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Question about Relapsing
I've been clean for about 27-28 days now. I was using norcos off and on for about 2 years. The previous 7 months I was taking 10 x 10/325 a day and started to take précis and Oxys
I'm proud of how far I've come and I feel confident I'm done with the pills. But as the advice was given to me detoxing is easy the long term is hard.
I've deleted all my contacts I cut all my connections, i've been using this forum to remind me that I'm not normal. I've been looking for triggers, and how I can deal with them.
My question is, when does the craving start again? I know it's different for everybody but just curious what others felt. What were the strongest triggers for people? What were your best counters against these triggers?
As always I appreciate everyone's advice. You guys have been my light during my dark hours.
I'm proud of how far I've come and I feel confident I'm done with the pills. But as the advice was given to me detoxing is easy the long term is hard.
I've deleted all my contacts I cut all my connections, i've been using this forum to remind me that I'm not normal. I've been looking for triggers, and how I can deal with them.
My question is, when does the craving start again? I know it's different for everybody but just curious what others felt. What were the strongest triggers for people? What were your best counters against these triggers?
As always I appreciate everyone's advice. You guys have been my light during my dark hours.
Thank you to ActingBrandNew AND to you, Defco!!!
GREAT THREAD....full of VERY GOOD INFORMATION~
GREAT THREAD....full of VERY GOOD INFORMATION~
Thank you for the post! Very informative! Thank everyone for their post! Not a day goes by I don't check into MH, to help me stay my course. The information and support here is amazing. So many people with great advice!
Reading up on post acute withdrawel, it says can take 2 years and when we think it's shorter then hits us we may get disappointed and create a higher chance to relapse. Is this true for all withdrawels? Regardless of how long they were using?
During detox I used Xanax at night. I went from the whole bar and tapered to 1/4 bar. I replaced them with melatonin and I've been clean from those about a week now. Reading about benzo withdrawels were eye opening as well, I'm glad I stopped those too.
The more questions that get answered the more questions I have. I successfully quit meth in the past but learning about addiction and my own addictive mind has made me realize there's still a lot I need to learn/do to be clean.
Here's some counters for post acute withdrawels;
How to Survive Post-Acute Withdrawal
Be patient. You can't hurry recovery. But you can get through it one day at a time. If you resent post-acute withdrawal, or try to bulldoze your way through it, you will become exhausted. And when you're exhausted you will think of using to escape.
Post-acute withdrawal symptoms are a sign that your brain is recovering. Therefore don't resent them. But remember, even after one year, you are still only half way there.
Go with the flow. Withdrawal symptoms are uncomfortable. But the more you resent them the worse they'll seem. You'll have lots of good days over the next two years. Enjoy them. You'll also have lots of bad days. On those days, don't try to do too much. Take care of yourself, focus on your recovery, and you'll get through this.
Practice self-care. Give yourself lots of little breaks over the next two years. Tell yourself "what I am doing is enough." Be good to yourself. That is what most addicts can't do, and that's what you must learn in recovery. Recovery is the opposite of addiction.
Sometimes you'll have little energy or enthusiasm for anything. Understand this and don't over book your life. Give yourself permission to focus on your recovery.
Post-acute withdrawal can be a trigger for relapse. You'll go for weeks without any withdrawal symptoms, and then one day you'll wake up and your withdrawal will hit you like a ton of bricks. You'll have slept badly. You'll be in a bad mood. Your energy will be low. And if you're not prepared for it, if you think that post-acute withdrawal only lasts for a few months, or if you think that you'll be different and it won't be as bad for you, then you'll get caught off guard. But if you know what to expect you can do this.
Being able to relax will help you through post-acute withdrawal. When you're tense you tend to dwell on your symptoms and make them worse. When you're relaxed it's easier to not get caught up in them. You aren't as triggered by your symptoms which means you're less likely to relapse.
Remember, every relapse, no matter how small undoes the gains your brain has made during recovery. Without abstinence everything will fall apart. With abstinence everything is possible. (Reference: www.AddictionsAndRecovery.org)
Reading up on post acute withdrawel, it says can take 2 years and when we think it's shorter then hits us we may get disappointed and create a higher chance to relapse. Is this true for all withdrawels? Regardless of how long they were using?
During detox I used Xanax at night. I went from the whole bar and tapered to 1/4 bar. I replaced them with melatonin and I've been clean from those about a week now. Reading about benzo withdrawels were eye opening as well, I'm glad I stopped those too.
The more questions that get answered the more questions I have. I successfully quit meth in the past but learning about addiction and my own addictive mind has made me realize there's still a lot I need to learn/do to be clean.
Here's some counters for post acute withdrawels;
How to Survive Post-Acute Withdrawal
Be patient. You can't hurry recovery. But you can get through it one day at a time. If you resent post-acute withdrawal, or try to bulldoze your way through it, you will become exhausted. And when you're exhausted you will think of using to escape.
Post-acute withdrawal symptoms are a sign that your brain is recovering. Therefore don't resent them. But remember, even after one year, you are still only half way there.
Go with the flow. Withdrawal symptoms are uncomfortable. But the more you resent them the worse they'll seem. You'll have lots of good days over the next two years. Enjoy them. You'll also have lots of bad days. On those days, don't try to do too much. Take care of yourself, focus on your recovery, and you'll get through this.
Practice self-care. Give yourself lots of little breaks over the next two years. Tell yourself "what I am doing is enough." Be good to yourself. That is what most addicts can't do, and that's what you must learn in recovery. Recovery is the opposite of addiction.
Sometimes you'll have little energy or enthusiasm for anything. Understand this and don't over book your life. Give yourself permission to focus on your recovery.
Post-acute withdrawal can be a trigger for relapse. You'll go for weeks without any withdrawal symptoms, and then one day you'll wake up and your withdrawal will hit you like a ton of bricks. You'll have slept badly. You'll be in a bad mood. Your energy will be low. And if you're not prepared for it, if you think that post-acute withdrawal only lasts for a few months, or if you think that you'll be different and it won't be as bad for you, then you'll get caught off guard. But if you know what to expect you can do this.
Being able to relax will help you through post-acute withdrawal. When you're tense you tend to dwell on your symptoms and make them worse. When you're relaxed it's easier to not get caught up in them. You aren't as triggered by your symptoms which means you're less likely to relapse.
Remember, every relapse, no matter how small undoes the gains your brain has made during recovery. Without abstinence everything will fall apart. With abstinence everything is possible. (Reference: www.AddictionsAndRecovery.org)
Awesome advice here-
Just wanted to add that there are many forms of aftercare and you need to do some research to find out what works for YOU. The only guidance I can give is that it is crucial to have REAL life support. This forum is a God Send but those that get clean and stay clean all engage in some form of aftercare.
For me this was drug counselling, EMDR for PTSD, CBT, and a support group at a Women's Centre which i am now a leader in.
But whatever you do, get some real life peeps involved in your recovery and surround yourself with them (I think of it as my CLEAN ARMY) so that if you have a moment of weakness or a craving that just won't pass you can call someone, go for coffee, or just be with so you don't have to be alone.
Wishing you the best missy, You Deserve It.
Lu
Just wanted to add that there are many forms of aftercare and you need to do some research to find out what works for YOU. The only guidance I can give is that it is crucial to have REAL life support. This forum is a God Send but those that get clean and stay clean all engage in some form of aftercare.
For me this was drug counselling, EMDR for PTSD, CBT, and a support group at a Women's Centre which i am now a leader in.
But whatever you do, get some real life peeps involved in your recovery and surround yourself with them (I think of it as my CLEAN ARMY) so that if you have a moment of weakness or a craving that just won't pass you can call someone, go for coffee, or just be with so you don't have to be alone.
Wishing you the best missy, You Deserve It.
Lu
OMG, that breakdown was fantastic. I'm in awe. Exactly what I need because I am back here after relapsing quite a bit.
I may copy and paste that and print it out, and put it on my mirror!
I may copy and paste that and print it out, and put it on my mirror!
Thank you for the questions, and to the people who answered. Great information for all.
Hey great post actingbrandnew any ways your off to a great start Defco ...now I have tried a lot of different aftercare my pastor a shrink and a substance abuse counselor most worked a little bit but a dope fiend like me needed more my Saving grace was finding the rooms of Na and recamend it to every one it will change the very way you think of addiction as well as a great place to make new friend that are clean I still go to 4 meetings a week after doing my 90 meetings in 90 days..(was my sponcers idea) any way those that go to meetings stay clean it is often said ''with a addict to my right and a addict to my left we rarely fall'' this is the best thing you can do for your recovery give it a shot...Gnarly
congrats on your 28 days .should be proud of your self! as far as triggers go it could be anything at anytime. a certain place may set you off, a person could do the same, smells have set me off before .you just have to fight thru it put your mind somewhere else. go to as many meetings as you can . the fight has really just begun, believe me relapse is real and right around the corner. one false step and your right back where you started from only with a stronger addiction. good luck !! peace out!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
The Stages of Relapse
Relapse is a process, it's not an event. In order to understand relapse prevention you have to understand the stages of relapse. Relapse starts weeks or even months before the event of physical relapse. In this page you will learn how to use specific relapse prevention techniques for each stage of relapse. There are three stages of relapse.(1)
Emotional relapse
Mental relapse
Physical relapse
Emotional Relapse
In emotional relapse, you're not thinking about using. But your emotions and behaviors are setting you up for a possible relapse in the future.
The signs of emotional relapse are:
Anxiety
Intolerance
Anger
Defensiveness
Mood swings
Isolation
Not asking for help
Not going to meetings
Poor eating habits
Poor sleep habits
The signs of emotional relapse are also the symptoms of post-acute withdrawal. If you understand post-acute withdrawal it's easier to avoid relapse, because the early stage of relapse is easiest to pull back from. In the later stages the pull of relapse gets stronger and the sequence of events moves faster.
Early Relapse Prevention
Relapse prevention at this stage means recognizing that you're in emotional relapse and changing your behavior. Recognize that you're isolating and remind yourself to ask for help. Recognize that you're anxious and practice relaxation techniques. Recognize that your sleep and eating habits are slipping and practice self-care.
If you don't change your behavior at this stage and you live too long in the stage of emotional relapse you'll become exhausted, and when you're exhausted you will want to escape, which will move you into mental relapse.
Practice self-care. The most important thing you can do to prevent relapse at this stage is take better care of yourself. Think about why you use. You use drugs or alcohol to escape, relax, or reward yourself. Therefore you relapse when you don't take care of yourself and create situations that are mentally and emotionally draining that make you want to escape.
For example, if you don't take care of yourself and eat poorly or have poor sleep habits, you'll feel exhausted and want to escape. If you don't let go of your resentments and fears through some form of relaxation, they will build to the point where you'll feel uncomfortable in your own skin. If you don't ask for help, you'll feel isolated. If any of those situations continues for too long, you will begin to think about using. But if you practice self-care, you can avoid those feelings from growing and avoid relapse. (Reference: www.AddictionsAndRecovery.org)
Mental Relapse
In mental relapse there's a war going on in your mind. Part of you wants to use, but part of you doesn't. In the early phase of mental relapse you're just idly thinking about using. But in the later phase you're definitely thinking about using.
The signs of mental relapse are:
Thinking about people, places, and things you used with
Glamorizing your past use
Lying
Hanging out with old using friends
Fantasizing about using
Thinking about relapsing
Planning your relapse around other people's schedules
It gets harder to make the right choices as the pull of addiction gets stronger.
Techniques for Dealing with Mental Urges
Play the tape through. When you think about using, the fantasy is that you'll be able to control your use this time. You'll just have one drink. But play the tape through. One drink usually leads to more drinks. You'll wake up the next day feeling disappointed in yourself. You may not be able to stop the next day, and you'll get caught in the same vicious cycle. When you play that tape through to its logical conclusion, using doesn't seem so appealing.
A common mental urge is that you can get away with using, because no one will know if you relapse. Perhaps your spouse is away for the weekend, or you're away on a trip. That's when your addiction will try to convince you that you don't have a big problem, and that you're really doing your recovery to please your spouse or your work. Play the tape through. Remind yourself of the negative consequences you've already suffered, and the potential consequences that lie around the corner if you relapse again. If you could control your use, you would have done it by now.
Tell someone that you're having urges to use. Call a friend, a support, or someone in recovery. Share with them what you're going through. The magic of sharing is that the minute you start to talk about what you're thinking and feeling, your urges begin to disappear. They don't seem quite as big and you don't feel as alone.
Distract yourself. When you think about using, do something to occupy yourself. Call a friend. Go to a meeting. Get up and go for a walk. If you just sit there with your urge and don't do anything, you're giving your mental relapse room to grow.
Wait for 30 minutes. Most urges usually last for less than 15 to 30 minutes. When you're in an urge, it feels like an eternity. But if you can keep yourself busy and do the things you're supposed to do, it'll quickly be gone.
Do your recovery one day at a time. Don't think about whether you can stay abstinent forever. That's a paralyzing thought. It's overwhelming even for people who've been in recovery for a long time.
One day at a time, means you should match your goals to your emotional strength. When you feel strong and you're motivated to not use, then tell yourself that you won't use for the next week or the next month. But when you're struggling and having lots of urges, and those times will happen often, tell yourself that you won't use for today or for the next 30 minutes. Do your recovery in bite-sized chunks and don't sabotage yourself by thinking too far ahead.
Make relaxation part of your recovery. Relaxation is an important part of relapse prevention, because when you're tense you tend to do what’s familiar and wrong, instead of what's new and right. When you're tense you tend to repeat the same mistakes you made before. When you're relaxed you are more open to change. (Reference: www.AddictionsAndRecovery.org)
Physical Relapse
Once you start thinking about relapse, if you don't use some of the techniques mentioned above, it doesn't take long to go from there to physical relapse. Driving to the liquor store. Driving to your dealer.
It's hard to stop the process of relapse at that point. That's not where you should focus your efforts in recovery. That's achieving abstinence through brute force. But it is not recovery. If you recognize the early warning signs of relapse, and understand the symptoms of post-acute withdrawal, you'll be able to catch yourself before it's too late.
Relapse is a process, it's not an event. In order to understand relapse prevention you have to understand the stages of relapse. Relapse starts weeks or even months before the event of physical relapse. In this page you will learn how to use specific relapse prevention techniques for each stage of relapse. There are three stages of relapse.(1)
Emotional relapse
Mental relapse
Physical relapse
Emotional Relapse
In emotional relapse, you're not thinking about using. But your emotions and behaviors are setting you up for a possible relapse in the future.
The signs of emotional relapse are:
Anxiety
Intolerance
Anger
Defensiveness
Mood swings
Isolation
Not asking for help
Not going to meetings
Poor eating habits
Poor sleep habits
The signs of emotional relapse are also the symptoms of post-acute withdrawal. If you understand post-acute withdrawal it's easier to avoid relapse, because the early stage of relapse is easiest to pull back from. In the later stages the pull of relapse gets stronger and the sequence of events moves faster.
Early Relapse Prevention
Relapse prevention at this stage means recognizing that you're in emotional relapse and changing your behavior. Recognize that you're isolating and remind yourself to ask for help. Recognize that you're anxious and practice relaxation techniques. Recognize that your sleep and eating habits are slipping and practice self-care.
If you don't change your behavior at this stage and you live too long in the stage of emotional relapse you'll become exhausted, and when you're exhausted you will want to escape, which will move you into mental relapse.
Practice self-care. The most important thing you can do to prevent relapse at this stage is take better care of yourself. Think about why you use. You use drugs or alcohol to escape, relax, or reward yourself. Therefore you relapse when you don't take care of yourself and create situations that are mentally and emotionally draining that make you want to escape.
For example, if you don't take care of yourself and eat poorly or have poor sleep habits, you'll feel exhausted and want to escape. If you don't let go of your resentments and fears through some form of relaxation, they will build to the point where you'll feel uncomfortable in your own skin. If you don't ask for help, you'll feel isolated. If any of those situations continues for too long, you will begin to think about using. But if you practice self-care, you can avoid those feelings from growing and avoid relapse. (Reference: www.AddictionsAndRecovery.org)
Mental Relapse
In mental relapse there's a war going on in your mind. Part of you wants to use, but part of you doesn't. In the early phase of mental relapse you're just idly thinking about using. But in the later phase you're definitely thinking about using.
The signs of mental relapse are:
Thinking about people, places, and things you used with
Glamorizing your past use
Lying
Hanging out with old using friends
Fantasizing about using
Thinking about relapsing
Planning your relapse around other people's schedules
It gets harder to make the right choices as the pull of addiction gets stronger.
Techniques for Dealing with Mental Urges
Play the tape through. When you think about using, the fantasy is that you'll be able to control your use this time. You'll just have one drink. But play the tape through. One drink usually leads to more drinks. You'll wake up the next day feeling disappointed in yourself. You may not be able to stop the next day, and you'll get caught in the same vicious cycle. When you play that tape through to its logical conclusion, using doesn't seem so appealing.
A common mental urge is that you can get away with using, because no one will know if you relapse. Perhaps your spouse is away for the weekend, or you're away on a trip. That's when your addiction will try to convince you that you don't have a big problem, and that you're really doing your recovery to please your spouse or your work. Play the tape through. Remind yourself of the negative consequences you've already suffered, and the potential consequences that lie around the corner if you relapse again. If you could control your use, you would have done it by now.
Tell someone that you're having urges to use. Call a friend, a support, or someone in recovery. Share with them what you're going through. The magic of sharing is that the minute you start to talk about what you're thinking and feeling, your urges begin to disappear. They don't seem quite as big and you don't feel as alone.
Distract yourself. When you think about using, do something to occupy yourself. Call a friend. Go to a meeting. Get up and go for a walk. If you just sit there with your urge and don't do anything, you're giving your mental relapse room to grow.
Wait for 30 minutes. Most urges usually last for less than 15 to 30 minutes. When you're in an urge, it feels like an eternity. But if you can keep yourself busy and do the things you're supposed to do, it'll quickly be gone.
Do your recovery one day at a time. Don't think about whether you can stay abstinent forever. That's a paralyzing thought. It's overwhelming even for people who've been in recovery for a long time.
One day at a time, means you should match your goals to your emotional strength. When you feel strong and you're motivated to not use, then tell yourself that you won't use for the next week or the next month. But when you're struggling and having lots of urges, and those times will happen often, tell yourself that you won't use for today or for the next 30 minutes. Do your recovery in bite-sized chunks and don't sabotage yourself by thinking too far ahead.
Make relaxation part of your recovery. Relaxation is an important part of relapse prevention, because when you're tense you tend to do what’s familiar and wrong, instead of what's new and right. When you're tense you tend to repeat the same mistakes you made before. When you're relaxed you are more open to change. (Reference: www.AddictionsAndRecovery.org)
Physical Relapse
Once you start thinking about relapse, if you don't use some of the techniques mentioned above, it doesn't take long to go from there to physical relapse. Driving to the liquor store. Driving to your dealer.
It's hard to stop the process of relapse at that point. That's not where you should focus your efforts in recovery. That's achieving abstinence through brute force. But it is not recovery. If you recognize the early warning signs of relapse, and understand the symptoms of post-acute withdrawal, you'll be able to catch yourself before it's too late.
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