Aa
When will it get better?
I took my last Lortab 10mg on Monday morning at 9am. Tuesday I was a little anxious and had tummy trouble but nothing major. Wednesday was the WORST... my sinuses were awful, I was nauseous, jittery etc... Today is Sunday and I think I'm finally getting over the anxiety but my stomache is worse, if you can believe it? When does physical withdraw end?
A little backstory...
I'm a 41 year old married mother of 3.
I started taking 10mg Percocet x 4 a day in Sept 2008, just because I like the way it felt. I would take them from my mother who gets a monthly prescription. I continued that for about a year and was then introduced to the Roxy 30's. OMG did I LOVE those. At first, I did about 2 a day (1/2 at a time). By mid 2010 I was up to 4 a day, buying them from a neighbor. I even started snorting them. My neighbor was no longer an option in Dec 2010 so I was pretty much off them cold turkey BUT was able to rob my mom's bottle of Lortab. Her pain doc put her down on tabs as they were managing her pain. So, I was taking those from her and using 4-6 a day. I think it helped me to get off the Roxy's. Last week I took about 4 tabs a day and then Monday took my last one at 9am. I am so tired of the hold the pills had on my life. I would take them as soon as I woke up just to energize and start the day. I recognize some folks were/are taking a much higher dosage but man, the withdraws are really awful. I didn't sleep but 2 hours last night AFTER taking an Ambien. WTH? My right leg is in so much pain, near the hip and it's never hurt in my life. The tops of my feet hurt too. Is this part of withdraw?
Anyway, I've been trying to read up on posts here but the links that google sent me to were from several years ago. I would like to know I'm not alone in real time. Thank you in advance for your suggestions.
Oh, I am supplementing with a B Complex each day, Ibuprofen, and I may add Potassium supplement today.
A little backstory...
I'm a 41 year old married mother of 3.
I started taking 10mg Percocet x 4 a day in Sept 2008, just because I like the way it felt. I would take them from my mother who gets a monthly prescription. I continued that for about a year and was then introduced to the Roxy 30's. OMG did I LOVE those. At first, I did about 2 a day (1/2 at a time). By mid 2010 I was up to 4 a day, buying them from a neighbor. I even started snorting them. My neighbor was no longer an option in Dec 2010 so I was pretty much off them cold turkey BUT was able to rob my mom's bottle of Lortab. Her pain doc put her down on tabs as they were managing her pain. So, I was taking those from her and using 4-6 a day. I think it helped me to get off the Roxy's. Last week I took about 4 tabs a day and then Monday took my last one at 9am. I am so tired of the hold the pills had on my life. I would take them as soon as I woke up just to energize and start the day. I recognize some folks were/are taking a much higher dosage but man, the withdraws are really awful. I didn't sleep but 2 hours last night AFTER taking an Ambien. WTH? My right leg is in so much pain, near the hip and it's never hurt in my life. The tops of my feet hurt too. Is this part of withdraw?
Anyway, I've been trying to read up on posts here but the links that google sent me to were from several years ago. I would like to know I'm not alone in real time. Thank you in advance for your suggestions.
Oh, I am supplementing with a B Complex each day, Ibuprofen, and I may add Potassium supplement today.
Hi again - first, you don't sound selfish; I think it makes a huge difference knowing someone else is experiencing what you are. It's also a great motivator to hear from people who've made it - I hope WHEN I eventually beat this, I am able to come back here and be of some help to somebody. I think it must be awfully hard to step back into this subject once you've gotten out tho.
That said, I am SO SORRY to hear about your friend of the family! It does put some perspective on our problems... I also agree that sometimes the pure SHOCK of a heart-breaking event can get your adrenaline to kick in and help you fight.
While I am very sorry to hear about someone going so young, with a child especially, it's good to hear the 'fight' in your voice. I've lost that. I can't seem to get that 'I won't let this beat me' thing going. Mostly I'm just afraid it's going to kick my a** again.
Obviously, I didn't quit when I posted, BUT, I did make an appointment with a doctor for suboxone. I'm scared and embarrassed and feel utterly ashamed, but I will go. I hope I'm one of the ones that it works for. It's THIS FRIDAY. I'm already thinking WTH did I make it so SOON for?? And then I remember the misery I've put myself and everyone around me through... How can you hate a thing and still be so desperately afraid of losing it at the same time?? It's like being in love with a man who beats the h**l out of you every night.
You have my sincere congrats for making it another day, and my sincere sympathy goes out to your friend and his poor family - particularly his mother. Thank God, children can adapt and survive trauma better than we adults do. I think it's partly because they don't really understand the permanence of death, but I also ( this is going to sound crazy) think that children are somehow more in tune(?) with "God" (regardless of any religion). They have such genuine, instinctive faith that there is something positive "up there" looking out for them and whoever has passed. His mother, on the other hand... I can't imagine anything more devastating than your child going before you.
I can't believe I wrote so much again... Insomnia and iPads don't mix! I have to start limiting myself to two paragraphs. Oh well, too late now; I don't feel like scrolling back to decide what to delete ;)
Anyway, hang in there, you are doing so great! Please, PLEASE let me have your willpower come Friday. I'm already scared. And keep posting!
I'm praying for you (and your friends family tonight)
That said, I am SO SORRY to hear about your friend of the family! It does put some perspective on our problems... I also agree that sometimes the pure SHOCK of a heart-breaking event can get your adrenaline to kick in and help you fight.
While I am very sorry to hear about someone going so young, with a child especially, it's good to hear the 'fight' in your voice. I've lost that. I can't seem to get that 'I won't let this beat me' thing going. Mostly I'm just afraid it's going to kick my a** again.
Obviously, I didn't quit when I posted, BUT, I did make an appointment with a doctor for suboxone. I'm scared and embarrassed and feel utterly ashamed, but I will go. I hope I'm one of the ones that it works for. It's THIS FRIDAY. I'm already thinking WTH did I make it so SOON for?? And then I remember the misery I've put myself and everyone around me through... How can you hate a thing and still be so desperately afraid of losing it at the same time?? It's like being in love with a man who beats the h**l out of you every night.
You have my sincere congrats for making it another day, and my sincere sympathy goes out to your friend and his poor family - particularly his mother. Thank God, children can adapt and survive trauma better than we adults do. I think it's partly because they don't really understand the permanence of death, but I also ( this is going to sound crazy) think that children are somehow more in tune(?) with "God" (regardless of any religion). They have such genuine, instinctive faith that there is something positive "up there" looking out for them and whoever has passed. His mother, on the other hand... I can't imagine anything more devastating than your child going before you.
I can't believe I wrote so much again... Insomnia and iPads don't mix! I have to start limiting myself to two paragraphs. Oh well, too late now; I don't feel like scrolling back to decide what to delete ;)
Anyway, hang in there, you are doing so great! Please, PLEASE let me have your willpower come Friday. I'm already scared. And keep posting!
I'm praying for you (and your friends family tonight)
I'm sure your mom already knows, that's alot of pills to be missing from the bottle everytime you came over for a visit. She is probably just doesn't know how to address it with you. When we are in active addiction, we think that no one is aware, that never seems to be the case though.
Good Luck and great job on the 7 days!
Good Luck and great job on the 7 days!
Just a quick note a potassium supplment is not a good idea, potassium is a important part on your heart and controls how it receive signals, if u over due a supplment of potassium ur heart could misfire, bannans wont give u enough potassium to cause a problem put a additional supplment could, if your having a problem with RLS I would personally try something more natural like warm tea or milk at night to relax, i have never been big on supplments bought from health foods stores as there not montiored by the FDA.
Thank you Ginger, and while I wouldn't wish this on ANYONE I take comfort knowing I'm not alone. I hope you don't think me selfish for that thought.
I wanted to point out, on top of the 7 days clean, my family is going thru an awful ordeal. My husbands best friend, and best man at our wedding, was struck by a hit and run driver on Jan 14. He suffered such severe brain trauma that he is not going to wake up. The 2nd opinion is coming today but the determination is that his brain is dead. His mother will be removing the ventilator on Wednesday. This is such devastating news. He has a young son who will never have a tangible memory of his father. Perhaps the emotional anguish of the situation has actually helped me to get thru the physical withdraw. It is just awful! It's also help me put things into perspective to stay the course. I mean, life is so precious. Family is so precious. Addiction will NOT beat me! I will beat this and be a better person for it.
I will pray for all of you. We are in this together.
I wanted to point out, on top of the 7 days clean, my family is going thru an awful ordeal. My husbands best friend, and best man at our wedding, was struck by a hit and run driver on Jan 14. He suffered such severe brain trauma that he is not going to wake up. The 2nd opinion is coming today but the determination is that his brain is dead. His mother will be removing the ventilator on Wednesday. This is such devastating news. He has a young son who will never have a tangible memory of his father. Perhaps the emotional anguish of the situation has actually helped me to get thru the physical withdraw. It is just awful! It's also help me put things into perspective to stay the course. I mean, life is so precious. Family is so precious. Addiction will NOT beat me! I will beat this and be a better person for it.
I will pray for all of you. We are in this together.
Oops, wanted to clear up the immodium thing - I have been trying to kick this for over a year. This will be, I'm ashamed to admit, my 5th go around. I used the immod ium on my last unsuccessful go at it. I also had a lot of bizarre aches and pains in weird places, including a sky high fever (104), horribly swollen glands, and a lump in my breast that was the size of an egg and appeared over night. The fever was a separate incident from the freaky gland lump thing.
I think it just wreaks havoc on your body for awhile, including throwing your immune system out of whack, which can lead to all sorts of symptoms. My understanding is that the worst is over at your stage, but it takes a good six months for your body to regain it's full balance. Hopefully that's bs and it's a lot faster.
Good luck and great job :)
I think it just wreaks havoc on your body for awhile, including throwing your immune system out of whack, which can lead to all sorts of symptoms. My understanding is that the worst is over at your stage, but it takes a good six months for your body to regain it's full balance. Hopefully that's bs and it's a lot faster.
Good luck and great job :)
Hi - count me in for same story as well! I'm 40, and would be an Eagles mom, not the Redskins, but otherwise I could have written your post - well, that and I took my *last* an hour ago... Maybe it's too soon to say that. We'll see. I'm gonna give it another shot tho.
I just wanted to add two things:
Dav125 is right about the immodium. I never got it before, but it absolutely positively helps with more than just it's obvious purpose. I think I read somewhere that it acts on the same receptors? All I know is that it made an enormous difference to me.
Second, and MOST IMPORTANTLY, there will be time to consider whether or not to tell your mom in a few weeks - months. Do NOT stress yourself right now! You're a mother; treat yourself the way you would care for one of your children if they were ill. What you are doing is tremendously important, and you deserve a tremendous amount of credit for making it this far. I truly, truly hope you'll make it - I'll pray for you if you'll pray for me lol. I need ALL the help I can get, because I've only made it past day 4 once.
Also, the only point I see in telling your mother is if it will make it harder for you to get them from her in the future. If it won't, when it is time to consider what you should do, ask yourself honestly if she would be grateful or hurt by the revelation. I don't agree with confessing everything you've done while addicted - sometimes, the result is more hurtful than helpful. It depends on your mother. (mine would feel very hurt and betrayed. I think I can honestly say she would not want to know. She wouldn't want me to do it again, but if that wasn't an issue, no way would she want to hear it).
You can make amends of a sort regardless of whether or not you tell her. (later, that is, after YOU are taken care of). I'm sure there are a million things she'd love you to do for her.
Btw, when I said my mother would feel betrayed, I wasn't judging you - I did the same thing twice awhile back, and I still feel terrible about it.
Best of luck to you - stranger or not, I WILL pray for you. I think everyone going through this needs every ounce of support they can get (I know I do; I'm so AFRAID) and it's a nice thought to know that somewhere someone going through the same thing is rooting for you.
Take care AND GOOD JOB!!!!!
I just wanted to add two things:
Dav125 is right about the immodium. I never got it before, but it absolutely positively helps with more than just it's obvious purpose. I think I read somewhere that it acts on the same receptors? All I know is that it made an enormous difference to me.
Second, and MOST IMPORTANTLY, there will be time to consider whether or not to tell your mom in a few weeks - months. Do NOT stress yourself right now! You're a mother; treat yourself the way you would care for one of your children if they were ill. What you are doing is tremendously important, and you deserve a tremendous amount of credit for making it this far. I truly, truly hope you'll make it - I'll pray for you if you'll pray for me lol. I need ALL the help I can get, because I've only made it past day 4 once.
Also, the only point I see in telling your mother is if it will make it harder for you to get them from her in the future. If it won't, when it is time to consider what you should do, ask yourself honestly if she would be grateful or hurt by the revelation. I don't agree with confessing everything you've done while addicted - sometimes, the result is more hurtful than helpful. It depends on your mother. (mine would feel very hurt and betrayed. I think I can honestly say she would not want to know. She wouldn't want me to do it again, but if that wasn't an issue, no way would she want to hear it).
You can make amends of a sort regardless of whether or not you tell her. (later, that is, after YOU are taken care of). I'm sure there are a million things she'd love you to do for her.
Btw, when I said my mother would feel betrayed, I wasn't judging you - I did the same thing twice awhile back, and I still feel terrible about it.
Best of luck to you - stranger or not, I WILL pray for you. I think everyone going through this needs every ounce of support they can get (I know I do; I'm so AFRAID) and it's a nice thought to know that somewhere someone going through the same thing is rooting for you.
Take care AND GOOD JOB!!!!!
Thank you both for your replies. I guess today is day 7? It was a week ago right about now that I took my last one. I actually slept 5 hours in a row last night and had only used melatonin as an aid, not to mention riding high (naturally) after an awesome Super Bowl. I feel a little tired this morning but that's about it. Although, I do have a nasty cough (not w/d related) so that is making my chest hurt. I think what is helping is that I feel so good about my decision to kick this nasty addiction that it is helping me fight thru the other stuff. Also, for symptom watchers, my tummy is better today! Phew... that was rough, lol.
Another thing... part of me feels I should come clean to my mom about all of this but I really can't do that. I know that doing it will make it that much easier to stay off them because she will be much more guarded with her supply during my visits to her house. But let's be honest, an addict will find a way to get them, right? I am just so embarassed that I let this happen. Addiction has many faces and it's not just the ones that fit the mold. If you were to meet me you would NEVER think I had become the closet addict.
Ok, done rambling. Thanks again and I'm going to read that link Dav125, thank you.
Another thing... part of me feels I should come clean to my mom about all of this but I really can't do that. I know that doing it will make it that much easier to stay off them because she will be much more guarded with her supply during my visits to her house. But let's be honest, an addict will find a way to get them, right? I am just so embarassed that I let this happen. Addiction has many faces and it's not just the ones that fit the mold. If you were to meet me you would NEVER think I had become the closet addict.
Ok, done rambling. Thanks again and I'm going to read that link Dav125, thank you.
Swiching to the lortab definitely helped you with the roxy wd's. If today is your 6th day away from the lortabs, your about over any major physical wd's you would have had. Get some immodium for the stomach problems though. It works wonders..
.If you look up deperately's recent post (the girl above), I gave a fairly complete description of what to expect with the wd's and how they will still be lingering for another week or 10 days bugging you
The worse of the physicaL you should be about done with. Now the mental part begins with a few ligering physical symptoms that will be with yo for awhile longer..Check out her post though..This is it below. I listed some of the lingering stuff you can expect: Dav
http://www.medhelp.org/posts/Addiction-Substance-Abuse/Does-this-ever-get-better-/show/1454333
.If you look up deperately's recent post (the girl above), I gave a fairly complete description of what to expect with the wd's and how they will still be lingering for another week or 10 days bugging you
The worse of the physicaL you should be about done with. Now the mental part begins with a few ligering physical symptoms that will be with yo for awhile longer..Check out her post though..This is it below. I listed some of the lingering stuff you can expect: Dav
http://www.medhelp.org/posts/Addiction-Substance-Abuse/Does-this-ever-get-better-/show/1454333
Wow! We have a lot in common. Same age. I'm on day 5 today. Lortab 10's are my drug of choice. AND I also have been stealing them from my mom for a LONG time. I'm right there with you on the withdrawals too. They definitely suck!
People on here have been very supportive so stick around.
I think it's going to be very important for both of us to make a plan about how to deal with being around our mothers and not use. I actually live with my mom to help take care of her after she suffered a stroke a year ago. She has been out of town the past few days but will be home today and I am really nervous about that.
I really want to stay off these things now. I know that we can both do this! Just know that you aren't alone.
People on here have been very supportive so stick around.
I think it's going to be very important for both of us to make a plan about how to deal with being around our mothers and not use. I actually live with my mom to help take care of her after she suffered a stroke a year ago. She has been out of town the past few days but will be home today and I am really nervous about that.
I really want to stay off these things now. I know that we can both do this! Just know that you aren't alone.
Oh, I suppose I should add... yesterday, I guess that's day 5? I had BAD cravings to where, If I could have gotten them, I would have taken them. It was the worst. I hadn't craved since stopping. Today, craving under control.
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