Love that post! I look forward to following your recovery!
Me and weaver have had an amazing conversation and I am on my way to recovery. I will start a journal and start posting my progress and movements on this road to sobriety.
Just jumping in to offer my support. You are in really good hands and have been given amazing advice. Please take the direction you have been given and put it into action. You can beat this addiction..you have an entire lifetime ahead of you! God bless!
Now I definitely recommend CBT, at least read, "Feeling Good," by David D. Burns and get familiar with redirecting your thoughts. I waited too long to get help with my dual diagnosis, but I think I'm well today. I went to 120 12 step meetings in 120 days, a posted here daily, enough time has to pass to make new memories to define our new selfs by. It took me 2 1/2 years to finally quit, but that last time is goin on 2 years now. I think reaching out in all directions was the key for me. I confided in my banker for God's sake. If I relapsed, I lost everything. I set myself up for total success or else I had to walk away with a backpack. I had to make it so my life depended on it, I'm stubborn like that, getting better about that though. Keep knocking and doors will open.
one is too many and 1000 isnt enough personally speaking thats how it was for me as well.............i was always jealous of ppl knoddin out it rarely happend late in my addiction!!!! i think subs are good for short short term use like week to cpl weeks but thats bout it ......everyone is different ill say that!!! you in good hand with weaver thats for sure!!! CONGRATS on wanting 2 get your life back anon!!! keep posting keep fighting
Well I never really got to a point with the methadone where I felt good enough. In the beginning they started me off on 30 mgs and it was actually getting me high and I felt great. After a while it was like i hadn't taken anything, even after getting up to 60mg. The suboxone was the exact same. I felt tired with both, nodding and stuff but no other effects than that. As far as the drugs I never had enough to feel good enough. The more the better I felt. But it was never good enough. I post a thread in the doctor forum you might be interested in reading and might give you some more insight to my problem. But I need to eventually get off all of it because I cant afford it. I just cant. No one in my family has the money to pay for it either or they would. Its unfortunate but I ave to get off soon. But I also kind of feel its a crutch that I shouldn't need.
http://www.medhelp.org/posts/Addiction/Opiate-Addiction/show/2152878
I like CBT, Cognative Behavioral Therapy. At 200-300mcgs of Fentanyl to 60 mgs of methadone, I can feel your anxiety and confusion. I chose Subutex to get me off a 200-250mg methadone habit, I used Subutex to detox, should have taken it longer. I was scared to get hooked on subs. So, my question is, how much of what do you have to take a day to feel good enough?
Is there is any tools or anything you can think of I will do it. Weaver71 you seem experienced enough to teach me what I need to do. I desperately need help. But I need it in steps. Like how many clonazepam should I take. Etc etc.
What should I be using and how much to help negate some of the negative feelings? Note in my original post what I have access to. I have a decent tolerance to benzos by the way.
I have removed myself from all drug using friends and places. I am trying to get a job and such. Basic life things. I am only 19 but I have been an addict for almost 5 years now. Heavy use for around 3. I am just struggling to find the exact steps I need to get to where I want to be which is a stable sober life. Its hard for me to just talk about myself, I am so happy you are willing to help. Ask me anything you'd like.
200-300mcgs of Fentanyl is a pretty heafty habit. Have you changed your friends and playgrounds while on methadone? What is your aftercare plan, when there are no drugs in your body at all? Do you feel you need more time to get your life together? Tell us about yourself, so we can try and help more.
Thanks gnarly. I just relapsed unfortunately. Its kind of a coincidence since I just posted this. I have to get myself under control. I only had 3 lortabs though. Nothing like my ordinary. Just something to take the edge off. I am not making excuses though. I feel bad of course.
HI well it all boils down to how much discomfort you can tolerate the clinic will have guidelines that keeps them from getting sued they would rather error on the side of to little then to much with methadone the slower the better but let it be know we have had members jump off as high as 110mg and make it I did a slow taper off a 7yr habit at 150mg it took me 8 1/2 months and I was uncomfortable a lot of the time your lucky you have not been on it that long you just might want to try just jumping off you can always go back just know this I tapered all the way down and still went threw some powerful withdrawals so there is no ''get out of jail free card'' it is all up to you keep posting for support we all want to see you get well. ...........................Gnarly...............................
Before methadone I was doing 4-6 50mcg fentanyl patches a day. Heavy opiate use. I do have a very high relapse history as well.
Hi there, ok, well for starters let me say congrats to you for starting to reclaim your life. Remember, we didn't become addicts over night, so this takes time, i know as addicts we tend to not have patience but slow and steady wins the race. We cant give specific tapering advice, but for sure you are dropping too fast. So the fastest way is to cold turkey it, but thats a high dose but doable, if you are one that can taper and have help that would be great too, either way i hope you want this for yourself and not for financial reasons.
You have not been on methadone very long, what and how much were you doing before methadone? I found when I first started, that I could take 20mgs for a week and get used to it. Below 20 was a different story, but it's doable. You shouldn't have the kind of withdrawal I had from methadone, after many years and reaching high doses. If you get down now, most of it is still mental at this point. The withdrawal shouldn't be too bad, the anxiety, regret, resentments, doubt, fear, and all that other stuff that arises in recovery are also another story.
I'd avoid the subs unless you have a history of relapse or high dose history of stronger opiates. I used them, but rarely suggest buprenorphine. If you give a little more history and what kind of aftercare you are in, we could hopefully help you more.
As a methadone veteran, I feel qualified to say avoid it if you can.
Someone please help! I am desperate.
I also have the option of getting suboxone from my clinic daily. This can only be temporary because it is 6$ more a day I believe.
I just wanted to note that I currently don't have reliable transportation and it is taking a lot of my funds to do this treatment. It has been helpful and I think I am ready to do this on my own.