Opinions from Oxy Addicts Please??

[HollyCat416]

My husband...opiate addict....60 percs, 300mg oxy + valium, ativan, clonazepam + ritalin DAILY... about 4 weeks ago I asked him a simple question on a touchy subject...he flew off the handle and left me. I knew there was a possibility of us having an argument but he freaked out and broke up with me...left me and the kids.  I'm still in disbelief that our family is broken up because he didn't like a question that I asked.  I can only attribute the extreme reaction to his addiction....I have second guessed myself on pretty well everything and crazy behaviour just seems so normal to me these days.  Am I right??  Do the pills make him lose his temper even on the most minor of issues?  I think I'm losing my mind.

[HollyCat416]

thank you for your words from experience...from the few al anon meetings and therapy sessions I have gone to, I think I'm finally at a place where I'm at peace with the situation and don't feel responsible for what is happening....things will work out the way they do and I will have learned a life lesson as a result...best of luck to you and your wife...thanks again

[HollyCat416]

thanks for the support...this site has been extremely helpful...wish you the best of luck.  I will be ok.

[quitinoxys]

I feel bad about what you are going through, in my earlier post I just wanted you to know that the drugs turn u into ur evil twin. If he is not ready to get off then you cannot help him. He has to do that for himself. As him trying to make u feel like u are the reason for his stress it is refusal to stand up and admit he is an addict. As far as him putting u in your place and he is the bread winner without u he probably won't have a nice clean home to come. Being a homemaker is a job too!!!. So I sympathize with u an I will pray for you. I hope this encouragement helps u a little.  

[hurtininnc]

hi and welcome first of all i know its hard but try not to beat yourself up over this until he is ready to quit no matter what you say or what you do it will not make a difference these drugs make for irrational thinking and in his mind everything is ok he has to want to quit i know i am an addict that has been tapering for a week of from a 3 yr adddiction to oxycodone and just in the last week i have noticed a change in my own thinking and so has my wife she knows when im high or not shes seen it enough to know as im sure you have also,you just have to hang in there and let him find out whats more important the junk or his family i wish you well keep posting you will find a ton of support from people who have went through the same thing take care and God bless Craig  

[HollyCat416]

I know I should really be in an Al Anon support group for all of this, but I was trying to just get some clarification from people who were in his position who have been there and are trying to get better.  I don't want to sound cold or anything, but I can't put him first anymore.  I did for years and it got me nowhere.  He won't even admit to having a problem yet it's progressing at lightspeed.  When I have mentioned anything regarding his pills, I've been berated and insulted to no end.  It always gets turned around and somehow I'm either to blame for the stress that he endures or I get reminded of my place in the family, since he is the breadwinner.  When he is ready, I'll be here but he is nowhere near ready and I have children to care for.  Thanks for your input.

[HollyCat416]

thanks for your comment...other than the disbelief I'm in that my marriage is ending because of this....I HAVE turned this into a positive, surprisingly enough.  I feel like for the first time in many years, I'm not holding my breath or walking on eggshells.  Part of me is relieved that it was HIM that left me....although I still feel a bit imprisoned, at least now I don't feel completely guilty that I'm not taking care of him.  And I think I still have some sanity left in me.

[HollyCat416]

you're correct..the percs are 5mg but the acetaminophen in 60 is definitely way over the daily limit....not to mention the 40 mg oxy pills he munches on every few hours.  I asked him about a phone call he received....apparently it was a touch subject for him, but in a normal relationship, it wouldn't be grounds for divorce.

[HollyCat416]

hi..yes, 60 percs in addition to the oxy's.  His liver is probably black from the acetaminephen in the percs but he manages to function and fool the rest of the world.  He's been on pills for years, but just graduated to this level in the last 10 months or so.  And I'm doing ok...just numb and in shock.  Thanks for asking.

[sway1]

benzos, ativan valium clonaz. etc., tend to make people mean and nasty after just a few days of use. until he gets clean, you are dealing w/ an addiction, not a person. try to turn him being gone into a positive! best of luck, sway

[quitinoxys]

Opioid addiction makes people say and do things that they normally wouldn't. You should try to open up a dialogue with him and try to understand the pain of addiction he is going through. I know i can b a real jerk sometimes to my wife when i'm on this crap. So hang in there and be there for him.

[AJRC323]

The percs were probably only 5mg. But personally, opiates do the opposite, so who knows. Depends on the person. What did you ask him anyway?

[deeblake41]

OH my! I am SURE it is the meds! is this a typo or does he really take 60 percs a day??????? I have never heard of anyone doing that and living. I am semi new to opiates and HATE this mess I am in myself. I hope he gets the help he needs:(
How are you doing through all this?

D~