Hi Kristen,
Yes..I do agree that what you do should be your decision. If a person is trying to force you to do what they think is best, they are not honoring and respecting your ability to determine your own life. That is called Control, and it ruins relationships.
Just take deep breaths, and be willing to feel your feelings. We've all used in order to stop the pain of the difficult feelings, but what happens when we do that, is that we only freeze the feelings, we don't get rid of them. So when we go off the drugs, the old feelings melt and are there to be felt, as well as any new feelings that are there. Tell yourself that you can get through the emotional pain. Do what you can to listen to your feelings, and learn the lessons they are trying to offer you. Affirm yourself, and your choices, and get a lot of support. Write, talk, and do whatever else you need to do to process through the emotions, without using.
And you know...this forum is for the entirety of what we go through in our addictions, and that includes exactly what you are talking about!
Remember to congratulate yourself for being drug free..claim your victory and stand your ground.
lots of love,
WW
Well its been 14 days now and I feel pretty good, but I'm going through alot of emotional stuff right now and I need to vent. My dad's in the hospital and my boyfriend and I broke up last night because he INSISTS I get a full time job, probably making less money, than if I was to continue free-lancing and making much more....and I can be home with my kids when they get home from school. He stormed out of my house and told me he wont be with someone who isn't working full time....Shouldn't that be MY decision??? Shouldn't I be doing what makes Kristen happy??? I know this has nothing to do with using....but I'm feeling all this anxiety and abandonment and rejection and sadness and am scared....and when I usually feel all this stuff, i USE but I dont want to go there AGAIN!!!! Maybe someone has some advice....what do you do now that there are no drugs to mask this pain.....HELP HELP HELP!!!!
It's *great* to see you back and I hope you had a wonderful time!
I look forward to catching up with you. I wish I could say I was doing great, but as you'll see from a post above, I hit a bump.
:-(
I'm learning from it though, and trying to figure out if I can handle detoxing yet or not. It scares me so much, I can't find words to describe the fear..even though I know it won't kill me, I guess I'm just a huge pain wimp!
love,
WW
Blessings my friend. I see I have have much to catch up on since I've been gone. I was so glad to see your postings upon my return. Tells me we are still keeping each other "honest". LOL.
The wisdom you bring to the forum is very much appreciated :-)
"Knowledge" and "Truth" will set us free! I will catch up with you later!
Power & Magick 2 U always,
Peace & LIght 2 U 2,
Wiz
Hey all I'm back from Vacation and trying to catch up on everyone.
Kristen, I read a post to me written on the 15th and I was gone till just now so sorry I didn't get to post back to you. It looks like you did get a great group to reply and I see a lot of new detoxers jumping in. Let me tell you and the others that you couldn't have found a better place to come to get the support before, during and after detox. It has been my lifeline for sure. Whenever I feel the need for the "Dragon" I come here to keep myself honest as W.W. says. IT WORKS!
Schlub,GJ,ib welcome and stick around as I think you'll find a turning point for all of you here. Sometimes it comes fast, sometimes slow but it DOES come.
To all my other "angel" friends here hello! I missed you all but never ceased thinking about you and praying for all of us! I'll catch up with you all as I can!
Power & Magick @ U all,
Peace & Light 2 U 2,
Wizard
And the same to you, my friend.
My God, the power we have to help heal each other is a wonder to behold. There is no fate except what we make for ourselves, and here in this forum we are each of us making new healthy lives for ourselves. Bless us all; look at what we are accomplishing!