It's been several months since I first posted here in such desperation, and overwhelming fear of detoxing " Cold Turkey " from 150mg patches every 48 hrs, along with large amounts of Vicodine prescribed 5 years back for so called acute back pain as a result of 2 bulging disks in my T2/T3 spinal area which at the end of my use was abusing my patches leaving them on 3 days and doubling up on them which could have killed me.
Today I am 7 months clean of all substances thanks to the guidance of many on this forum. I felt it only appropriate to post my progress to those just beginning their journey. Before I began my recovery my prescribing Dr abruptly dropped me as a patient after a 13 year relationship, before I was abusing my meds. And had to turn to a family friend, a physician to help me as no Dr would accept me on both drugs, now being labeled an addict. I had not began to abuse my meds until they stopped working well into working with my new Dr who was less than thrilled about just prescribing. And who also had little knowledge about how to detox me accept to offer me soboxone which I declined knowing that any other substances added would lead to other detoxes down the road.
Now before I go further, it was a personal choice to detox cold turkey which I can tell you was intencly harsh, so this may not be suggested as the best way, but if there is no choice, It can be done. I started to taper down immediatly to 75mg every 3 days which was tough, and dropped down Vicodine taking only 3 times a day from 3 at a time 5 times a day for about a month, then dropped to 50mgs in about 3 weeks, until I got to 25mg patches in another 3 weeks and couldn't do the taper anymore and stopped all meds.
Yes I was EXTREMLY sick in the first weeks, flu symptoms, anxiety, no sleep for days, rapid weight loss, hot/cold sweats, tremoring shakes, and leg cramps. None of which killed me ! It took about 9 weeks off of everything that things started to turn for the better, but I had to work at it. I needed to force myself to eat, and drink lots of water, walk, even around the house until soon I was outside, then around the neighborhood. Lots of baths, slept when able. And as soon as I could went to 12 step meeting daily, even while still detoxing. I can't stress how helpful they were to become in my recovery. 7 months later, I have no symtoms of detox issues, which for awhile had issues of regulating my body temp, all of which was tested and all results fine, and my pain levels intrestingly are virtually gone. Not to say I don't have my days, but with alternative pain management such as PT I did breifly, acupunture which I do once a week and just walking there is no need for narcotic pain relief. Nor to I have to take sleep meds or anxiety meds which I had been on for years. My life is mine again. I no longer live in the insane cycle of opiate addiction, nor live in " acute pain " like I thought I did every time I craved more opiates which only masked the reality of just needing to change my life style. Which since I stopped have not had one craving.
So if you're ready to stop this, I assure you it's worth the discomfort in the beginning. Be gentle with yourself. Have a plan to set some time to yourself in the first weeks to walk thru the physical stuff, retrain your mind when the cravings come if they do by just by doing something else like eating, sleeping if able, or go walk. Or call someone supportive, It WILL pass. And I strongly suggest either AA meetings which are more avalible in certain areas, where there are many recovering addicts in the meetings. Or attend NA meetings. Just having the daily support of others, and making connections with people who don't use was huge in staying on my journey. Take it slow, don't use, go to meetings, the rest will fall into place. One day at a time, make a choice to be part of your own life again. Last year I never thought I would be clean. And 7 months ago, alone I would not have been able to be ! Many thanks to those who guided me in those early days here. And if you're just starting everyday it will get better. I promise !
Sorry for the long post. Just wanted to share that recovery is possible ...