My heart goes out to you. It totally sucks to live in a prison of our own making. I truly hope by reaching out you have found your "bottom" and can take the steps to create a life of freedom. Trust in the process and know that life can only get better. Your family wants the clean and sober version of you! F!*!* all of the "stuff!" Just like drugs "things" will only yield a temporary high and leave you wanting "more." Please don't give up on recovery! All the best to you
Hi and welcome! Most of us here know exactly what you are feeling. Time to out yourself. Our secrets keep us sick. See your doctor and be completely honest. Get yourself involved in some form of aftercare as your using is only a symptom of what is really going on with you. Surround yourself with supportive people, not ones who use. You speak of your job and your wealth....Enjoy it now as i can guarantee you if you dont stop using you will lose everything. There isnt one of us that is exempt from this. You deserve to be living a good life. You have the key that will unlock those chains that are binding you. Keep us posted on how you are doing.
Hello,
I'm glad you came here and told us all your story. The world of finance IS filled with a lot of drug use; mostly stimulants, in order to keep up with the incredible pace, pressure, and volume of work.
Do I understand you are using 2 grams of coke a day (plus the percs and xanax)? IMO, you're headed for a crash, and it's going to be bad. Besides the fact that cocaine is often called "the perfect heart attack drug" you are an addict. Addiction is a terrible disease that will destroy your life, and the lives of your wife & children.
I'm glad you are seeking a program. You need to do it NOW, as you're playing Russian roulette with your very life. A suggestion: I would start with your physician. Make an appointment, and tell him/her everything. Ask for a referral to a good detox facility, then commit to it an d GO. My guess is you have crossed the line from heavy use into addiction, and this is a lifelong commitment you will make.
Please I beg of you: don't wait until you have lost your wife, your kids, your job, your home. Trust me, that is coming. It's not a case of 'IF' but 'WHEN." In the final analysis, all the money, cars, fancy watches, etc mean nothing if you are dead. I think you are very smart to catch this now, and get the help you so desparately need.
Good luck, and I hope you come back here.
HC
You have all the outside trappings of success, but inside, you are falling apart.