relasped again

[Tank78]

I stoped about a month ago taking percs and vicodin, was doing really well untill my wisdom tooth was removed and i thought that i would be able to control myself with the vicodin, well i didnt and now its been two straight weeks of poping about 15- 20 a day, i should have known better but for the firat 3 daysafter the extraction of my wisdom tooth it did hurt like hell as i ended up with dry socket which i do not wish on my worst enemy, but i guess my question is anyone relaspse like this unintentionally? And will i have to go through withdrawl symptoms again?? I was doing great without them went about 3 weeks without any of them and then that damn tooth thought i was strong enough to not get back in this cycle, i have a support system in my wife, which see noticed bc she asked if i was taking them all the tine again and hid them from me and gave them to me only when it was time to help prevent me relaspseing, which worked for 2 days untill i jusg wrnt and bought some but she said she noticed me changing and can tell when im taking them bc of my attitude, i came to this forum when i first quit last time and could really use some support or words of encoragement, not looking for sympathy for its my fault for the relaspse thanks ahead of time!!!

[89NotAgain]

I am relating to u. I saw ur name and my first thought was Oh no.
We all have that monkey on our backs, get a club n whack the h*ll out of it. Thinking of u alot right now!

[meegWpaw]

I sure don't know about football Tank, but they tell me it hits the spot!  Hope you are doing aite!  be Strong

[Tank78]

Feeling very agitated tonight, craving is high tobight as well, gonna watch some football and try to get through this night.

[Wildewoman]

You are doing great!! Each day it will get better!!

[Tank78]

Thanks everyone, still doing good, but I still know there is a long road ahead, god bless you all!!!

[VICourageous]

Thanks for the update..Your Brain is still balancing back so stay away from any Mind-Altering Drugs..Good Job and Keep it up!!

[meegWpaw]

still here supporting you Tank!

[Tank78]

I hope everyone is having a great day, cravings are high again today, anxiety not as bad as yesterday, but still felt, have a wonderful evening everyone!!!

[Tank78]

This day is coming to a end, had a very strong craving this evening, but had dinner with friends and movie night with the kids and the craving has passed for now,   it was so strong, glad my mind stayed occupied bc I'll tell you the truth I wanted them so bad!!! Next obstacle tomorrow, I just would like to thank everyone for there feedback, and words of encouragement, I'm ver thankful for this forum for it has helped more than I thought it would and I'm very thankful for that!! Thank you all and goodnight!!! And hope everyone here the courage and strengrh to overcome your obstacales and defeat the demons that consume us, god bless!!!

[89NotAgain]

When I had 4 teeth cut out I mumbled "mo ni yant moo hat, I said No drugs! " lol! I feared dry socket and the like. I did well. But dry socket? I would've hit the streets like a bloodhound!

[89NotAgain]

I remember that part of it very well! You are brave, you are strong and your good spirit is to be applauded! ! Kudos! Can u hear me shouting Tank? You are amazing keep it up keep it true!

[lillypond78]

Hi tank.   I'm really proud of you.  I know exactly what you mean about the anxiety, God I just feel like dying and I'm just stopping 1/2 pill at a time, this drug is crazy, not you!

[dominosarah]

Our loved ones get the brunt of our addiction.  Nice to see you validating your wife's feelings.  Together you 2 will get thru this.

[Tank78]

Hey pineapple4 my wife just told me last night that she don't understand what I'm going through and that she knows that I don't know what she is going through, and she is  absolutly right!  We do not understand the stress and pain we cause to our significant others and I am very thankful to my wife for not walking away when that is the easy thing to do, and you should commend yourself for being there for your boyfriend, you guys through as much if not more than what we do and you guys never asked for this, my hat goes off to people like you and my wife and you guys are wonderful individuals, god bless

[Tank78]

I phycically feel a lot better than yesterday, except for the since of anxiety, I feel like I'm forgetting something like my mind going a million miles a min but with no thoughts feels weird, but day 3 has come and I'm holding strong but alond way to go yet, I'm just going one day at a time!  

[pineapple4]

My boyfriend has been struggling to stay away from smoking pills. Cause i have never been around an addict before, i never really understood the struggle it is. He turned in himself into a rehab and was clean for maybe 2months, he just relapsed and is now in jail for 90days for pissing dirty (he is in drug court)..I may not know what you guys are going through or what its like to stop something you feen for or cant go a day without but i hope the best for you and you accomplish that change for the better, everyone deserves to live their lives the way they enjoy, but i dont think drugs are the answer. Keep yourself occupied, finding a new hobbie? a job? I know i dont know you guys personally but from experience with my boyfriend, I know that urge to change is their but its a struggle to get through his day without it. If you really want to change you can! just takes one step at a time, one day at a time and surrounding yourself with positive people. Hope all is well.~~

[10356]

Hi Tank !! Congratulations on your decision to flush !! Day Two !! Good on you ! It will not be long now You are just about thru the worse.. Hot showers and baths will help a lot with the muscle aches Try to stay hydrated it is important.. a sports drink would be good to drink. Walking, moving around even if it is pacing the house will help with the restlessness.. You probably feel a lot of anxiety, this will pass It is the wd It also will make you feel like you need to cry and we do over the silliest things ! All this passes in about 5 days our at least eases a lot. Day 3 and 4 are usually the worst then gets noticeable better.. sleep will be elusive for awhile but it will come eventually. Try ti eat small amounts of food ok It will help. I'm really Proud of you that you decided to quit the taper. It will be so worth it Your wife will be so happy to get her husband back. we change behind the opiates our emotions become deadened.. Food taste better we notice Nature Beauty all the things we have missed while on opiates It all comes back.. so keep a positive attitude You can do this !! take care, lesa

[Tank78]

This is day 2 without the meds no tapper, I went no tapper bc I tried it the first day and was able to con her out of more pills so we flushed them together and now here I am day 2 cokd turkey and miserabke

[ricart70]

Is this day two without meds or day two of the taper ? What happened to the wife holding the pills?  

[Tank78]

Day 2 I feel completely horrible , I feel like I'm goibg to die, woarse feeling ever,I don't feel like doing anything but sleep, hopeing day 3 is much better prob won't be but I can no give in , my whole body is sore, I feel really anxious has anyone else felt this before?

[10356]

HI Tank.. I read your thread and was sorry to read that you are struggling with getting clean. You did have 2 days behind you. You could do that again by dumping the meds you have now our continue your taper.. Your wife just holding them for you is not enough She needs to lock them up and wear the Key. we steal and lie.. Your Dr. did not instruct to start your taper with 9 pills.. Yes we are to turn the day in and start fresh the next but we also Must be Honest with ourselves and what we are doing.. I do not mean to sound harsh I would just really like to see you succeed in getting clean for you and your family deserve it a good Life full of Joy along with the sorrow's.. I wish you well, lesa

[Tank78]

Took 9 7.5 vicodins this evening, i feel like crap, my whole mental toughness went out the door, feels like im right back to square one, these hogh and lows are so crazy to me, i really dont know how to feel, i really thought i was ready for this and to over come it this time and bam as quickly as it started it stopped, day to day i guess is my next approach and do what the doc told me to do, well goodnight and here is to a better tomorrow!!! God bless!!!

[Tank78]

Feeling really down today, very depressed, feel like im going crazy!!!!!!

[Tank78]

Just got home from my doctors appointment, i was completely shocked at how supportive my doctor was. We both decided with the approach of slowly cutting back till i am off of them, i was shocked that he perscribed me more pills. He said to fill them and they are to be in complete control of my wife, i feel horrible for putting that responsibility on her, but she is willing and i thank god she will be beside me through this. Today starts the tappering and will go on for the next 4 weeks, also he gave me a exercise program that i guess specifically helps with this type of addiction that actually triggers the bodies natruel dorphines, he said the tappering will help the w/ds but i will still experience them abd i have to fight through them and know there is light at this very long tunnel. I also recieved information on narcotics A meetings to attend as well. This is going to be hard but he said in the end i will see how much different my life will be. Keep me in yours prayers as i will be praying for you guys, and thanks for all words of encoaragement!!!!