Aa
Aa
A
A
A
Close
Avatar universal

WAKING up!

Omg, I don't even know how to start this!! As some of you know I'm on day 13 yay me, of cold turkey detox. I was taking 15 20mlg ocycodone, and 10 tramadol a day, I know that ridiculous. I know I write on here a lot about my progress, strengths and feelings. I want to help others succeed as well.  But this one is a must share: I "woke up today", holy ****! I don't know how I can even express what I mean, I know I couldn't remember what it felt like to be "normal", who i used to be, and I knew I wanted to be there, and I never realized exactly what I was missing. Please if you are detoxing, even if you relapsed, please don't give up, don't stop trying, there is NOTHING and I mean NOTHING more worth it, seeing the gleam, cheer and happiness in your children's eyes, or families eyes when they realize their mom, wife, husband, sister, child, whom ever IS BACK! I didn't not realize how far gone I was, how different I was, distant and changed, child almost like your asleep but awake, when I was taking pain meds. Today something changed, something clicked, with that click I blasted our music and have been dancing with my children ALL DAY. Cleaning, cooking doing whatever with them, and being truly WITH them and feeling amazing Happiness. I have never felt happier, more awake, more alive, more with my children in so long. I finally REMEMBER who I was before, what I felt like before. This is glory, heaven. Please guys, all the veterans say, sober is the best, it is true! I'm not back to normal, per say, but I'm close. I seen true awe and glimmer in my children's eyes at my energy and happiness, like they were thinking, "mommy is back!". I will never turn back, please everyone don't give up trying. This is the BEST feeling in the world. Today I got to "wake up" and it is the best feeling in the ever! Thanks to everyone who has guided me, and supported me through this. You all rock!
16 Responses
Sort by: Helpful Oldest Newest
7684852 tn?1437171892
This was SO great to read.......I am over the moon happy for you!  Keeping dancin' there mama!
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Thanks newlife. I proudly didn't describe that well, but I'm not sure it is capable if being describe. I literally feel like I WOKE UP, and ironically I haven't really slept in weeks. Lol
Helpful - 0
7684852 tn?1437171892
You are doing great!  I hear you with the sleep...I've got over 9 months and sleep is a big problem but I got off a 20 years on opiates and am tapering off Xanax too.

I am still in the dark and gloomy depressed state but am holding out to wake up one day to experience what you described.  So do me a favor.....dance one out with your kids for me ok......and no matter how I feel tomorrow I will force myself to do the same!

Keep up that great attitude...you wear it oh so well!
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Newlife, your comment made me cry, in a good way. Thank you. I know im still extremely exhausted and fatigued throughout the day. I found that exercising forcing myself to physically function helps snap me out of it, then I feel great. I have to do this everyday, and I'm excited for the day to come that I don't have to work so hard, but it is so worth. We will dance "together" tomorrow.
Helpful - 0
11318065 tn?1462984479
WOW!  What a great post!!!  So glad that you are feeling so well and that you are getting back to your old self!!!  Im sure that dancing with the kids was awesome!!!  Keep on doing such a great job!!!  XO  Karen
Helpful - 0
6668556 tn?1422469105
Thats is so great and so inspirational to me you go girl!!! Cant wait to feel that!! To feel alive again and not controlled by a drug that does nothing but hurt you in the long run!! Good for you! Your not scaredmamma no more your fearless mamma now go get em!!
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
That is AWESOME and BEAUTIFUL!  As I lay awake another night, that really gave me the boost I needed to get through the day. Sooo happy for you!
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
This was really great to read!! So happy for you,and to feel this at only 13 days!! Well that's just amazing!! :D I was on half the oxy as you and didn't start feeling any better until a month.Yay you!!! You go girl!!
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Thanks everyone, believe me it is not without effort, I have to make myself every morning move and get a kick start. I keep a great attitude. Then it kicks in, comes and goes in waves. I can't wait until I just feel like that on my own. But either way, weather I have to try or not, it is worth it and amazing.
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Day 14, whoop whoop
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Wooooo!!!!!  You go, Mama!!!!
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
I am new to this site and I'm on day 4 of oxy-hell withdrawl. I am a mother too. Your post brought tears to my eyes. I have been dreaming of getting back to "normal" for years now. To be able to get moving without pills. To have energy and calm without being high. I want this so bad! You've given me hope that it can happen! Thank you for that! I'm so glad that you're finding yourself again. I hope I can too.
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Hey Girl  where you been we havent seen you for a couple of days  you oK??? Your one of the lucky ones you got the ''pink cloud'' effect coming off  I never got it once with countless detoxes I hope it lasts but dont be suprized if you have some bad days here and there  please post to let us know your ok..............Gnarly
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
I felt the same coming out of my withdrawal! I realized I was laughing, smiling and cracking jokes more. Almost like a fog lifted and I could see, smell, hear and FEEL for the first time in years! Hold onto that feeling and build on it....it's a feeling a pill could never give us.
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Hey guys. I'm doing great, I have been out of town for a couple days. I'm on day 17 yay me! I'm still fighting some physical symptoms but I'm handling them well. Every day I struggle for energy but I make it come and I love it. I love the emotional roller coaster and seeing clearly. It is amazing. Thank you everyone so much for your support.
Helpful - 0
11532111 tn?1421549858
Glad to see you doing Great cant wait to do the same
Helpful - 0
Have an Answer?

You are reading content posted in the Addiction: Substance Abuse Community

Top Addiction Answerers
495284 tn?1333894042
City of Dominatrix, MN
Avatar universal
phoenix, AZ
Learn About Top Answerers
Didn't find the answer you were looking for?
Ask a question
Popular Resources
Is treating glaucoma with marijuana all hype, or can hemp actually help?
If you think marijuana has no ill effects on your health, this article from Missouri Medicine may make you think again.
Julia Aharonov, DO, reveals the quickest way to beat drug withdrawal.
Tricks to help you quit for good.
Herpes sores blister, then burst, scab and heal.
Herpes spreads by oral, vaginal and anal sex.