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Relapse Help

Ok, I was 14 days clean and feeling great.  A recently x-girlfreind and I decided to meet at lunch time.  An further explaination would be TMI.  We used to enjoy taking hydro together.  When we first met she offered me a 10mg loratab and before I knew it, I was drinking water to wash it down.  Not her falt, completely mine.  

I failed my first trigger!!!!!  I now know that I need an after care program and I will find one!!!

I want to stay clean.  My question is, "Will my withdrawls start all over again?"
Best Answer
480448 tn?1426948538
Thanks everyone and I will follow the link given by IBKleen.  I really thought I did not need aftercare; however, today was a lession.   .

I think a lot of people think that the aftercare speeches are a bunch of hot air.  That really is probably THE most important part of recovery.  There have been countless studies done...the people who do not seek aftercare are the ones who typically fail over and over.

It's very important that you're honest with yourself about how this went down.  Relapse has several stages.  A person actually mentally relapses before they ever get near a drug.  Honestly, if you and this ex did hydro together before...you probably had a good idea she would have some, am I right?  Who initiated the lunch date?  If it was you...I think it's important to recognize that as you drug seeking.  Even if it wasn't fully a conscious effort...there was most likely an ulterior motive there.  Even if you didn't initiate it...you probably were pretty aware of how this could have happened.  Did you have thought processes about it?  Does she know you were clean?  

Eliminating sources is paramount...that includes people if they themselves are a trigger.  This takes work, but it's doable.  I too doubt you'll have any w/d symptoms after one pill...but it needs to stop there.  You need to take the bull by the horns and get serious about wanting to stay clean.  You're on a slippery slope...the next moves you make will determine if you're going to get back on the horse...or continue to try to find ways to use.

Use this experience as a way to learn about yourself, your addiction, and your triggers.  If you can identify and avoid your triggers, you will be on your way back to recovery.  You can do it.

Good luck!
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Avatar universal
Your comments were on point now that I think about it.  I found an after care program a short distance from me and will attend this week end.  Thanks for the straight forward talk.
Helpful - 0
1416133 tn?1351123217
A lot of us think we can do this without aftercare. Those are the addicts that continue to relapse.  Good that you learned from this.
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Thanks everyone and I will follow the link given by IBKleen.  I really thought I did not need aftercare; however, today was a lession.  
Helpful - 0
4204073 tn?1361831476
Crazy how instincts take over and next thing you know it's down our throats without even thinking about it.   That's how deeply engrained our addiction is.  I can't tell you how many times that happened to me.  I would be right where you are and then someone would offer me one and next thing you know I was wanting more and back on that crazy carousel ride again.     If you are going to see her again you must put up safeguards so she doesn't give you more.   And after care will help you with that.    Don't beat yourself up...it's part of the process of learning and growing in recovery.    You shouldn't have any wd symptoms from just one.   But if you did that every day for a few days, you would.   Be careful.  
Helpful - 0
271792 tn?1334979657
You can start here looking for after care.

http://portaltools.na.org/portaltools/MeetingLoc/
Helpful - 0
1508698 tn?1360215710
I'm no expert but if you only took 1 I don't think so.  Just don't take anymore.  It's hard after you take one you want that high again and that is a slippery slope.  The saying "1 is too many and 1,000 is never enough" is so true.  I am glad you caught yourself and know that you can't take anymore. You probably should stay away from your ex-girlfriend and anyone else that you used to get or take pills with.  Also I do encourage you to find after care immediatly.  It will make such a big difference in your recovery. Good Luck!!!
Helpful - 0
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