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1176246 tn?1415011917

Recovery=Freedom



I was once on 40mg of hydrocone a day. Then, methadone, starting at 20mg and with the help of a wonderful legit Dr. I found myself walking out the pharmacy with a prescription for 110mg a day. what a country. The biggest drug dealer wears a stethoscope and the biggest distributor has "every day low prices".

Anyway, my chronic knee pain got me a lot of legal medication. Methadone, Hydrocodone, Valium, Klonopin, Soma...and a few others.

I thought I had it made and in no way was my life managable. I became fully addicted and it sucked. Withdrawing from methadone was the worst experience of my life and I wish it upon no one. Especially those that are at this forum. I was prescribed 110mg however ended up taking 270mg before my script ran short.

I decided to write this because there is hope in getting rid of all medications.
I no longer take anything other than what you can find over the counter. And rarely do I find a need for that. Do I still have knee pain? of course. However, its how I deal with it that counts. I haven't seen a Dr. for a prescription in almost a year and my life is really starting to turn for the best. I encourage each and every one of you to do what is in your heart. If it be taper, do so. If it be maintain on your dose and don't climb, do so. Life, however, is much better with none.

If anyone with a big chunk of clean time can help me out that would be great. My question is this....What keeps you from using narcotics and what advise can you give me to never go that route again?

2 Responses
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1123567 tn?1318233260
I have never been to NA or anything but my mindset is different. Here's how my mentality on it all is. I just wanted the phase completely out of my life, I was normal once and can be normal again. It's all the pills telling my head that I need them.

It is really mind over matter.

I started thinking strong once I made my mind believe it was the pills that were why I didn't feel normal and that the only way to be normal, to be happy and to have good memories again were to quit them.

When ever I do crave I just think to myself woahhh, do I really want to start that cycle of hell all over again? It was fun in the beggining but in the end I lost everything, including my sanity and happiness.

Another thing that keeps me going is, how happy I am. I've got my old self back and I am a generally happy person, I even noticed that I created new awesome memories, something that I couldn't do while abusing pills. When I took pills, nothing was fun anymore, I was always depressed and in a blur, and always broke. Everything was a dark room and a long dark road leading to nothing.

That is no way to live. Just try to think positive and push through. When my anxiety kicks in I force myself to get out and do something, usually involving driving and blaring music. I even went and bought a new skateboard and started skating again, I used to be sponsored years ago.
Helpful - 0
199177 tn?1490498534
RECOVERY CARE that is what has made all of the difference in the world to me .I have been clean over two years .It just completely insane that they put you on that much methadone for 40mg of hydro a day the not only methadone but benzos on top ...You are very lucky to still be here with us I am so glad you are it just so scary.Do you got to meetings of any type.how long have you been off all of them?
Helpful - 0
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