Definatly not stupid....absolutly correct! Getting clean is the easy part, STAYING CLEAN is the hard part. Again though.....this is where aftercare comes in....it will help with the cravings, anxiety, etc....
Everyone here who was addicted knows exactly what you're going through. The first few days while you feel horrible it's very easy to feel like you'll never take another pill. Then you start feeling better and think, "hey since I'm no longer addicted I can have a few" etc. It's just the addiction talking. As more and more time goes by those thoughts will come less frequently and you'll get better at shunting them aside when they do. For now you really have to be vigilant about letting your mind wander down the wrong path.
Congrats on Day 9!!!! And congrats on the taxes!!! I always do mine by myself too....just always seemed easier! You should be proud of yourself! You have come so far!!! Keep fighting those cravings! It is hard to do sometimes but you just have to keep your mind on other things! Once you get to the meeting on Wednesday night youll hear things that will help you fight it!!! I still think about being high....not every day anymore but it seems to come at the strangest times! Thankfully I have no access to them though and to get any would take a lot of days of manipulating to get them. By that time the craving is way gone and life just goes on! Have you checked out meetings online? AA has quite a few of them and I could only find 1 for NA at 10pm every night. But if you are up at 10 then it might be worth checking out!!! Here is the AA site http://www.aaonline.net/ and here is the NA site http://na-recovery.org/Narcotics_Anonymous_Recovery_Chat_Online_Meeting_Home.html They might be helpful for you since you only have one night a week that you can go to a meeting! Keep hanging in there!!!
Do all Ameeicans have to do their own taxes?
In England the government take your taxes directly out of your wages before you get them....its called PAYE (Pay As You Earn). The only exception being people who are self employed..
A bit off topic I know but its something I've always wondered.
Well done for being on day 9 by the way...that's excellent!!
Congrats on day 9!! I'm on day 6 and am jonesing today! I think someone said it in an earlier post that it's easy to not want a pill when you're going through the horrible w/d's but now that you feel better, you think "why not?"
I think the same thing too, that I've been clean for 6 days now so if I did take anything, I could get high on less - it's terrible, but you're not alone in your thinking.
My husband and I have been getting along better for the last few days because I'm not so on edge and crabby and that's what I try to keep thinking about. Hang in there - you're doing awesome!!