Why do the people closest to me still think that I am still getting high after I went to rehab and have been clean over 1 1/2 mos?

[FreshOutOfRehab]

This topic may hit home with a few people. It has really been bothering me! It is almost making me stronger yet I am wanting to relaps. I was accused of getting high my first day back from rehab by my ex, and now by my father - twice! Yet theses are the people who enabled me - giving me money to support my wild/expensive heroin and cocaine bindge addiction. They know my patterns of missing and being out to "party" for days/weeks/months - turn off my phone, call only for money, and voice that I was not ready to quit! What the ****? I have been around every day! I went out two nights to drink with normal people and had a blast! They are friends that don't do the ****. I have missed out on a lot of normal fun due to the fact that I was 15 when I started to use, now that I am 26 - I want to catch up on some of that! Any suggestion?

[perkedup4lyfe]

O.K. Let me just say this I got high with my sister for around 2 or 3 years not to mention she is the one that introduced it to me no not her fault I was grown an made the mistake anyhow I have been clean 2 years in may an she still runs around tellin people I am back on drugs only because she still gets high on one thing or another I dont know your situation but I do know with her she talks s**t because it makes her feel better bout herself an she hates that I am doin good she feels if everyone thinks I am doin bad they wont worry bout her so much but your situation may be different it took almost a year for my mom to trust me agin I mean I did do alot of things I am not proud of to include stealing from her but now she trust me with the key to her home and her buissness so be patent it will happen its easy to loose trust and hard to get back good luck dont get discouraged!!~~

[Htownnofrown]

My suggestion would be to find some other kind of fun that doesn't involve drinking. As I would think hey told you in rehab, using any mind altering substance is a bad thin for addicts. Not only is there a possibility of cross addiction but also it is much easier to go back to the DOC when there are already other drugs in the body. Its a recipe for disaster. Also you said you were using since you were 15.. Do you really think a long and a half (mind you they still see you goin out drinking) is long enough to have their trust? Seems like you may need to be a little more open minded with them.

[gizzy32]

I believe trust is earned. It is going to take them some time before they trust you again, but they will as long as your staying clean and serious about it. Cocaine is my DOC also and I can't imagine going out drinking with friends without having serious cravings for coke or other drugs. For me, that is a disaster waiting to happen.

I am glad to hear you went to rehab, was it your choice? Have you followed it up with any type of aftercare? You said your wanting to relapse, now is the time to get all the support you can. Stay strong and congrats on getting off the herion/coke:)

[IBKleen]

Like everyone has mentioned, trust is something that is earned and you have to be patient with them until they feel comfortable.

Now, that being said, I am going to give a little tough love here.

First, there is no such thing as catching up on the years that you lost. They are gone. What you can do is learn from them.

Not to take sides here but when they see you out partying and drinking, what do you think is going through their minds? I would suspect that they are thinking you are still partying and still running around having a good time. They do not see you working on your recovery and doing anything to change your behavior. Whether it is alcohol, heroin or cocaine--the behavior is still the same in their eyes.

You are still looking for that "feel good" everywhere but within yourself. I fear it will catch up with you and those "normal" friends you are having fun with now will quickly turn back into those old drug friends.

I would like to think that the treatment center set you up in an aftercare program before releasing you but apparently that is not the case, or you chose not to participate. I wish that were not the case.

I hope this all works out for you and you can begin your recovery and get on with a happy life. Whatever you chose to do, be good to yourself.

[shiningstar500]

Congrats on your clean time! That is great!!! Trust is probably the reason why they are accusing you of using drugs. It should pass with time and showing that you are clean!!!

[dominosarah]

It takes a long time for others to fully trust us again.  We gave them many a reason not too.  What matters now is what you know...that you are clean.  Our actions will speak louder than words. I do want to throw out a caution here with the drinking.  It is very common to switch addictions so please be very careful with this.  Drinking will take you down real fast......sara

[Tab57]

The problem is that you have a seroius credibility issues with those who love you the most as these are undoubtedly the peole who you lied to and took advantage of during the time your were doing drugs. I can speak to this as I have been "victimized" a few times and am working through two folks who are in your suiuation rgiht now.

It will take a while to rebuild the trust and your actuions will speak louder than your words. You need to walk the walk. Something else that would really help you is for you to talk to these people one on one and admit what you did to harm them and sincerely aplologize to them. After doing thes etwo things next you should tell them about your plans to insure that this will never happen again. Hopefully you ahver already done these three things but if not you need to as soon as possible.

I can't blame peole for being skeptical based on your track record. However there is a difference between being skeptical and being accusatory. Being accusatory crosses the line. People have a right to be skeptical but they don't have the right to accuse you of doing drugs again unless they have seen you do so or you repeat any of your behavior that you exhibited when you were using drugs. If you do either then people are free to say what they please.

Congratualtins of getting sober and please continue posting.