roxy withdrawals??

[what_2do]

my boyfriend has been doing roxies for about a year now, idk exactly how many a day but my guess is he was up to at least 5-7 a day?? He recently told me the other day that he wants to do things to help himself and he cant be near me or my daughter for it because hes afraid of how he is going to act and doesnt no what to expect. in the process he has completely isolated himself and i feel so helpless...is there ANYTHING i can do to help? make him feel better? or make the process easier?...do i continue to contact him and remind him he has my love and support? or leave him alone?

[what_2do]

also does anyone no how likely it is for one to give in and relapse during detox?

[what_2do]

thanks for the comment, yes i wish he wasnt doing this on his own and would go to a rehab of some sort but i am thankful he is trying and atleast this is a step, can only pray and have faith from here on! .. i will suggest aftercare to him for sure, but im not positive how he will feel and react about it. hes stubborn as is, but hopefully he excepts it

[gnarly_1]

HI  it usually takes about 4 or 5 days with day 5 coming out of it bet there will be a need for aftercare once he is clean to help keep him like that as addicts we need to change the veary way we think and reason to overcome this it takes work to stay clean N/A is a good place to startyou can google meetings in your area good luck with all this and God bless.....Gnarly

[what_2do]

that reply definitely made me feel better, thank you for that. i guess im just having a hard time because i am so anxious for him to get through this and just come back to us! because although its him going through the physical and mental pain, im hurting as well..NOTHING even comparable im sure of that. how long does it usually take for the physical pain to subside?..and then how long does the mental cravings last? i no its different for everyone but round abouts would be helpful to give me a better understanding :) .. also i wish he would go on this and talk to people going through or having gone through the same as him, should i suggest it?

[what_2do]

ok thank you =\ .. its so hard for me to be behind closed doors for this, but you are right, if its what he asked of me then i need to respect it and only hope for the best!!

[MikeInFrance]

Fragile is th best word describe the situation.  But honestly any arguments or anything stay in the moment and are forgotten once the person gets through these first days. And he's totally not turning away from you. He is so protecting you from seeing something he has no idea of himself. Just be there for what he may need from you , which may be nothing ... As much as that ***** to hear or have to do....it can sometimes be just the right thing. Like I mentioned, make sure he has what he needs.... Maybe get him some fruits and juices and drop it off if you can. And if you see him and if he looks bad then try not to notice it too much.... It's so hard to explain .... It's one of those things that can only be felt. And it's a terrible feeling to be honest but when the person is committed and keeps a positive attitude then those tough days pass easier and he will start to feel better each day.... It's great that you are here and if you think you aren't doing anything to help then you're wrong cuz just posting here is supporting him...even if he doesn't know it.  ;)

[needhelpnow74]

Don't take anything he says or does right now personal.  It has nothing to do with you.  Nothing will guarantee success for your relationship in the future, but if you give him the support he needs right now and not the support you think he needs right now, your relationship will be at a another level when he gets sober!  Remember, support, support, support, never mothering, guiding, or advice unless he asks for it.  

[what_2do]

Yes that definitely did help, thank you for your advice! .. i just cant help but take it personal him giving me the "cold shoulder" but i guess its normal?

[needhelpnow74]

Hello, first you need to realize that most people handle things differently.  But I would also like you to know that when I quit taking I would have loved to be by myself, as would most men I think.  We don't want to show the weakness that comes with the withdrawals and we also want to have "control" over the circumstances but later realize that "control" is only an illusion!  It is ok for you to contact him once per day to make sure he is alright and make sure he has what he needs and let him know you love him and are there for him.  Keep it short and let him know it's ok if he wants to talk but not neccessary.  Let him know his daughter is ok and looking forward to him returning.  If you have to go to him to take him something he needs, make it brief and don't stay to long.  A hug, a kiss, maybe sex if you both desire and then be gone.  That will make sure he doesn't feel he's being "monitored" and you trust him and also it won't give him that dreaded pressure feeling which may drive him away.  Hope this helps!  Good luck!

[what_2do]

shouldnt take the mood swings etc personal**

[what_2do]

Thank you so much for your reply, i just feel so sad for what he is going through..and wish he never even started to begin with. i no i should take the mood swings, nastiness or if he ignores my texts/calls personal but i cant help it...idk if its because i cant relate to a situation like this but i feel like if it were me i would want him there for me, buts its almost like he turned away from me which i read is very common in the ones your closest to because you feel guilty of the hurt you caused them. ive been told to be extremely nice and loving and not fight or say anything negative his way..is there anything other that i can do though?

[MikeInFrance]

Not eating or sleeping well is what I meant to say.... Ask him how he feels and let us know ...we an offer advice through you ;)

[MikeInFrance]

Hi...    Everyone is different...for me personally I didn't want to be around anyone ...I wanted to and needed to do it myself. I was at a friends place but really just needed to fight through it alone. I didn't want anyone to see me like that and I didnt know what to expect either. As long as he has the essentials he needs like food and water and no access to any roxies then check up on him each morning with a text or call just to ask how he's doing and to encourage him.  Hopefully he knows to stay really hydrated all the time but he's probably eating or sleeping well at the moment. It takes around 5 days to get through the worst of the physical part.