addict not feeling normal

Question

hey everyone,
its been awhile hope all is well.
here I am at a cross roads and need some advice/help. since I started my recovery from 2012- current I started with detox, suboxone,subutex (pregnant) & now methadone. I want to say that I am thankful that I have a good support system and I am clean & have all my takehomes,etc. my struggle is with energy & my mood somwhat idk if I should use that word. I have no energy,happiness,spirit,nontalkative, im actually kind of alone. although I know ill never get to be like how I was on drugs I do believe I should feel better than this. ive triedvitamins, workingout, supplements,otc medications, notropics, etc. I don't know what to do at this point, ive even researched symptoms of addhd and other conditions. if anyone can post on how to feel better more energetic, more at task, happy,etc id appreciate it. I would like to say that I am open to hearing positive things & sorry for the misspellings and run on sentences. lol

10356 · Answer

Thank you Mark..

gnarly_1 · Answer

Hi.....well 10% every 2 weeks is a good plan...I wish more clinics would do it this way....just know you can get your life back.... for starters get up to wallmart and pick up a 3 in 1 vitamin calcium/magnesium/zinc....take 4 with breakfast and 4 with dinner....methadone robs your body of these minerals and makes the withdrawal a lot worst....it take a few days for this to help I only wish I had found it sooner....tapering takes perseverance and resolve to stick with it....wile tapering you will go in and out of withdrawals some doses are ez others are harder you just have to stick with it dont yo/yo your dose up and down...there is no completely comfortable way to do this but the withdrawals can be managed the lower your dose the harder it gets...I went into hard withdrawals at 40mg and 20 took me 6 weeks to get past it let your body be the judge in when you lower your dose if your in withdrawal dont lower it it will only get worst you just got to ride it out until your body adjusts just know this it is so so worth it we can support you along the way so keep posting......Gnarly

Stungbythebee · Answer

Hey newmom. I'm 2 weeks today off oxy. Still finding my way. I suggest going to the top of the page in the search box type in jimmym321. It's a long read but worth the time. An amazing journey of hope. I will pray for you and send good thoughts your way. 
BEE

newmommy1217 · Answer

aw thanks guys. it's nice to know people out there are willing to help me with advice. i at times feel like i have no one to turn to talk about these things. anyways, yes we have counseling every month twice a month. i used to go to my own private counseling too but stopped due to the fact i had a hard time with babysitting. but now that it's been a little bit of time, im willing to go to counseling again. i never put down therapy, ive been through it all my life so i always count that into consideration. i also have been thinking about lowering my dose too. i just dont see how thatll help. can someone tell me how that itll help? is it like overtime ill notice a difference or right away? 

obviously i know that im not 100% clean and sober. im in a maintenance program. but i guess i feel at times im somewhat clean because i dont use drugs and abuse them.i think thats commendable. i know that its gonna be really hard to quit everything. i guess im just thinking about one thing at a time. that's all anyone can really do. ultimately, id like to be off everything and be healthy, so i can really know what im like. but until then, i guess my plan is to wean myself down, 10% bi-weekly. i know when i was on suboxone i had weaned myself down to i think 4 mg a day. so i have been on a tapering program before. it does take a lot of work and to be honest i am scared.

10356 · Answer

Hi Newmommy. You are on a high dose This may be why you are so depressed ! I agree with you they should have counseling at clinics but where is the money in that ? Reducing 10mg every 2 weeks at that dose You would not feel the wd right away, not till you got down lower.. I believe lowering your dose would be a great benefit to you.. Also it would not hurt to check out meetings maybe our even sign up for mental health with the city our town you are in, Most have it free our on a sliding scale There may be a waiting list but it would be worth it to get your name on it. Anyway I wanted you to know I was thinking of you. I hope you make the decision to lower your dose to see if it helps..

jifmoc · Answer

Newmommy- hi, you've been around a while so I'm sure you know that it's stated over and over that being in recovery is different than just being off drugs. And, honestly, you aren't clean. You, on methadone isn't the same you completely clean. You will have to get off that as well and that will have it's own withdrawl process. But,after giving up drugs, that's when the real work begins. We need to learn how to cope in the world w/o taking something.

What are you doing for recovery? Have you done any aftercare?

newmommy1217 · Answer

yes im currently still in the methadone program, and im on 140mg.
i didnt want to be this high up but i broke my ankle last winter and i really needed to up my dose due to the excruciating pain i was in. but other than that i have been on a taper program before and have done fine. so maybe i should go down ? im pretty sure the rule at my place is 10mg every two weeks, well 10% every two weeks. 
i could try that maybe if i go down low enough that might help..
i know before my addiction i was so active. i did sports, worked, etc.
i just dont know what to do anymore.
i find myself being super depressed because of no energy.
in my first post i said i tried energy pills and they do help but after a while it fizzles out.
i know other people that go to my clinic that have the same problem or have been through treatment and have used (adderall) to help counteract these symptoms.
im not sure if that would work?
but im open to any advice.
i just think and had brought it up before that, due to drug addiction our minds at whatever age we started to use obviously stopped growing so maybe there is something wrong there. i just think it's more than going into a clinic everyday and getting a cup of disgusting liquid. i think ''we'' should have a doctor or psychiatrists there to help us rebuild our ''mind'' essentially.i think that we would have alot more positive outcomes if we had someone figure out this sluggish, un-energetic, depressed, feeling. 
im pretty young and i just think that i should be happy and be able to go all day and not need energy pills, etc to help me through the day.

gnarly_1 · Answer

Hi well what your describing is classic methadone side effect...this drug wont get you high persay but it defiantly quits the world around you and can leave you emotionless....what dose are you on???  I was on 150mg for years and dident come back to life until I detoxed off it  it sound like you have been on it a wile I would suggest a good aftercare progam like N/A and a slow taper off it  there is life after methadone and it is so so worth it  keep posting for support we have a lot of members who have kicked this drug  more will respond......Gnarly

10356 · Answer

Hi Newmommy Glad to see you back. I'm sorry you are feeling bad, the lack of energy and mood may have to do with what mg of the meth you are on. I know they can go crazy high with the dose. I have use methadone for pain and was so surprised at how very lil it took to make a difference and how very lil it took to make me nod if I stopped for a moment. Have you considered this our tapering a bit to see ? Beyond this I recommend a full check up  with your Dr. to make sure there is no under lying cause. I wish you  well. lesa