trusting

[greeneyes16]

My son claims hes off Roxicet ..street name "BLUES".... but i am having a real hard time with the trust issue..... Will I ever trust him again ? hes 25 years old ...Graduated college & is living at home ..... Hes home way to much ....Doesn't hang with his home town friends since he quit using drugs ........I am always questioning him & it drives him crazy ...he told me to drug test him  anytime ...& I will ...... Will I ever trust him again /?  I'm driving him &  myself CRAZY!!!!!

[greeneyes16]

Something wonderful just happened..My son just called me & told me that he understands me not trusting him because he made me not trust him & that he is going to get a sponsor from his NA meeting .... Thats a big step in the right direction ...... You are so right ella ...I need to back off........& will ..thanks sweetie ........

[scaredmom330]

I have to agree with Ella, as hard as it is, you need to back off and trust him. If he was using he would never agree to be drug tested. If you do drug test him you will lose any faith he has in you. It is hard being a parent of a child that uses drugs. Trust me. But have a little faith in him. Be proud that he has stopped using. take care and pm me anytime you need to talk.

Scaredmom

[ImGettingClean]

It's a tough spot for you to be in, but as a recovering addict, sometimes I just want to be left alone...coming off these things causes emotiional issues and the recovering person just needs time to sort them out...

You're doing this because you love your son, but, by you always questioning him and not trusting him, you may be making the recovery process more difficult for him. just be there for him and be a support system, that will help him, and you as well....

You obviously love him and you need to show that by trusting him, being there for him or knowing when to back off when he needs his space...

[Ella789]

Awe, honey,  it's just that he needs space too and you worry as like all Mom's do.  It does drive us nuts too!   I have 3 boys,  and it is tough to not worrry, and it is right to tell them your wisdom and your concern,  after you have done that,  there is only to be there and try to tell them you still love them.   You will  always be his Mom  and we can only do just so much and then we have to let go.   I know this hurts, believe me, I know!
Hugs to you :)
Ella

[greeneyes16]

Thats what i needed to hear ....I will back off & shut my F*$@!& mouth & open my ears & eyes .... It is mistrust cause it is very new .....I'm scared for my only child ....... But i will back off...Thanks for sharing.... Trish

[Ella789]

Can  he ever trust you to leave him alone?  Please, back off this kid,  if he is useing then it will make him want to use more, and if he isn't useing then I am sure he wants to will all the mistrust.
Ella