial warning our minds tried to tell us to go on to greater addiction.
I'm praying that you choose to stop. It's hard, but doable and so wonderful not to have to be a slave to pills. If you think about it you know you can't take them forever--really. One day if you're lucky you'll have to stop. Please do it now while your still quite young. Please continue to read and post. Keep us posted on how you're doing.
Blessings.....Rue
I know it will get better soon, but soon is not soon enough. Having to be here at work isn't helping either. I am trying to drink as much liquids as possible. How should I approach my girlfriend of 5 years about this? I am scared, so scared. It doesn't feel like I can change, this lifestyle fits so well. Thanks to everyone for chatting with me. Its helping a little. : (
Very proud of you for putting down the pills.... Big step on your journey to recovery!
One suggestion is to check out the Thomas Receipe...listed under Health pages... I did a modified version.. without the Valium and Immodium... and it helped me get thru the rough part... I was also taking 8-10 Norco a day for 3 years and went cold turkey.. I quit in August of 09 and haven't looked back...
The first week is the toughest... but you are young and NEED to do this... You have no other choice because you have sooooo much life ahead of you.. and I want you to enjoy it to it's fullest.... you can't do that if you are using....
So chin up dear,,,,, every day will get a little better and before you know it.. you will be whole again! Keep posting as we are all out here to help you in anyway that we can..
God Bless you and keep you!
NorcoQueen
One suggestion is to check out the Thomas Receipe...listed under Health pages... I did a modified version.. without the Valium and Immodium... and it helped me get thru the rough part... I was also taking 8-10 Norco a day for 3 years and went cold turkey.. I quit in August of 09 and haven't looked back...
The first week is the toughest... but you are young and NEED to do this... You have no other choice because you have sooooo much life ahead of you.. and I want you to enjoy it to it's fullest.... you can't do that if you are using....
So chin up dear,,,,, every day will get a little better and before you know it.. you will be whole again! Keep posting as we are all out here to help you in anyway that we can..
God Bless you and keep you!
NorcoQueen
Hey! IB is right. You will have to forge through this sometime to get off the pills. If you get more now, then you lose the last two days of misery and have to start ALL over another time to get clean! After abusing narcotics for 14 years, I am telling you that you need to do it now! I have been clean for over two months, and you will feel better soon like I do now.
Here is what you can do to help....stay hydrated with something like Gatorade or apple juice or water. Take hot baths in epsom salts. Use immodium for diarrhea. Advil for aches. Hylands Leg Cramps if you get RLS. It really works. Heating pad if you need it.
It will be over soon. It usually lasts about 4 or 5 days for the worst part. Keep posting!
Here is what you can do to help....stay hydrated with something like Gatorade or apple juice or water. Take hot baths in epsom salts. Use immodium for diarrhea. Advil for aches. Hylands Leg Cramps if you get RLS. It really works. Heating pad if you need it.
It will be over soon. It usually lasts about 4 or 5 days for the worst part. Keep posting!
Take a look at the thomas recipe link, it will give u a list of things to get to ease the withdrawal symptoms. Its really important for you at this stage of recovery to get some support systems set up that will help you through the depression and anxiety. For me, NA and AA meetings work wonders. Others prefer one on one addiction counseling. No matter what you decide to do, its important to do something. White knuckling it will only take you so far. You'll find that talking with other addicts who have been there and made it to the other side is some of the best therapy around. Most important, whatever happens, do not use. Once you get through the first few days, you will start to feel better. Hang in there, keep posting. We're here for you. We can do this!
Hi & Welcome,
Congrats on putting the pills down. The first week is the hardest as far as the physical withdrawal goes. All of those things will continue for the next few days and it is normal for detox. It is like having the flu. Know that it will get better and it will go away if you stick with it.
If you go get more pills now you will eventually have to go through this again and, believe me, it doesn't get any easier the second time around.
Some of the things you can do right now to relax yourself is to take hot baths, try and relax in your favorite chair---watch a movie. Be sure to stay hydrated and push food even if it is something small.
Keep posting and talking with the members here and they will walk you through this. Hang on.
Congrats on putting the pills down. The first week is the hardest as far as the physical withdrawal goes. All of those things will continue for the next few days and it is normal for detox. It is like having the flu. Know that it will get better and it will go away if you stick with it.
If you go get more pills now you will eventually have to go through this again and, believe me, it doesn't get any easier the second time around.
Some of the things you can do right now to relax yourself is to take hot baths, try and relax in your favorite chair---watch a movie. Be sure to stay hydrated and push food even if it is something small.
Keep posting and talking with the members here and they will walk you through this. Hang on.
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