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Part two of the aftercare search

I HATE THIS TOWN!  I have spent so much time trying to find an acceptable meeting, I looked up SMART, but they seem to be out of Houston which is too far to drive for me, I joined an online NA meeting which was a total joke. I am so frustrated, It will take weeks to get into the therapist that my insurance will cover, plus I want a small group setting. This is the first time in 12 days that I would consider using. I know yall are thinking what a spoiled brat! Maybe I am , but my emotions are so raw right now and all I want to do is help myself, but this stupid backwoods mother******* town is preventing that. Im sorry guys I really needed to get this out. Maybe aftercare isn't going to help me anyway, The Universe is pointing me in the opposite direction. Plus I have yall. Im sure people have gotten clean by themselves before.  
XXX Carrie
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Avatar universal
Remember the triggers to a relapse:  People, Places & Things.  

AND...H.A.L.T.  (Hungry, Angry, Lonely, Tired).  

Don't let People trigger Angry and make you start using again.   Stamp your feet in the ground and CLAIM your sobriety.  It is YOURS, Anne...no one, and I mean NOT ONE D*MN PERSON can take it away from you.  

That clean time is precious gold.  Guard it with care.  

If meetings are stressing you, don't go to them.  Volunteer somewhere that has NO chance of you using...a pet shelter, or the library, or see if your town has recycling or clean-up.  Maybe the local schools have a volunteer program.  Anything that gets you involved with people around something that ISN'T getting high.

You can do this honey.  We all invent our program.   Just don't use again.  Take that anger and get mad at the drugs, at the addiction.  

I'm glad you came on here and vented.  Don't let that garbage stay down inside you...it ends up rotting out your insides...Good for you!!
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Avatar universal
I believe support and especially one addict helping another is the most important thing for recovery but it will always come down to the choice an addict makes for themselves
Helpful - 0
11130923 tn?1415560519
Take your child to the meetings. My AA group..closed or open..has women bringing babies and small children. It can be done. I have found such solace in going to meetings. At first I thought it would make me crave using or make me angry. Now, they are an important part of my day. I go to 1-2 meetings a day. Everyone's recovery is different. Yes, there will be people at your meeting that are court-ordered to be there. There will also be people that might be high, might be trying to deal, and might be looking to hook up. Just remind yourself that you are there for your sobriety. Your sobriety is Number 1...above anything and everyone else. Good luck!
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Avatar universal
I agree! Jethro makes some good points! I am going to try it, and see what happens. Here is a big concern of mine. I live in an area that is right off I-10, drugs are everywhere you look. I have a few friends,(I use that term loosely) that go to NA, some for court some to stay "sober" I said before in a previous post, that all these people from high school talk about how cool their partying days were, some go to meetings high, and some deal AT MEETINGS! This is the root of my terror.I don't want to sit in a meeting thinking about drugs for an hour, then want to go use. I am going to give it a go, but hopefully I can get into a private practice. Thank all of you for your insight, I think you would see my point if you lived here and had to deal with these people.NA here is kind of a joke, years ago they had a child molester running the meetings, FOR REAL xoxo Carrie
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Avatar universal
Hey Carrie, i hope you find what your looking for and it doesnt cause you too much stress !!!
I really like Jethro's comments, i think he has some very valid points and as he sais, hes not knocking it and neither am i !!!
The program of NA or AA is highly respected and has kept many people from falling.... I agree !!
As bizzare as it seems to many, i went to rehab a few times and attended NA every evening for a long time and kept relapsing.
The longest i was ever clean was 3 weeks.
This time, i didnt do NA and this is the longest ive been clean ever.
So all im saying, is you will find what works for you sooner or later.
Meetings can help you to come out of your shell once you start going and have been there a while.
The good thing about meetings, is everyone is equal and going through what you are. You may find once you find one thats acceptable and to your needs, that you cant live without it.
I just hate the fact that attending or not attending meetings is so controvercial.
Anyway, good luck finding a meeting, its fantastic to see you are trying so hard to stay clean.
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Avatar universal
Hi  well im a big perponet of N/A after your there a wile you will see people with 15 or 20ys clean and they still go to meetings the pills are a outward side of a inward problem there only a symptom... as addicts we will be bombarded with life on lifes terms and looked for a ez way to feel ok and drugs did that for us  but at what cost...you will find that this is a progressive illness that only gets worst with time it can however be arrested and then recovery is possible I have friends that have stopped yr ago but they still act and think like a addict the meetings and the 12 steps will teach you how to live and help you fix the train wreck that addiction brings seeking aftercare is critical to this disease its ends are jails institutions and death it is time to take your life back and this program will give you structure something most addicts dont have I wish you well your on the right track go to several meetings b/4 you decide there are a lot of our members that where saved by the N/A program.....Gnarly
Helpful - 0
4898964 tn?1381257899
Hey, I'm not knocking it :)  I reckon if you wanna go, do it.  Anyone can give an opinion that's why we live in a democracy.  I'm only saying that not everyone finds it necessary.  What do you want me to say?  If you don't go you're damned?  If there was no meeting to go to it would be a rather awkward situation don't you think.

By taking action I'm meaning she's actually taking action so that is what is important.  Not that it's not important to go, I'm sorry if that wasn't clear.  As we can see now, there is more information to act upon and that "closed" meeting is just what the OP is looking for but didn't know it.
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Avatar universal
I went back and did more research and found several addiction counselors and a few more meetings, I will be going this week. Thank you for your insight and concern .XX C.
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Avatar universal
You are right and I just spent a lot of time researching therapists and another na place that may work out, its just a little further away, but no big deal. I want to be recovered too, and I will just keep on searching, even if I have to start my own meeting! XXX C.
Helpful - 0
3197167 tn?1348968606
You don't need to go to a meeting designated for "newcomers".....newcomers are welcome at ANY meeting.

An "open" meeting means that anyone can attend....even those that are not addicts....like students, loved ones of addicts, those wanting to learn about addiction, etc.
A "closed" meeting is for those that believe they have a drug problem or believe themselves to be an addict.

An online meeting is NOTHING like one in person.

If you go to this website and type in Beaumont, TX and select within 10 miles as your search area....you will find 26 meetings in your area.  Some are at Noon, others in the evening ranging from 6:30 pm to 8:00 pm

http://www.na.org/MeetingSearch/

There are MANY options for aftercare.....but those that don't have any usually relapse....or if they don't, they are still isolating and miserable.  
Please don't be so quick to decide "ahead of time".....do as suggested and try on different types of aftercare like a pair of shoes.  And as with a pair of shoes, I usually have to walk in them more than one "outing" before I know how they feel.

Decide for yourself what works best for YOU....but don't eliminate an avenue of recovery until you have tried it.  The ones that haven't tried something certainly have no business sharing an opinion about it.
Don't knock it until you have tried it is my motto~
Helpful - 0
7163794 tn?1457366813
COMMUNITY LEADER
Lol...i live in backasswards hickville LA so, i hear ya. I actually found we have a "clubhouse" that holds meetings all day, every day. I went to some in the beginning to find they were 97% AA and the NA were a little tricky to find. There not all at this clubhouse, there all over town, and in all of the towns surrounding me. Husband and baby will make it hard....so bring baby with u?? We have women that do it all the time...we do what it takes, right?
This is what i think about when i get frustrated...if all it took was will power, how did i get in the hole i put myself in? Im just not one to believe that an addict can recover on their own??? But again, just my opinion. I want more than to be clean....i want recovery! :)
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Avatar universal
Not so much small, just backwards rednecks, it is the most unprogressive place I have ever lived, there are not many resources for people in need of any mental health services.
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Avatar universal
I found one NA place in this entire town, the times are not ideal because of my daughters school schedule and my husbands job, he is barely here, he works 12 hour shifts, many graveyards, and we don't have the luxury of family or  to help. The one I found that I could go to was not for newcomers and it said it was a closed meeting whatever that means. I just need to keep looking.
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Avatar universal
Thanks Jethro, I had myself a little freak out. I am so new to this sober thing, It is all new to me, I spent 3/4 of my life high, so...you know. I am going to keep looking and just do my best, this site seems to be helping me the most right now,. I am not really a "joiner" never have been. Ill just kepp researching and see what happens. XXX C. Again, Thanks for your support!
Helpful - 0
4898964 tn?1381257899
Yea, that's good question considering I've even got one in this tiny 2K population town I'm in.  Is your town really that small Carrie?
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7163794 tn?1457366813
COMMUNITY LEADER
What did u find as far as AA or NA in your local area?
Helpful - 0
4898964 tn?1381257899
Hey Carrie, don't stress about it too much.  Meetings are recommended here, but I wouldn't say they are 100% necessary.  Different strokes for different folks and all that.  I've never been to one, not my cup of tea, and I'm pretty sure there's a few other peeps here in the same boat.

No one is preventing you from helping yourself, by taking action you already are dontcha know.  The town is preventing you going to a meeting, that's it, no need to attach extra energy :)  
Helpful - 0
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